India Knight
Take a trip to New York and see the city from the air
‘Dr” Gillian McKeith, the unhealthy looking and quasi-coprophiliac “health guru” who humiliates fat people on television, last week agreed to drop the “doctor” part of her name in advertisements. This followed an investigation by the Advertising Standards Authority, which had come to the preliminary conclusion that the use of the word was likely to mislead the public. McKeith at this point agreed to its removal, which means that the ASA’s adjudication will not now be published, since McKeith’s company, the grandly named McKeith Research, withdrew the word “doctor” voluntarily.
It’s not the first time that McKeith has been censured by regulators and there seems to be a question mark over the validity of some of her qualifications. Ben Goldacre, the journalist and (real) doctor, pointed out last week that his dead cat, Hettie, was, like McKeith, a “certified professional member” of the American Association of Nutritional Consultants, the membership having been bought online for $60.
What’s interesting about this is how willing people are to suspend disbelief when it comes to “improving” themselves. I look at McKeith and I think, “If eating like you means looking as unwell as you, thanks, but no thanks.”
Presumably this isn’t that wildly unusual a reaction — I mean, we all have eyes. And yet people appear to be queueing up to be humiliated by her on television, told that their insides are like cesspits and worse and have their excrement examined in public. Perhaps they’re just desperate — in which case it seems unkind, to put it mildly, to reduce some of them to tears of shame and self-disgust on national television.
But anyway: my point is, whatever happened to instinct? Do hundreds of thousands of people really need to be told how to eat — to be told that guzzling vast quantities of chips is bad for you, or that drinking water is better than drinking the fluorescent fizzy stuff? I don’t want to sound hypocritical here, having just written a diet book, but I do think that the reason why the book has done well is that my co-author and I make no claims of expertise whatsoever — quite the contrary, in fact. The approach is clearly not without appeal.
Yet elsewhere the public’s appetite for “experts” seems insatiable. People who have babies get their knickers in the most terrible twist, agonising over which “childcare expert” they should turn to for advice. The childless Gina Ford is a popular choice, completely inexplicably to me (she once informed me that her lawyers watched me closely, so I’d just like to pause here and give them a cheery wave).
In some childcare experts’ hands, a three-month-old baby is no longer just a sweet little baby but a difficult and demanding creature that must be bossed into conforming to certain parent-pleasing patterns — instead of being left in peace to get on with its own baby-pleasing little routine of sleeping, eating, filling nappies and being kissed.
Once that’s happened, the poor old baby is quite likely to be dragged from one “expert” to another during its infancy — something that would be understandable if the child were ill, but that makes no sense at all given that it’s healthy. And yet here they come: the osteopaths, the naturopaths, the homeopaths, the baby massage “expert”, the child nutritionist, the sleep adviser, on and on. It’s like a parallel universe populated by mad people. And yet the parents all have instincts, which they have decided not to trust. Why?
In some quarters I’m sure this loony kind of behaviour is born out of love — out of wanting one’s child to have the best of everything and not taking any chances. But the end result is overcoddling to the point that an older child, already worked incredibly hard at school, doesn’t have time to play outside in the evening because of a) homework; b) music; c) drama; d) fencing; e) astrophysics; f) Sanskrit (probably), and so on.
Whatever happened to running about prodding things with sticks and getting muddy? And then, of course, when the child rightly rebels against this hothousing onslaught — showing, at least, that its spirit hasn’t been entirely crushed — its well-meaning parents call in the child psychologist. Because they trust an expert and they don’t trust themselves.
They’re everywhere, the experts. We can’t cook any more, apparently — we need armies of people telling us how to address the problematic question of vegetables. We can’t have relationships without ludicrous self-help books in which complete strangers, usually American, usually low on charm, tell you very specifically what to say or not to say to your boyfriend. It’s all very well making fun of them — I wish we’d do it more often — but these books, DVDs, guides and manuals sell by the million.
What’s wrong with us? We can’t even have sex. You’d think it wasn’t that complicated and that in this department, if in no other, instinct might take over but apparently it’s not simple at all. It’s rocket science and we need TV shows to tell us how we’re doing it wrong, more guidebooks, more “experts”. It’s like a collective form of extreme hypochondria.
