Hi Jeremy
I love your top gears, so it is not astonishing for me that you have ther correct aproach to suspenders and stockings. Suffering about the lost pleasures in Vienna.
Thomas
A lawyer driving a Cobra he built out of all kinds of cars

Dr. Thomas Lederer, Vieanna, Austria

Jeremy, I could not have put it better myself.

Now it seems there are many ladies out there looking for a "decent" all day wearing suspender belt. Not bedroom wear, real suspenders. Which I rekon are in any case sexier than bedroom wear stuff.

Here's a link to a good selection of suspenders. http://www.secretsinlace.com/category/17

My wife wears these when she needs to stop me droning on about stockings, we even go out to theatres with her wearing them. I prefer the six strap type myself. Keeps me quiet for about 12 hours after an outing, before I start up on the theme again.

Have a good look around the shape salon section.

Last up ladies if you want to give your man a real treat go to Ebay USA and buy some genuine vintage stockings, Hanes are the best but Triumph are good too and be sure to try some seamed fully fashioned stockings with the "keyhole" at the top of the seam. The modern look alikes do not cut the mustard.

Tom Perth Australia, ex Portsmouth UK

Tom Barrett, Perth, Western Australia

James May is spoken for, apparently. (darnit!!)

I'd be happy to wear stockings but finding a good and pretty suspender belt is very difficult. Anyway, I don't see the harm in spoiling the boyfriend (if I had one!!) to stockings - it is no different to wearing a gorgeous bra you know they'll like. :-)

Limey, DUBLIN,

Corsets work oh so much better my dear Jeremy. It is easier to get a man to do whatever you want when he is drooling and mesmerised by a substantial cleavage accented by a small laced waist. The stockings and suspenders come later.

Michaela, Sydney, Australia

Jeremy, I am your woman!!! To see you speechless would be priceless, so if all I had to do was slide on a pair of black, sheer stockings with a gorgeous lacy black suspender belt, I would so do it! My price? A picture of your jaw hitting the floor!

Nicola, Dartford, England

One company that is trying to get stockings back on people's legs for charity is:- www.tightsplease.co.uk/charity

Mike Joiner, London,

You good Jeremy, you good. Like Borat said: "I like you, I like sex, it's niiiiiiice!!!!"

And if I can say something, even if I do not deserve it, the english woman are the best in the world. Honest.

GAETANO PELLEGRINI, Slough, England

One site that is trying to get people to wear stockings for charity is www.tightsplease.co.uk/charity

Mike Joiner, London,

The girls at my High School used to wear stockings havent seen them since. Crying shame, totally agree that sliver of skin is messmerising.

Ben, New Zealnad,

I say let em eat cake!
Thanks Jeremy

Ethel Merkin, Dallas, Texas

Loved your books-agree with your views-great article on stockings-will buy your next book and the Times .

phil, manchester, uk

When Francis Bacon stated, "knowledge is power", he had probably thought better of his first words and crossed out "stockings are" first.

(Sighs) I honestly wish women wouldn't wear stockings. A glimpse of stocking top quickens the pulse, invades the mind and returrns me to blushing teenage awkwardness. And I'm 32, and an otherwise articulate, modern senior manager. In an important meeting. I'm not a letch, was brought up in a house with feminist literature on the shelves and exercise every aspect of being a modern gentlemen assiduously. -Men need to make an effort too. Otherwise we end up looking like an overweight motoring personality.

Its almost painful, if it wasn't so profoundly fabulous too. So don't wear them, no, do, no ...don't. But please do. Arrggghh.

In fact don't. Its the rarity which makes a 'sighting' memorable.

Bongo Postlethwaite, Somewhere in darkest Kent ,

Dear Sir,

Thank you very much for your work here. I can't speak for anyone but myself and I've been wearing gartered stockings for 45 years. I started when I was 12 and at 57 I still wear them. I won't ask anyone to agree or disagree with what I say. This is just me and how I feel. I love the way stockings look and feel. To me it's part of being a lady. I'm my own person and it's up to me to keep myself happy. I care not for trends and keeping up with fashion. I would never bow to change just to fit in. It takes a strong and confident woman to wear gartered hosiery these days. A woman that could care less about what other people or fashion think or say. Who the heck wants to go through life being a people pleaser? I won't let what I could have or should have done ever take control of my life. I'll stick with garters and stockings and let the want to be people stay miserable being concerned about what other people think. Thank you Jeremy!

