Alice Miles
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So who is going to carry the buck for this failure? Late results, unmarked papers, baffled teachers, confused children. “We don't want to see excuses about poor performance, what we want to see is clear plans to raise standards.” Thus spake Ed Balls, the Schools Secretary, in June, of the 638 schools he deemed to be “failing”. He gave them 50 days to turn around or face closure or merger. (Their 50 days was up, incidentally, last Wednesday - funny that we haven't heard anything more about it. Or did they all file their reports late as well?)
Who will give Mr Balls his notice to improve? Yesterday, as his department published the results of Key Stage 2 SATs results for 11-year-olds, Mr Balls was nowhere to be heard. These are the results that headteachers have cautioned are seriously flawed: markers received the papers late; the new online system introduced by ETS, the American company to whom the marking had been contracted out, was too complex and slow. Some pupils did not exist, schools had the wrong papers returned to them, or were sent papers that hadn't even been marked; about a third of secondary school pupils did not get their results by the end of term, and legal action is now under way against ETS.
Meanwhile, many experienced markers have abandoned ship having got fed up with the chaos and ETS's unanswered premium-rate telephone lines - a child's education ransomed to profiteering on essential phone calls. It is already getting too late for another company to take over marking for the 2009 tests. This saga is nowhere near ended.
These are real children, with real futures, who have worked hard, and who are utterly confused. It is bad enough to be reduced to a set of numbers in the first place, without all the authorities behind that set of numbers failing even to produce them for you. But instead of coming out fighting for what was left of the results yesterday, Mr Balls has taken to hiding behind his statisticians.
Last week, the Schools Secretary wrote to a House of Commons committee that publication of the results was a matter for his department's “head of statistics”, who had advised that they should come out on August 5 despite headteachers' widespread concerns about missing results and marking quality.
An education minister hiding behind his statisticians is like a chancellor cowering behind his economists: it is drivel and deserves to be treated with derision. Yet the Department for Children, Schools and Families (DCSF) was at it again yesterday, a spokesman now using the statisticians to deride as not “statistically robust” a well-timed report from the think-tank Civitas.
Civitas found the overwhelming majority of secondary schools that it spoke to had their own doubts on the validity of official SATs results. Nine out of ten of Year 7 teachers who replied to a random survey by Civitas believe the Key Stage 2 SATs tests exaggerate a child's abilities, with around a third of pupils getting higher scores than they deserve. Most secondary schools have to test the children again in their first weeks to determine which level they are really at, as specific coaching at primary school has enabled pupils to skim higher marks in the SATs than they really merit.
And why the coaching? Because the scores feed into the league tables, thence into the furrowed brow of a local parent obsessing over the numbers for her child's potential school. Testing and league tables have their place in our education system, but not at the expense of clarity and honesty; the numbers should elucidate, not confuse.
You choose your statistician and your statistics to suit your case. I was reading an article in the Royal Statistical Society journal a few months ago which argued that school league tables themselves are statistically meaningless as a measure of educational quality. Funny the DCSF doesn't have any departmental statisticians telling it that. And this year's tables will be more unreliable than ever because of the added uncertainty over the accuracy of ETS's SATs results.
No ministers will ever admit to the imperfection of their charts because, in the face of scepticism about the achievements of their Government, these multicoloured graphs have become the only measure by which they can trumpet their success.
This explains the obsession with testing: it has become not a tool of policy, but policy itself. By their test results shall you praise or damn them. Imagination and good leadership have shrunk to lines on a graph.
As the date of publication of the SATs results approached, what were education ministers doing? Sending out multicoloured charts to the media to demonstrate their latest anti-obesity drive in primary schools. Hey, your kid may not be able to read, but at least he knows he's fat.
This row over SATs is not just about exam results, it is about a style of government that reduces people to blobs on graphs, to data entered in a system and then manipulated by the statisticians. It is government gone wrong: contracted-out responsibility, lack of accountability, and a ministry that can send out 3,840 pages of instructions to head teachers in a single year, but cannot get exam papers marked on time.
It is a tale of children being failed by a system that turns them into numbers on a chart; which treats their individuality as a problem, problems as targets, and then contracts pupils out to the lowest bidder with a premium-rate phone line to tout.
Great expectations fallen on hard times: it is a tale, ultimately, of the four in ten children, born in the year Labour came to power promising “education, education, education”, and leaving primary school today still without real competence in literacy, numeracy and science. Funny that those statisticians cannot come up with a chart illustrating that.

Alice Miles has been with The Times since 1999. She began as a Parliamentary Sketch writer before becoming a columnist, writing mainly on politics and national issues such as education and health. She won Columnist of the Year in 2007.
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Excellent piece, but don't hold your breath for admissions of failure from Labour. 4 in 10 children failing?...No they're not, Labour says so. Don't you know that education has never been so good? Admittedly there is plenty of money in schools but nobody cares about what it has been spent on.
judy, Liverpool, England
Remember Rabbi Ben Yokai who said, "More than the calf yearns to suck the cow yearns to suckle" - if only the control-freaks would let good teachers get on with their job as a profession: independent, self-registered, self-regulated but also showing who a good one (eg. teacher) is.
Michael Jameson, St Albans, UK
If secondary schools are testing new entrants, why do we need SATs? Let the individual schools evaluate the new children's abilities and decide what's best for them. Sorry, forgot. That would be against Labour's centralised command and control doctrine.
John, Bangkok, Thailand
Has Alice Miles ever looked at the PISA results? She would have discovered to her chagrin that UK children perform very well according to the OECD. MarkS. I's like to see you placed in front of a finals paper right now! I can just hear the whimpering!