What I’d really like to know — unfortunately, there’s no research available that I can find — is whether this Niagara of “expert advice” actually improves anyone’s quality of life. From my observations, it just makes people anxious, stressed and dissatisfied, but I could be wrong — maybe paying someone to tell you that yellow makes you look a bit peaky is as genuinely helpful as going to see a good mortgage adviser. But our collective willingness to suspend disbelief and to dole out large sums for the privilege would suggest some problem with self-esteem. Are we really that lost? Is everything really that confusing?
It would seem so. Our own opinions count for nothing until they have been backed up by some random bogus person banging on about “research” and “findings”. We clearly feel that life is, or ought to be, reducible to a series of instructions, a bit like a bookcase from Ikea, and that we couldn’t possibly work out the instructions for ourselves using a mixture of instinct and experience. Like needy children, we need approbation at every turn.
Expertise used to be interesting. You’d listen, frowning with concentration, as some boffin on Newsnight explained some otherwise impenetrable piece of complicated science, and you’d go to bed feeling you’d learnt something. That still happens, thank God, but real experts have become the minority. These days everyone’s an expert: no subject is too small, too insignificant or too ridiculous — and no qualification too bogus.

India Knight was born in 1965. She lives in London with her three children, writes a weekly column for The Sunday Times, and a weblog, Isn't She Talking Yet?, on bringing up a child with special needs. She has also written two novels, My Life on a Plate and Don't You Want Me?
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Looking on the bright side, watching McKeith and her victims does allow you a slight glow of self-satisfaction: you think, well I may have a few issues but hey, at least I'm neither a weird poo freak pretend doctor or someone so stupid they don't realise that a diet consisting entirely of pies makes you fat.
Amanda, London,
Gillian McKeith is indeed very nasty to these fat people. My problem with her, apart from the fact that she's not a real doctor, is that a You Are What you Eat, Six months later has never been done. And nor will it, because I can guarantee all the newly slim particpants will have put the weight back on again. Anybody who switches to a radical diet, mainly consisting of fruit, veg and fish is going to drop a lot of weight very fast. But you can't change deeply ingrained eating patterns without a lot of hard work. And who really likes those disgusting smoothies and hideous rush matting meals she concoctes? It's not a realistic, long term, eating plan.
Dr (real) Evie Wallace, London, UK
Gillian McKeith has provided an excellent programme on obesity. It is more a documentary of our times, the ignorance of the great unwashed spilling over week after week and no sign of anyone out there taking a blind bit of notice. Revisit it in a year and I guarantee 95% recidivism. So Gillian is nasty and horrid to these obesity sufferers. Well she has to be, otherwise they'd carry on being fat. Whether or not the info sinks in or is forgotten over a few months would be more interesting. Attention span is not great in the UK right now. Emotive issues like this always descend in to personality and character assassination - all part of the same problem really.
Chris Dare, Crawley, England
I think that McKeith is a loathesome creature. She has neither empathy nor sympathy for her "victims", who seem quite happy to be humiliated by her, and really is not a good advertisement for the lifestyle she so viciously advocates. But, she is obviously quite smart, and has realised that some folk are less well-motivated than others and have to hand their personal well-being over to someone else. All McKeith is doing is preying on others' insecurities. She's not alone though. There is an endless list of "celebrities" willing to sell you their latest product that should help you to greater health, wealth and happiness. However, there is always an however in these instances, do ANY of these celebs have any empathy or sympathy with anyone other than themselves? They are ALL needy, egotistical, and probably self-loathing to some extent. Which is where McKeith comes back into the equation; I think her mantra is "I loathe myself, so should you." Which is why she gets such a kick out it all.
CHRIS HALEY, Ashby de la Launde, UK
Gastropubs dining offer covering the token 20 advised to send an A5 SAE stamped to 41p to Gastropubs Guide, Customer Liaison Department, 1 Virgina Street, London E98 1RL.
I did using 1st class mail. I have heard nothing!!!!
I have lost 83p plus cost of two envelopes and I still do not have a list of the participating pubs.
