Gwyneth Paltrow is blaming her “seventh-grade Spanish” for comments reported in a Portuguese newspaper that have caused outrage in her native US. Paltrow, who is married to the British singer Chris Martin, did not say — as was reported in Diario De Noticias — that the British “are much more intelligent and civilised than the Americans”. She did say, apparently, that “Europe is a much older culture and there are differences”. Indeed. We are more intelligent and civilised.

A fuss has been brewing on the pages of the Manchester Evening News about a Catholic priest who has persuaded the city authorities to refuse a late-night licence to Ithaca, a top-end bar. “Ridiculous,” writes one Simon Fuller, on the paper’s website. “No one should exploit religion to sway decisions.” Strangely, this Fuller gives his address as that of Simon Fuller, the pop svengali who launched the Spice Girls. “It’s an imposter,” insists a spokesman. “Our lawyers are dealing with it.” Fine. But why?

Postscript

The natural born leaders of men lead a lonely life. Presumably preparing for his showdown with Gordon Brown, George Osborne, the Shadow Chancellor, was seen lunching alone this week in the Portcullis House foyer, with only an Innocent smoothie, a biryani and a copy of Hansard for company. “Nobody even went up to say hello,” says our spy. “He was there for half an hour. I wanted to hug him.”

Emily Maitlis, the Newsnight presenter, is discovering the perils of fame. “People seem to spot me when I’m in Boots buying a pregnancy test,” she tells the Jewish Chronicle.

Why was Sylvester Stallone’s first script never filmed? He tells Premiere Magazine: “My first script was Cry Full, Whisper Empty in the Same Breath. It was about a rock singer who couldn’t stop eating bananas.” And to think that he wrote Rocky.

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