So you’ve taken a bus to catch a train, looked in vain for a guard on the platform to tell you when your truncated service is arriving, found that the buffet bar is closed because the staff have bunked off to the seaside and that you are sitting on someone else’s picnic in the aisle, underneath the tip-up bin and beside the toilets. And you’re still supposed to get that warm, glowing feeling from having taken a train rather than a car for your bank holiday weekend, thus helping to save the planet.

I have struggled for years to take trains whenever I can. I didn’t mind when they reconfigured the seats to compete with budget airlines or when they took away the dining cars. I was resigned to the fact that The Railway Children would now find that their local station was unmanned and that their antics would be seen only on CCTV camera. I understood that the railways could no longer be romantic. Brief Encounter could never happen now that you need a ticket to go through the barriers and wave goodbye to loved ones. Murder on the Orient Express would be impossible now that everyone is concertinaed into each other’s armpits rather than luxuriating in their own compartment.

I can cope with everything but the price. Taxpayers have given billions of pounds to maintain environmentally friendly transport around Britain, yet families, the elderly and the cost-conscious are being driven off the tracks. Just as the recession hit, many fares increased by more than three times the rate of inflation and railcards fares have increased in some cases by more than 25 per cent. But at least if you thought ahead you could make a reservation. Now National Express are trying to force you to pay £5 to book a return seat, which you should be guaranteed anyway after you have bought your exorbitant ticket (only their own staff are exempt.) Then last weekend First Great Western doubled the cost of a Weekend First to £20. These supplements were introduced because of overcrowding at the back of the train. As the trains are half as fast at weekends due to engineering works, sitting in a first-class carriage helped while away the hours. Now they are affordable only to businessmen who won’t travel at the weekend anyway. And you can’t leave your car at the station any more either, at Birmingham New Street it will cost you £55 for four hours.

When Lord Adonis, the transport minister, travelled round the country by rail last month, he praised his Rover pass for being cost-effective at £375 for the week. The rail companies immediately put the price up to £430. The fat controller has been replaced by the thin accountant; soon only your local MP will be letting the train take the strain.

Times Recommends

• Strip away the figleaf and reveal naysayers
• Dave’n’George: there may be trouble ahead
• I do not accept that £64,000 a year for politicians is peanuts