A raw deal?
Chris Dutta, Portsmouth, Hants
The 'experts' that Ms Knight criticises so appropriately also remind me of the glut of opinion columnists in newspapers and other media. These columnists seem to confuse their self-important, opinionated ramblings with expert comment that will be of huge benefit all us poor lost idiots who need them to think for us.
Simon, London,
More cheers for India - absolutely refreshing, as always. (Is that simply because I find myself in agreement with her on so much of what she contributes?)
The world is full of so called 'experts' - the fastest way to become one is to appear but once on TV or Radio. That we listen to them, and to the vacuous views of 'celebrities' may simply be a reflection of long lost experience of life - both in childood (no time for muddy sticks) and parenthood. We have lost time to spend with our children and are too willing to give ourselves over to the financial rat race which appears to be the sole yardstick of our 'success'.
Keep up the excellent work you you contribute, India. Your baseline for much of what you write is that rare application of - commonsense!
Tony Stevens, Sydney, Australia
At the end of the day it all boils down to money and marketing. These 'experts' are really hard sell marketing gurus in disguise. They know how to make you feel inadequate and how to play on your needs so that their advice is constantly in demand, and thus marketable in books and DVD's. 24hr news culture hasn't helped either, with news channels and newspapers constantly trying to find anything, no matter how small, to fill editorial space.
News these days isn't about news. Its about speculation and tittle tattle. Like the two Les Dawson characters who used to chat over the fence. All these 'experts' out there are constantly being asked for their opinion and being made to look important by the media in general who cover and give their causes publicity.
But then everyone is entitled to earn a living, and if people continue to buy the products thats freedom of choice at work.
Simon, Malvern, UK
According to a news report today in The Star President Thabo Mbeki is importing a security was for his residence at a cost of R90 million. (6,452,305.10 British Pounds) This is after he has stated that crime is not a concern in this country.
Emma, Johannesburg,
I agree with what India has said (for once), and the way I see it is there are more reosurces (with the net & TV) to find an "expert" opinion.
Regarding my own kids, I have 1 or 2 books that I may look at every few months just for a bit of a) reassurance and b) fresh perspective. These so-called experts can give you an idea you may have had, be it cooking a Thai green curry or getting your kids to sleep through the night in their own beds.
Just like many things in life (especially drink and tobacco in my case) moderation is key, but one should not rely to heavily on "experts", because one will become addicted and be unable to think for oneself regarding what to cook, changing sleeping patterns, getting a new job, etc
Graeme Carter, London, UK
It seems to me that we are being conditioned into believing that we know nothing these days. The 'Nanny knows best' state has removed people's confidence in their own abilities.
We are not even allowed to cross the road on our own any more. It won't be long before the jaywalking laws of Germany and America are enforced here.
At my local supermarket the other day the path outside had a warning sign 'Slippery when wet'. It was raining!
The covert message is 'Don't trust your instincts' 'You are incapable of looking after yourself' or your family.' 'Only Big Brother can run things'.
Fight back. Don't go to the doctor with a cold; eat real food; leave your kids alone.
jane, loughborough, uk
Well, Elisabeth of London, I think India Knight is fab! Everything she says is a golden nugget of truth. I don't even get out of bed without consulting my home-made book 'India's Pearls of Wisdom'. She's always right: have you not noticed the number of posts asserting how right she always is? Some cynics would say 'suspicious', but not I - she pays me too well. Now I'm going to read the article (LOL)
Eugene, Brno, Czech Republi
You're right, "whatever happened to instinct?"
Why do we need to buy yet another book on how to diet...?
Rav, Reading,
Isn't it amazing how a simple idea about not being mislead can be misconstrued into meaning "don't trust anyone, no matter how properly qualified/experienced in their field, just go with your instincts". That is not what the lady said at all.
India Knight's point is about "experts" in inverted commas (for the gullible amongst us that means folks wot ain't really any better at it than the rest of us). Her main point is for people to develop enough life-skills (used to be called common sense) to be able to sort good information from flattery, sycophancy, manipulation, exploitation and plain and simple conning!