Susan, Chicago, USA Illinois

Right on JC regarding stockings

The trouble is that nobody takes any noticeof what you say and in fact do the absolute opposite. You say a Ferrari is great and then everyone buys a Lada.
What about an artical saying how great tights are.. then mankind might be in luck!

Bazzer, Chelmsford,

For all you girls looking for great suspender belts - have you been fortunate enough to discover Boudoir by Elle Macpherson Intimates? Its a new collection available in Selfridges, John Lewis, Harrods etc. They have got some fantasic lingerie including great suspender belts, check them out, you won't be disappointed. Loved the article Jeremy.

Cheryl, Newcastle Upon Tyne, UK

Absolutely agree with Jeremy, it has nothing to do with sexism or anything like that. Stockings and suspenders are sexy, feminine and more "accesible" than hideous tights. There is no better sight than a gorgeous pair of stocking encased legs, my wife wears them and has done for years. She says they make her feel special and sexy, no-one knows she's wearing them apart from ourselves and also they are far more hygenic than tights are. Just look at what a pair of tights look like over a bank robbers face!!

Kevin, Salisbury, Wiltshire

Personally as a younger woman I seldom wear trouser suits and only occasionally go bare legs. I do wear tights but also own both four strap and six strap suspender belts and wear stockings fairly regularly. I get a lovely warm girly feeling when I do and I think women not wearing at least occasionally are missing a lot. I first wore stockings at 19yo when at uni and loved them from the first time I put them on. My parner also likes me to wear them!! Recently I wore seams for the first time and found them even more fantastic. Glances from males I see every day were lovely and some even commented. Girls do try stockings they are fantastic and with a good suspender belt not uncomfortable in the slightist!!

Kara Darcy-Le Page, Royston, Herts

I am 24 yo and wear hosiery most days and only occasionally trouser suits. Recently I wore seams for the first time and they made ME feel great, the glances from males I see every day were out of this world and my partner was over the moon. Stockings are fabulous to wear and are so smart I feel with either business suits or casual . I wore my first pair when I was 19 at uni and they felt right from the start Seams felt even better and made me feel 'different'. So girls give them a try Jeremy is right!

Kara Darcy-Le Page, Royston, Herts

In my opinion,in my country,the girls can do more in these days than before,and the state of women is more important .We needn't stay at home, while we have as much rights as men have in the society.So ,why not?

Ou Weiping, Xi'an, CHINA

Rodd liddle done the best article on Shambo, Sacred Bull.
Fantastically written, showing the corrupt and intransigent
goings on in Welsh life. THe welsh Assemblys 'heavy handed'
approach. Great analogy and food for thought relating to the question whether if muslims reared bulls. Still, saying all this
Rod's attitude to the disabled has got to improve and if I ever see him around I will most certainly discipline him about this.

Bob Innes, Carmarthen,

The queue for James May is very long and I suggest you get to the back of it at once Mr Clarkson........

Jenny Baldock, York, North Yorks

Fantastic article that I could not agree more on and this is only part of why women should wear stockings. It tears me up, I live in the US and and only see (and I am not exaggerating) when I say, I only see 1 in 500 women in stockings these days. A terrible tragedy for mankind. I know it has made me look at women in an entirely different way. Very dissapointing.

Joe L., Dover, Delaware

Well done Jeremy, straight to the point as usual. I think the stocking issue is only part of it though. It's the overall appearance that matters. Women, when they dress, make a statement about themselves. What, for instance, makes a grossly overweight woman dye her hair orange and black, expose an overhanging belly button embellished with navel rings, cover herself in garish tattoos, including a big skull and crossbones on one of her breasts, and paint her toenails all different colours. Maybe she thought it would make men look at her. Well, she got that right.

Roy, Trowbridge, Wiltshire

How pleasing to see Clarkson turn his viscerating wit onto a subject that has long bothered me. Sexual equality is a great thing, but I have never quite understood why so many modern career women seem to think that you need to dress like men in order to compete with them. When it comes to dressing for respect in the workplace, my vote goes to the lady in the smart skirt suit and hosiery over the one in the androgynous trouser suit every time. As for the stockings business, well as the old saying goes "There are two types of women, those who like stockings and those who consider them too racy. However, there is only one type of man, those who like stockings". Quite so, but in my view even tights are a much lesser evil than the dreaded trousers!

