If I were diversity officer at Tayside Police I would go to great lengths to avoid offending Muslims. I would make sure that they were not stopped and searched just for looking a bit shifty, and, nothwithstanding the Government's victory in the Commons, I would want to make sure that young Muslims were not driven into the hands of radicals by being incarcerated for 42 days without charge.

What I would not do was make a police spokesman go down on his knees and grovel for supposedly causing offence by putting a picture of a dog sitting in a policeman's hat on a poster for a new non-emergency number. Tayside Police are now in a cleft stick - they have offended me with their stupidity. It isn't that I like cooing over pooches. Far from it. I share the Muslim view that dogs are unclean and shouldn't be allowed indoors. I'd happily round up every dog in Dundee and release them in the tundra where they would have to survive by reconnecting with their inner wolves rather than whimpering pathetically for another Bonio.

What irritates me about Tayside Police is that in trying too hard to promote interfaith relations they make things worse. Real people are not offended by such trifles as a pooch on a poster. When Dundee's reporters took to the streets to find offended Muslims they drew a blank.

A spokesman for the Al-Maktara Institute for Arabic and Islamic Studies commented: “I would not say that a picture of a dog is offensive.” The Scottish Islamic Foundation commented: “There isn't an Islamic basis for taking an issue with a simple picture of a little puppy.”

The idea that Muslims are offended by the very sight of a dog seems to derive entirely from one Dundee councillor, and even he didn't try to make out that he was upset, only that others “could” be.

By rolling over and apologising, the police have made themselves look weak and inadvertently given the impression that Dundee's Muslims are an intolerant bunch intent on Islamifying the British way of life. It was the same when Birmingham City Council banned Christmas decorations, claiming that they were offensive to ethnic minorities. Reporters struggled to find anyone offended by a Christmas tree (which, in any case, is a pagan symbol) but by then it was too late - Birmingham's ethnic minority population had taken the blame for spoiling the festive season.

With public bodies given to pathetic acts of apology, offence has become a useful political tool. If you want to make a politician or public body look ridiculous, all you have to do is play at being offended by something said or written - and wait for heads to roll. It is about time our leaders stopped falling for it.

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