The real definition of an expert is simple: it is someone who knows how to find the correct information relating to a problem and then, having found it, knows how to apply it to produce the desired result. To achieve that status requires training, experience and in general, qualifications (real ones) in the appropriate fields. If you really need one better hope they comply
Peter Jones, Caernarfon, Wales
As a psychiatrist and not an 'expert' I feel the most worrying problem with 'experts' is that they can prey on the vulnerable. I have had patients consult 'experts' at significant cost and give up their medication, or worse take something that will make them worse resulting in distressing consequences all round. Everyone now can find an expert that will agree with their view or nuture their anxiety etc. but few have the ability to weigh up or critically appraise the 'evidence' that these experts purport (see 'Dr' McKeith, Gina Ford et al) thus making the whole thing at best useless and at worst dangerous. Teach people to think for themselves by giving them the skills to evaluate and appraise 'evidence' and not just settling for a glossy magazine article / TV show as being gospel truth. 'Don't believe everything you read in the papers' used to be the maxim but unfortunately now even the lovely Jade Goody could sell 'expertise' and get a large following
Katy, Kent,
Elisabeth - no expertise or qualifications which she fully admits, but she does have experience which is more than most, if not all, diet book authors have.
Many of the experts she mentions above have neither qualifications nor experience - doesn't that make you question their expertise?
Emma, London, UK
Because I lost 5 stone, love. Which I feel qualifies me to write about weight loss. Hope that helps!
India Knight, london,
What Ms Knight is saying is that if people used the brains and experiences and just plain common sense that the gods gave them instead of seeking the "advice" of others then perhaps you wouldn't have 3 year olds on adult antipsychotic drugs because they are hyperactive and therefore must be "bi-polar". Or the million $ industry of "diet" pills..none of which work any better than eating less and exercise. Maybe it's just the human desire to have our own opinions validated...unfortunately many of these same experts cause nothing but more grief and trouble.
Linda, Santa Fe, USA
Just to get this right...taking advice from experts is bad because they don't really know anything and we should all follow our own instincts.
But taking advice from someone who, by their own admission, has no expertise or qualification to write about the subject (India Knight on diets), is good.
Er, why?
Elisabeth, London, UK
I'd just like to ask, if America were to disappear, who's second on the list of foreigners that Brits use to blame all their problems on? My gut says it would be the Irish, but you never know, it could be the Germans.
I guess blaming yourselves is just out of the question, right?
Ollie, Bird-in-Hand,
One should be a sceptic, progress happens through questioning and critique- so pick holes in everything!
Polly, Epsom, UK
Thank God! India Knight is a breath of fresh air. Thank you for stating the obvious perhaps, but really for pointing out what is the truth, that all these 'cures' are just a reflection of our lack of self-reflection.
hanna, London, UK
There is nothing wrong with testing your expectations against empirical evidence, indeed there is no other way of deciding if they are valid or completely bogus. The problem is that the population in general is not scientifically literate enough to tell the difference between poorly performed (junk) science which would be rubbished in any sensible scientific journal (but pervades our TV screens masquerading as established scientific doctrine) and real science which could stand up to peer review.
Perhaps courses in ''Critical scientific thinking" within GCSE science might be the answer, where students were encouraged to learn the difference between what was bogus and what was likely to withstand scrutiny. Usually it's fairly easy to tell without much specialist knowledge, it just requires a bit of sensible reasoning.
William Leyland, Cambridge,
As much as I may agree with specific instances raised, I consider the author's general attitude an arrogant one. Can she not be prepared to believe that there are many things in life which are too complicated (or at least too deep) for one person to grasp them all? As much as I would tend to support the theory that many purported experts' qualifications are bogus (or, at least, their expertise not as wide-ranging as they might claim) and that identifying people's worth is often very difficult from outside, I tend to believe that taking advice from the truly knowledgeable is often wise and not to do so represents undesirable stubbornness rather than anything else.
By logical extension, my personal preference is for a "big state" government which thought this way and broadly (though, I emphasise, not to extremes) ensured its people made good decisions rather than giving them the freedom to hurt themselves through bad ones, though I am aware this is likely to be a minority opinion.
