But soon, if a Scottish academic has her way, they may be able to come up with an altogether more sophisticated answer. (Note: this will not be: “Who cares? You’re blocking the telly.”)

Lisa Macintyre, of Heriot-Watt University in Edinburgh, is conducting an inquiry into women’s bottoms. Though hardly a first in absolute terms, this may well be — as she claims — the first scientific study into how clothing can affect the appearance of the female backside.

Dr Macintyre, a lecturer in the School of Textiles and Design at the university, is an expert on medical textiles. Her PhD thesis involved an investigation into the use of pressure garments for treating scar tissue.

She believes that her latest research project could have important implications for designers and retailers. Female volunteers wearing hundreds of types of clothing will have their bottoms photographed for the research.

Participants will then be asked to look at the pictures to assess how big or small each model’s backside appears.

The study will examine how various designs, colours, patterns and fabric types can affect the perception of bottom size.

Dr Macintyre, 33, said that four models had been chosen to provide as representative as possible a sample of female bottoms.

One has an average-sized backside while another has a much fuller bum. The third model is slim with a small bottom — reminiscent, perhaps, of Kylie Minogue — past winner of Rear of the Year — while another has a curvier behind, like Jennifer Lopez, the actress and singer.

Dr Macintyre said: “There’s much discussion in the media of clothing styles that flatter the body, and it’s generally accepted that enhancing body perception can improve confidence and self-esteem, but the factors behind this have never been fully investigated in a proper scientific manner.

“Designers and consumers don’t currently have access to established information that could enable them to make or choose garments that enhance body size and shape.

“This study will provide, for the first time, detailed and usable information that would enable designers to make the clothes that help women make the most of their natural assets.”

As a first instalment, Dr Macintyre promises to reveal how different styles of trouser can affect the appearance of bottom size. This should be published in May.

Women, of course, already have their own theories about this, some favouring skin-tight jeans, while others go for looser cuts or bolder patterns.

As Yoko Ono discovered years ago in her pioneering artwork, Bottoms, they come in a huge variety of different shapes. William Shakespeare probably put it best when he wrote: “There’s a divinity that shapes our ends, rough-hew them how we will.”

He may possibly have had something else in mind.

The female bottom has been a focus for designers since the 19th century, when the bustle highlighted and exaggerated its shape.

In the 1940s and 1950s Betty Grable, Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell gave the world a fuller, rounder rear view. The modern trend has been for shape without quite so much substance — tough luck on larger ladies.

But if Dr Macintyre’s research project bears fruit, all women will be able to make the best of their natural assets.

In due course, she plans to apply for a government research grant to expand the study.

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