PaulH, Vancouver, Canada

Bill Armstrong is right about the 'muffin tops' and in the U.S. it is no different. (We women also find it appalling.) But, PLEASE, men of the world, ladies don't find the male butt-crack especially endearing, either! It makes the man look like he's got a load in his saggy diaper! Wear a flipping belt, pull it snug, or at least wear a t-shirt that hangs to your knees!

Ulrike Neitch, Milwaukie, Oregon, USA

Maggie from Nottingham - finally someone who understands the problem. All my friends have converted to tights/leggings/footless tights (question - what is the difference between footless tights and leggings?) so don't understand my quest for a suspender belt that doesn't require hoiking up every five minutes! I am told that you can get them over the internet, but when it comes to my lingerie I prefer to look and feel the quality of a product before I buy. I think we should get Jeremy to campaign on our behalf. What do you say Jeremy - bring back the suspender belt!

Emily, London, UK

I can't imagine why it takes Jeremy so long to undo his suspender belt. Unless he only wears it at weekends and just needs a bit more practice.

eric campbell, harrogate, uk

Worrying about stockings and tights, Jeremy? I wish I was lucky enough to see some women wearing skirts at all - it all seems to be scruffy jeans or other horrible-looking trousers.

Women really don't make the effort any more. Tell them men prefer skirts/stockings and it's sexist - but women can tell us what to wear and how to smarten our appearance to the last detail.

Duncan McAlister, Ayr, UK

I agree whole-heartedly with Emily from London. Trying to find a decent suspender belt (or even any suspender belt) is nigh-on impossible. Trudging around every possible lingerie shop known to woman and still coming out empty handed is guaranteed to make you wonder why the heck you bothered!
To all lingerie retailers....lets have some decent suspenders!!!

Maggie, Nottingham,

On the contrary, stockings (in the context in which you are discussing them) DO make us sex objects - but what's wrong with that? It's still a man's world and we women need all the weapons we can lay our hands on.

Paula, Belfast,

Jeremy---Top Man Right on the money!!
Time to raise your game, and your eye-level now and comment upon the phenomenon of "Muffin-Tops"---those APPALLING females who insist on showing a spare tyre naked ovehanging a pair of jeans!!!! Yikes after you with the Sick Bag , mate!""

Bill Armstrong, Harrogate, England

I've always worn stockings or tights and cannot understand why women today do not. Every man I've ever known has preferred a woman in stockings. My current very much younger paramour won't even consider a woman who won't wear them. And have you ever gotten a whiff of a woman's stocking-less foot once she kicks off her shoes? Disgusting!

Cheryl, Birmingham, USA

Jeremy, I would love to make you (and many other men no doubt) very happy and wear my lovely stockings - the only problem is finding a decent suspender belt! The ones stocked in stores all seem to be of the flimsy type which are only meant to stay on for the short length of time between revealing all and jumping into bed. What's a girl to do? I suggest you launch a campaign to bring back proper suspender belts - even trusty M&S don't stock them any more!

Emily, London, UK

Boys will be Boys, I suppose!

What really interests me, Is james on the market, then?
Plenty of us out there ready, willing and very up for a spot of james 'appreciation' also willing to provide own stockings etc.

Eat your heart out, Clarkson!!!

happygirl, midlands,

I can remember a Golden Age - it lasted about 6 months - when the mini-skirt had been invented and tights hadn't. I think it was 1963. Tough luck Jez.

Ken Leyland, Liverpool, U.K.

Good work Clarkson. It's about time women realised that their perceived imperfections can easily be completely hidden by stockings and suspenders.

Ladies, don't waste time with fad diets and personal trainers, just get some stockings and suspenders and blokes won't care. Women spend loads of time straightening their hair in the morning and blokes barely notice - just use that time to put on the stockings and suspenders - a much better use of your time.

John , London,

To Dick, MK - I'll have the soup, some of us think the idea of James May in stockings is a perfectly wonderful image!

