George Lucas should be ashamed of himself. Not content with giving us intergalactic idiots such as Jar-Jar Binks, Chewbacca and Yoda, as well as posters, video games, Hayden Christensen and endless DVD reissues, the bearded director has now teamed up with the United States Postal Service to mark the 30th anniversary of the release of Star Wars by installing 320 R2D2 post boxes. That’s four for each of America’s 80 postal districts.

The R2D2s, which will stand inside post offices from tomorrow — to deter thieves, naturally — don’t emit a holographic representation of your post. Nor will the little postboxes fly across your neighbourhood on rocket boosters But the tin cans do serve as a warning shot for the 30th anniversary as a whole. On May 25, the postal service will begin selling Star Wars stamps. And where there are stamps, Imperial Babes calendars can’t be far behind . . .

For anyone already tired of the director’s ever expanding universe of spin-offs, now might be the time to book yourself a one-way ticket to a galaxy far, far away. BURHAN WAZIR

Coming soon: the cruel sea, the really cross hills ...

We’ve had our fill of Russian mobsters, Arab despots and Eastern European warlords. The French have had their moment in the sun, as has our resident evil Brit abroad, Alan Rickman. Hollywood needs a new villain, and it looks as if it has found one: planet Earth.

M. Night Shyamalan’s latest script, The Happening , has Earth turn vigilante to settle the score with the thoughtless humans who have wrecked its environment. And it’s not the only script to take a leaf from Al Gore’s book (hey, he won an Oscar, he’s hot right now) and bring an environmental message.

The closely guarded script for the Simpsons movie is rumoured to have Homer unleash an environmental catastrophe on Springfield, while Avatar , James Cameron’s first feature film since Titanic , has humans raiding other planets having wasted all the resources on our own.

A forthcoming remake of The Creature from the Black Lagoon refers to the smash Korean hit The Host by putting the responsibility for the monster on a careless chemical spillage.

The Earth may be out for revenge, but the real bad guy is humanity itself. Are you prepared for a sideorder of guilt along with your popcorn? WENDY IDE

At last, the Butler did it

If ever proof was needed that a $70 million opening weekend can work wonders for your career then look no further than the Scottish star Gerard Butler. The 37-year-old actor was in danger of being consigned to the also-ran pile after missing out on big screen breaks in both Trainspotting (he played Rent-on in the stage version) and James Bond (he was once neck-and-neck with Daniel Craig for the reinvented role).

But now, thanks to a breath-taking display of virtuoso shouting, swiping, gouging, slicing and slightly camp muscle-flexing as King Leonidas in the incomprehensibly successful box-office smash 300 , Butler is suddenly Hollywood’s action star du jour .

Thus, first up is a rumoured starring gig as the patch-wearing renegade Snake Plissken in a big-budget remake of John Carpenter’s dystopian sci-fi classic, Escape From New York . Neal Moritz ( The Fast and the Furious ) is attached to produce, with Ken Nolan, who wrote Black Hawk Down , doing the screen-play. The role has evident glamour and iconic power, plus that all-important franchise potential. So who knows, maybe Butler could have the same career as the original Snake, Kurt Russell. Er, then again . . . KEVIN MAHER

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