Dectora, London, UK
We talk about education but don't get on with it. Best education: a clip round the earoles & conjugating Latin verbs.
ian cheese, london, uk
All my 4 grandkids lost their curiosity after starting their schooling. The 2 bright girls now 15, unchallenged, are bored. One boy of 13 talented in art got no encouragement and sadly has lost interest. The other boy of 13 is an 'oddball' and prefers playtime to lessons - he should do well!
Shirley Bowen, Blackpool, UK
The very heart of this is a Government unable to admit even the possibility that it is wrong. The overriding requirement of every one of these tests is to produce results that indicate the success of Government policy - irrespective of what is actually the case.
Brave New World or 1984, anyone?
Simon Stephenson, Windermere, UK
There are lies, damned lies and then statistics which is why ministers love them. You can prove just about any thing with statistics.
C Hanson, Nassau, Bahamas
Statistics are important. How many Balls are there? I think we should be told!
Paul Freeman, London , England
Does anybody seriously expect any Labour "minister" and I use that word losely, to take responsibility for their actions? If that were the case the Cabinet would be empty.
Albert Hall, kettering,
1 child who cannot read and write is a tragedy, 1 million children who cannot read and write is a statistic.
Dr Nicholas Ashley, Huntingdon, England
"We need a genuinely independent statistical body that can assure us that the numbers used are fair." You mean like the UK Statistics Authority?
Leon, Hemel Hempstead,
Could we have a devolved system and pay local groups to run their own schools such as in Sweden? Government is the problem: meddlesome, costly and totally incompetent.
Peter York, Tonbridge, Kent
I cannot get my head round your last para: "four in ten children, born [1997] leaving primary school today still without real competence in literacy, numeracy and science". These are crazy results. Why do parents stand for it? This is not Zimbabwe or Sudan.
R Mason, London, UK
Balls is an utter disgrace to his office. He makes Gord look accountable ...if thats possible.
The head, London,
All those people saying that statistics are misleading are wrong - statistics provide the only real way to assess an otherwise complicated system. It is the trust in the statistics that is lacking. We need a genuinely independent statistical body that can assure us that the numbers used are fair.
Steve, Altrincham,
ETS would seem to be quite unusually incompetent, even for a government contractor, if they run premium phone lines - money for jam - but can't even manage to answer them!
Ross, Bristol,
When you get a government as venal and cynical as this one you cannot trust results at any level. This is why we get record pass rates and higher grades, and yet employers say that job applications have lower standards than ever and colleges have to put on remedial courses in basic English and maths
John Bull, Wolverhampton,
The case for a fully privatised, voucher-funded system grows stronger with every passing day.
Michael, London,
SATs especially at KS 1 and 3, don't matter. It's high time the government dispensed with them and put the enormous amount of money they cost into schools where it is REALLY needed.
PR, Cwll,
I work closely with a number of schools and I can categorically say that standards are sinking. I do not blame our teachers but I do blame their unions, who have sat back on their collective backsides and allowed this insane and morally corrupt government to create havoc in our education system
Pete, Lincoln, England
I have just taken time off to assist my son from home due to the complete lack of education in the education system. The teachers lack creativity, the Heads lack well lack! There is no education. Having spent 6 months on the KS2 it is rubbish. I cannot say more and it is very sad. It is broken!
Graeme Blackmore, Surrey, England
I don't see the problem. Allow me to teach a small group of children until they are 11 and I will guarantee they are literate and numerate. And I'm not even a teacher, just a bloke with a few dusty 'O' levels. The sole condition is that the government must have absolutely no input whatsoever.
John, Bangkok, Thailand
My old headmaster's favourite expression was "Education comes from the Latin "educare" which means to draw out not to stuff in" And we called him "Clueless Carter".
God rest his soul and forgive us our levity.
Meyer Culper, Leatherhead,
Have a think about things in your life that are measurable (your height, weight and the length of your nose) as compared to the immeasurable (your curiosity, your capacity to enjoy and your compassion). I despair of this eternal fascination with statistical success - enjoy your holidays Jim Knight!
Nick White, Bognor, UK
Isn't it strange that after spending decades campaigning against the 11 Plus examinations, the Labour Government now imposes formal tests on pupils almost every year?
m wood, somerset, uk
I can remember when Olde Labour politicians were called technocrats on account of their view that society was comprised of distinct classes and that simply by government 'pulling the levers' everything would be 'alright'. It seems that Nu-Blu Labor still retains this regressive gene.
Terry Walpole, Seoul, Korea
Everything the government says must be a pack of lies! The Iraq war demonstrated the lack of credibility of the parlimentary process of Britain. The British government lied to its citizens over weapons of mass destruction, so they must be lying about everything else. QED
Jim Wills, Brisbane, Australia
Answer me this question: is there any aspect of education today that is better than it was ten years ago, twenty years ago or even forty years ago?
From SATs to GCSEs to A-Levels to Degrees - every single one has been devalued. We now have a much more expensive system that isn't fit for purpose.
MarkS, Leeds,
You seem to forget that Mr. Balls hasn't failed! He just has 'defferred success'
Mike, UK,
It is a shame that the author of this excellent article concludes that 4/10 children lack competence in Literacy, Numeracy AND Science. It should be OR - a majority of the 40% will have L4 in 1 or 2 of those subjects. Plus, the only statistics she is using to condemn are the flawed tests themselves!
Russell, Birmingham,
One statistic that always amazes me is how one voter in seven still supports this useless government.
Mr G, Leeds, :UK