Becky, London,

Yup thats right, 'No man fancies a girl if she is gangrenous'. But let me tell you this, 'No woman fancies a guy who is hunch back' so guys you tell us what are you going to do for us similar to a pair of stockings???

mallika, GLEN ALLEN, VA

Just read an account of a young women being propositioned by Frank Sinatra-- she decided to go along until he came out of the loo wearing stockings (men's socks, whatever you call them) and suspenders. She laughed so hard that the moment was ruined; he stomped out and she never did sleep with Sinatra, whomever's loss that was.

Also if you think women together can't be crude you've never heard some of us-- you'd stagger out pale and gasping.

As for a classic stocking scene: "It Happened One Night", when Clark Gable fails in repeated attempts to hitch a ride, but Claudette Colbert gets one immediately by showing a bit of stocking.

Tina Rhea, Greenbelt , Maryland US

So men, 50-year-old in stockings or 20-year-old in tights or worse footless tights?

Lala, London,

Look; point is, Jeremy is right on the money; Spitfire - top plane (classic), McQueens Mustang - top blokes car (classic), McQueen himself! top womans man (classic), Muhamed Ali - Top- Boxer (classic), Lauren Bacall - top woman - (classic), Captain Slow - top entertainment (classic), a great pair of pins in Stockings and Suspenders; yep- CLASSIC!!
And who mention stilleto shoes to make up the set? No one! (you're slipping, Jerry, old boy)! Tch! Classic!!

John Palfrey, Harrogate, North Yorkshire

A girl worth desiring and loving is entirely desirable and loveable with gangrene.

Harold Kistner, St. Louis, Missouri

Jeremy,

I'm 22 & wear stockings every day. It takes me 5 minutes to put my stockings on in the morning, 4 to pick a pair, choose a suspender belt & underwear then 1 minute (probably less) to put them on. Not only are they comfortable & practical for every day wear but there is nothing like wearing a pair of RHT's or FF's for a special occasion, or just to cheer yourself up after a bad week at work!

Sam Miller, Whitehaven, Cumbria

Footless tights - I'd rather shoot myself than wear anything like that. Completely pointless. Fine if you have legs like two twigs, lousy if you haven't,

Tights - Well, they are good for some things. Like a hairband when you're trying to do your eyebrows or makeup.

Stockings and suspenders, everytime. They don't take three hours to put on if you do it right. And there's no gymnastics or yoga involved with puting them on as with tights.Also there are no nasty problems 'downstairs', either. Just fresh air circulation. Perfect.

And finally, James May is NOT that bad-looking. Really! Although, please keep him out of stockings. He's much better in those high neck cable knit sweaters that make him look like a submarine captain.

Mich, Abergavenny, South Wales

Jeans. Sorry! I'm afraid I'm not out to charm the gents. I only wear skirts when it's really warm (so no stockings or tights), and when I don't have to bike anywhere.

starling, Lancaster,

*** but we can't all spend fifteen minutes hopping around on the bedroom carpet, trying to clip the bloody things on ***
Sit on the edge of the bed or on a chair. Six suspenders should take a maximun of two minutes to fix up. Make sure the suspenders have metal clasps for best grip. Those plastic ones don't grip well enough.

Don't confuse proper suspender belts made for all-day wear, with the cheap tat sold purely as bedroom wear and taken off within 10 minutes of putting on.

cath, Leeds,

The only thing more powerful than the force that stockings exert on men is the force of hate they draw from the footless tights brigade when they notice that you're letting down the side.

siani evans, hawick,

Yes! A lady in stockings.There is no better look.

Erik, Umea, Sweden

Well thanks you guys!!!! Thanks a bunch!! There I was happily reading , and chuckling to, JC's rant about women and stockings and things whilst eating a hearty bowl of soup. Then some oik brings up the thought of James May in stockings!!!! Not a nice thought at all. Anybody want half a bowl of free soup?

That said I totally agree with JC's comments about stockings etc. I'd rather see a nice clean girl semi dressed than showing all she had to show, or worse, velour joggers and matted fluffy slippers... Waynetta Slob eat your heart out!!

Dick, MK,

Jeremy: stop giving away our trade secrets, it's ungentlemanly.

Josette, Lafayette, IN, USA

Hold ups - you have to get the right ones - Actually tesco lace tops are good - they stay up for a start - its so embarrasing trying to teach holding your thighs. And they look lovely - they are not tight so dont leave a ring around the top of the leg.

Suspenders - such a pain. Talk about visable panty line - visable sussy line is so wrong.

