USP Anoushka’s, The Grove’s new kids’ centre, offered pre-school play and rides in golf carts.

AMBIENCE A sophisticated, unstuffy atmosphere — the Sequoia spa has a saline vitality pool and crystal steam rooms.

EXPERIENCE You strip naked and have deferential ladies pour hot oil over your buttocks—the better to knead them with warm Indonesian stones for 80 minutes (£105).

FOOD There’s a healthy spa cuisine lunch. The hotel food is tremendously expensive with sumptuous breakfasts in a kid-friendly room.

IN CROWD Loaded parents in search of undeserved pampering, without the guilt of leaving the kids with gramps.

WALLET WATCH Rates start from £250 per family room per night and include breakfast and spa use. Treatments are extra from £40.

NEED TO KNOW The Grove, Chandler’s Cross, Herts (01923 807807; www.thegrove.co.uk)

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