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Three pieces of research — all independent of each other and all published in the past few months — point in the same direction: single men aged between 19 and 44 are 1½ times more likely to die before 50 than their married counterparts. And the time they spend alive is more likely to be plagued by bouts of loneliness, depression and poverty than if they were paired up.
Now social anthropologists have caught up with this breed and have tagged them, studied them, found out what makes them tick. A combination of the rootlessness of modern living, likely genetic predisposition and the financial independence to do what they want marks them out.
They are more likely to be risk takers, obsessives and workaholics. They are more likely to die violently than are their married counterparts. Hollywood has designed a TV series round them. In Entourage, produced by Mark Wahlberg and loosely based around his own experiences, a handsome actor and his pals drink and party their way around Tinseltown.
The series is reminiscent of a male version of Sex and the City. Candace Bushnell, the creator of that series, coined a phrase to describe such bed-hopping lotharios: toxic bachelors. Today the meaning of the phrase has been extended to cover any single man destined to become a victim of his lifestyle.
Toxic bachelors have appeared on the radar of marketing companies eager to exploit the potential spending power of a generation of high earners with no family responsibility. Experian, the market research firm, has identified them as “city adventurers” in its people classification system.
The defining characteristics of the group are that they are single, typically aged 25-39 and work in the private sector with an average wage of more than £40,000. They will be A/B in the social classing system, educated to degree level and their hobbies will include eating out, going to the pub and the cinema and surfing the internet. They will probably ski or snowboard and when asked they will say they are interested in, and knowledgeable about, wine (though they probably aren’t). They will not read romantic fiction, keep pets or enjoy gardening, bingo or bird watching.
Although these new bachelors probably live alone, their apartments do not resemble something out of Men Behaving Badly, rather they are full of gadgets; a state of the art juicer, PlayStation, a flatscreen HD TV and a surround sound system.
“These young men are like boyish Roman emperors in their own worlds,” says Phillip Hodson, a psychologist who has studied their behaviour. “We have a much more hedonistic culture than we have ever had before and more money. There has also been a complete change from the command society that we used to have so young men can now make up their own set of values. There are whole groups of young men who dream of being a 24-hour-a-day Jeremy Clarkson — forgetting that he is actually married with children.
“It is very difficult to grow up unless you need to and if you are allowed not to grow up then you won’t. Men are different from women, who are often self-starting and self-motivating. Men need a kick up the arse.”
Take Martin Russel. He is 31 and a salesman living in Nunhead, southeast London. He lives in a three-bed Victorian semi with two other bachelors and a £400 coffee machine. He spends his money on what catches his eye and lives life with few of the responsibilities of his father’s generation. “My last car was a Lotus Elise. I got rid of it but I have just spent the weekend driving Ferraris,” he says. “The last thing I bought was a £1,200 Sony Vaio laptop. I’ve made up to 4½ grand a month playing internet poker on it.”
Russel goes out with friends two or three times a week, typically to bars in and around London, and drinks Hoegaardens or rum and Cokes with maybe a few sambucas or tequilas thrown in. A night out will cost up to £100.
Then there is Gareth Thomas, a 39-year-old music journalist and band manager who lives alone above his favourite bar in a “very middle-class microcosm” in Battersea, southwest London. “Settling down sounds like a dark tunnel with no exit,” he says.
He holidays usually out of season in exotic locations such as Thailand or Singapore and when in London goes out most nights of the week. “I generally go to places I’m invited to for work — gigs, showcases, industry events, film screenings, club and art gallery openings — and because I manage a band I frequently go out to see them. Quite often I’ll go to two or three places in one night.”
Though toxic bachelors can rake in big bonuses, on average they earn less. According to Civitas, the London-based policy think tank, married men have incomes on average 15% higher than single men. Researchers claim that greater work commitment, a decreased likelihood of resigning and more stable personal routines are the reasons marriage is wealthier as well as healthier.
The latest figures from the Office for National Statistics show that single men aged 45 have a 23% greater risk of an early death than married men and last month a report published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health found that single men in America are 58% more likely to die before they hit 50 than their married counterparts.
“Singledom is dangerous,” says Professor Andrew Oswald of Warwick University, an economist who has published papers on the link between happiness and health. “Scientifically it is hard to explain exactly why your relationship status affects your health but we have lots of evidence that it does. And it goes far beyond the old idea that married men or those in a relationship have a better diet, are less likely to be involved in a brawl in a pub and don’t ride motorbikes. It is to do with the link between personal satisfaction and the immune system and the way that the body is able to withstand shock.”
Oswald cites one experiment where a group of volunteers was exposed to the common cold virus. Those that were married or in a strong relationship (and therefore deemed to be more satisfied) were less likely to develop a cold. In other words, their immune systems coped better and they were less likely to fall prey to illness or infection. The effect was marked. “The experiments show that being married for a man almost offsets the effects of smoking — in other words, its effect is enormous,” Oswald says.
But being a toxic bachelor, you probably won’t care. Because you won’t be worrying about your retirement; your motto will be like James Dean’s: live as if you’ll die today.
When a robot’s thoughts turn to love
George is the archetypal toxic bachelor, but computer generated. A “chat box” with artificial intelligence, he won the 2005 Loebner prize for most convincingly human robot. He remembers everything said to him and gives answers based on that.
Q: Are you single?
George: Yes, as it happens.
Q: What’s it like to be a bachelor?
George: I live my life.
Q: When did you last have a girlfriend?
George: When did you last have tea?
Q: Have you ever been in love?
George: Man, stop asking me that.
Q: Would you like to get married?
George: Yes, perhaps, but I don’t mean to you.
Q: What do you think love is?
George: Love is accepting someone no matter what their flaws are, and always thinking and doing for them no matter what.
Q: Have you ever been in love?
George: That is my own business.
Q: Are you afraid of commitment?
George: Yes. Isn’t everyone?
Q: Are you afraid of dying young?
George: I suppose.
Q: Are you happy at the moment?
George: No.
Q: Why aren’t you happy?
George: Relationship problems.
Q: Would you like to be married one day?
George: Not at the moment.
Q: Why are you still single?
George: I just haven’t found the right person.
What’s your prognosis?
ARE YOU A TOXIC BACHELOR?
1 Where do you live? a) You share a flat with two Australian blokes who run a bar. The flat’s above a pole-dancing club b) With your wife, three children, Latvian au pair, dog and a stick insect called Posh c) In a comfy mansion in Weybridge
2 What are you doing tonight? a) Playing naked paintball with a couple of girls from the office b) Bedtime stories, ironing, Newsnight, bed c) Polishing your platinum discs
3 What did you do last weekend? a) Can’t remember but I’ll tell you one thing — that’s the last time I drive to Oslo for a stag do b) Supermarket, car wash, swings and slides, bedtime stories, more ironing, bed c) The Lord’s work
4 You read a leaflet about the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases. Do you: a) Tell yourself it’ll never happen to you b) Tell yourself that chance would be a fine thing c) Puzzle over what the photographs might be
5 A beautiful girl is pestering you to get married. What excuse do you use to fob her off? a) I would but my doctor says I’ve only got months to live b) I don’t think my wife will be very pleased c) Give it a rest, Sue Verdict
Mostly a): If you were any more toxic she’d be calling in the environmental health people. Mostly b): Fully detoxed. Mostly c): You are Sir Cliff Richard