Chris D., Middlesbrough, UK
Logical philosophers have shown that appeals to authority are a form of fallacy. Appeals to expertise should be thought of in the same way. And credentials are a crude proxy for expertise anyways. But to suggest that "instinct" or "common" sense should be our guides is just the typical pundant's nostalgic lament for the good old days (of the hunter-gatherer society). Empirical evidence is the way forward. And everyone should be taught the skills to judge it. It's too bad that educators don't seem to think so.
Peter, Ottawa,
Hmm.
Q: Who is the expert here? On what subject? With what qualification?
A: Me! Anything at all! No qualifications whatsoever! Qualifications are meaningless now that everyone's got one, so my lack thereof makes me uniquely qualified to comment!
d, b,
There must be somewhere that offers a Masters Degree in Bogus Expertise. does anyone know where?
Tom Knott, Maidstone, UK
Indeed, these people invent hateful new words like "neutraceuticals".
"Smithers, release the hounds!"
Mark, Hong Kong,
HEAR HEAR ! About time someone decried the "experts" !
theodore potts, st. ives, australia
I must be getting mellower with age but this is the second time in a month I have agreed with Ms Knight. We need an expert to tell us how to get rid of all these experts!
Gordon Robson, Ayr, Britain
Before I comment can you prove your expertise in this field so that I don' t feel short changed in having read your column.
Bill, Belfast , N.I.
Without casting any personal aspersions, or any sense of malice towards some individual be it "Dr" Gillian, the health guru or some naturopath etc. I'm distraught at the way some Alternate medicine experts are personifying themselves as 'professionals'. The scenario in a country like India is far more alarming where hordes of 'quacks' or charlatans , mislead the hoi polloi, or the gullible minds by prefixing "Dr" before their Surnames. They take people for ride, charging exorbitantly ,by prescribing some pop-up pills or placebos . They would recommend some intricate "Yogic Asanas" ,awkward and unwielding postures, administring steroids in the name of herbal tonics and aphrodisiacs,as a sure-shot cure for incurable ailments.Of late a new-age fad of "Wellbeing Doctors" is coming up thick and fast in this muddle of quackery and medico-conmanship.We fall a prey to such tricksters. Many such sadhus and clerics are romping the roost through 'faith healing' and other mystifying mumbo-jumbos.
Sandy, New Delhi, India
Interesting, technically, medical doctors are not truly 'Dr'; 'Doctor' is their job, not their academic qualification, this being restricted to PhDs et al. Apparently Dentists are now permitted to use the title 'Dr', even though they generally have (only) a BDS, which is a 'first degree'.
Philip Sidaway, London,
I recently went to a debate on parenting where someone (a midwife, I think) pointed out that in the eyes of the state, children don't have parents they have "risk factors". But perhaps India would be more cheered by my dad's old adage that an expert is never right where you or I would be wrong, but is wrong for more expensive reasons.
Liz Bailey, London, UK
Hang about, India, me old love! Isn't this inspection of excrement being aired on a Channel Four programme? Doesn't that tell you something? From the Big Brother mob, and you're surprised? Channel Four ought to be renamed the Gilbert and George Channel. Then it would all kind of make sense. I stopped watching after Kirstie and Phil returned for yet another interminable hour of flirtatious behaviour between a lady and her gamekeeper. Gets on your wick after a while.
Mike Mitchell, Spalding, England
Perhaps I'll write a book on how to be an expert. There's a TV programme in that, too, I reckon. I could become the guru of choice for all those people who want to be gurus. Perhaps the government will give me a job as a tsar. The expert tsar. The how-to-be-an-guru tsar. The how-to-be-a-tsar tsar. I might get called up by the <i>Today</i> programme as an expert on expertese and be interviewed by John Humphrys. I mean, when they're short of someone to interview, there's always Dr Cornelius Pingblat of the University of West Little Piddlebed to tell us about experts. And gurus. I detest experts. Not experts themselves, you understand, but the whole concept of experts. No one is introduced by his or her credentials any more - just as 'an expert in ...' Or it's 'Experts say that ...' How did we ever manage without experts? Is there an expert out there who can tell me?
Andy A, West Wales, United Kingdom