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This is not some make-believe, Alice-in-Wonderland world, but Britain in 2006, as experienced by pensioners and revealed by two new surveys.
Coming after a report from three NHS watchdogs that concluded that older people were subjected to entrenched ageism and to “patronising and thoughtless” attitudes, the latest research raises the uncomfortable question: is this really all there is?
Ten per cent of retired people work part-time for an average of 14 hours per week to supplement their income.
But with an estimated pensions gap of £57 billion, this figure is set to increase dramatically, according to a survey of 500 people, both working and retired, by insurer GE Life.
Almost one in five people believe that they will need to continue working part-time once they retire — double the number of those currently retired.
With the average pension fund producing an income of just £4,381 a year, many retired people admit that they could have planned better.
A third said that they were financially unprepared, while a similar proportion were unsure how they would survive the rest of their retirement. More than half of people nearing retirement said they wished that they had started saving earlier.
It is not all doom and gloom, though, at least not if your idea of fun is a gentle promenade along a pier and easy access to affordable car parking.
Southend-on-Sea in Essex is the best place to retire, according to a separate study by Yours magazine. The title, aimed at the over 50s, ranked 60 retirement destinations in Britain, taking into account factors such as house prices, council tax, shopping facilities, crime rates, hospital waiting times, the availability of NHS dentists and the weather.
Southend was ranked top because it is relatively flat with a pedestrianised centre, its council tax is almost £100 lower than the average, and it has a low rate of crime. It is also has seven miles of beaches, the world’s longest pier, and more than 80 parks and open spaces.
Poole in Dorset came second, thanks to its natural harbour, good shops, farmers’ market and affordable parking. The waiting time for a hip replacement in the town is also only 84 days, compared with a national average of 128 days.
Whitehaven in Cumbria was third, with below average waiting times for a hip replacement and house prices nearly half the national average.
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