In case you hadn’t noticed, there’s going to be lot of rugby on telly these next few weeks, bringing out the armchair fan in us all. Although football was always my game, I love my rugby too, which is just as well, because I’ve married into a real rugby family. My father-in-law Chris is the ringleader. He’ll sit there with his Scotland shirt on, beer in hand, demanding we all get kitted up as well before he’ll let us in the room. And my wife Tana’s two brothers, Luke and Adam, who play for Sevenoaks, like their sport too. It will all be quite civilised at first but come half-time, there’ll be a nudge, a kick, then a headlock, and before you know it, we’ll all be scrumming down in front of the TV. Serious business.



Of course, sport on TV means two things: ice-cold beers and TV dinners. This is classic curry and burger territory. The beautiful monkfish curry recipe here comes from Tana’s sister’s husband, Jonty. It’s a big, powerful dish that you can easily make in advance and reheat. You could make it with chicken, but a meaty monkfish can really sustain those robust flavours, soaking up the spices, coconut milk and fish stock. Monkfish is the heavyweight contender of the fish world, so strong it can easily be reheated a couple of times without falling apart.

I’d serve this with some fragrant rice - a pilaf or something, jazzed up maybe with some orange peel, cloves, star anise, or a cardamom pod - but remember to take them out before you dish it up. Put them in a bit of muslin, or even a square of clean J-cloth.

A burger probably makes the ultimate TV dinner: there’s no etiquette involved, no need for cutlery, and if you need a pudding afterwards, you haven’t made it big enough. The burgers at Boxwood Café in the Berkeley Hotel even get the World Cup seal of approval - England fly half Jonny Wilkinson was in the other day, and that’s what he ordered. We use veal at the restaurant, because that is where all the flavour is, but obviously you can use beef if you prefer. Classic hotels will often bind their burgers with egg whites and egg yolks and they think they’re making it richer but they’re not; they’re just diluting the taste of the meat. The fewer agents you use to bind it, the meatier it’s going to taste. The biggest mistake with burgers is making them too thin so they overcook and go all grey. Think depth rather than width and cook it like a proper fillet steak, only seasoning it halfway through the cooking process. Add the salt too early and it will extract all the moisture, which means that when you try to sauté it, it will boil in its juices and won’t take on any colour. And don’t eat it too hot, as it’s best when it’s had time to relax and cool down. Dill pickles, a bit of cos lettuce, slithers of parmesan - that’s all you need.

Finally, something a bit lighter but equally good eaten off the lap - a beautiful open crab sandwich. It’s shocking that so many kids associate crab with those plasticky sticks that are 90 per cent E numbers and dyed pink. Whoever developed them has a lot to answer for. My mum lives in Taunton and we often go down to the beach at Minehead with Lentils the golden retriever (yes, ha, ha, Gordon Ramsay’s got a vegetarian dog - well, sorry to disappoint you but he’s just called that because of his colouring). Anyway, recently the children asked to try some whelks and winkles, which were so vinegary they’d lost all their flavour, and then Megan asked to try the crab. I told her it wasn’t fresh, that it was processed crabstick, but she insisted. So I let her try one and it was so artificial, as sweet as ice-cream.

So the idea is to remind people how amazing proper fresh crab is. I’ve mashed it up with avocado, seasoned it with lime and added apple for zest and sweetness and a lettuce julienne to make it more vibrant.

So all together now: Come on, Scotland!

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