Tights - who ever invented tights should be shot - just after the person who invented footless tights.

As for BIG knickers - i dont care how old i am - i cant do big draws.

So JC -you may be a MCP - but you have taste when it comes to womens underwear!

Dizz, Bognor Regis, England

So this sleeping with James May thing...

How long would it take for you to sleep with him, and would it help if he was wearing stockings at the time?

Ms Katonic, London,

Men will sleep with anything!! Women dont get all excited thinking that you are something special. You just happen to be there at the right place (or wrong) at the right (or wrong) time. Sex has got nothing to do with love, care, commitment, lifelong planning, even attraction!! But now, women will also sleep with anything so men dont get all excited either. Why do you think STDs are so rampant? Imagine if your parents dont even know each other!! And that is exactly what is happening in today's promiscous world where having sex with someone you do not even know, recognise the next day or even remember what happened is the norm. Not only are we destroying the animal world, environment, we are also destroying ourselves by not using the brain we have been given. God help us!!

mia, Brisbane, Australia

Well Said Jeremy; I could not agree more.

Dirk Ovenstone, Rickmansworth,

one of your MOST politically incorrect articles for a long time. And oh, so much the better for it!

Tony Edwards, Crook, Co. Durham

Funnily enough I was just looking at my suspender belts the other day and wondering whether to throw them away. I didn't so if you fancy popping around Jeremy and having a look feel free. By the way, I quite fancy a little flat in London.

Jan A, Kent , Kent ,

So, what was the conclusion? If you were the last twenty people on earth, how long WOULD it take before one of you slept with James May?

Beckstar, Witney, Oxfordshire, UK

HAHAHAHA ! Very funny!!!!

Eva, Washington, Washington

Crikey, Jeremy, you seem aggitated with the state of ladies undergarments. Would you like to offer advice on the best bras and 'tummy tucker' knickers? Stockings are a nightmare. You stress that they stay in place, don't ladder or snap when you 're at work , in my case, infront of a class. Now, that wouldn't be good!

MsS, Durham,

thank the lord! someone out there still likes stockings!!

as a 15 year old, I must admit that wearing stockings gets me a few odd looks in the street, but I will prevail!!

And I wholehearteedly agree with the comment on pop socks, and offer to lend you my fathers hunting rifle for the job :)

Freckles, Seaham,

Awesome piece! And so true. Damn, ladies... bring the sexy back! We'll do whatever you want!

Keith Sparbanie, West Alexander, PA, USA

They're very erotic and sexy and have their place. If they're not appreciated then they won't be worn.
Apparently some men are threatened by them. Goodness knows why, scared of having to perform or something. We don't need men like that..

Of course like everything else it's mutual - you buy really good suits and shoes and treat women nicely and never ever get fat and we will do likewise.

Supermother, London,

Jeremy dear, you are utterly mistaken, if you think women don't know what men are like as soon as there are alone for a certain amount of time. The truth is, women are no better when they are amongst themselves. Different, yes, but no better.

There are various reasons for not wearing stockings, I personally don't like the feeling of squashing my legs in something that tight.

I absolutely agree with you about the effect, though, when my girlfriend chooses to wear stocking it puts me into a sort of zombie like state. All higher brain functions cease, and she could get me to do pretty much anything. A pretty girl in stockings and a suspender belt is a glorious sight, there's no denying that.

As for the 'How long it'd take for one of you to sleep with James May' question, I think that would make a rather interesting new Top Gear challenge.

Margot, Bremen, Germany

Women do look great in stockings, yes, but we can't all spend fifteen minutes hopping around on the bedroom carpet, trying to clip the bloody things on and eventually swearing when we step on the end, trip over the cat and have to buy a new pair (and a new cat, if the fall's been an unlucky one), all in order to make us potentially more attractive.

Moony, Norwich,

I think you'd have a better chance of getting men to wear suspenders. I'm sure that in more than a few cases, the men will look quite fetching, as they can have quite nice legs. And then you can discuss how long it'd take for you to sleep with them.

DTL, Groninen, The Netherlands

I intended to comment on this column but then you mentioned sleeping with James May - however obtuse the context - and I had to have a bit of a moment...

Anyway, I'm sorry that stockings have gone out of fashion (personally I'm 27 and I own a suspender belt) but so has doffing ones hat to a lady, brylcream, wearing a suit to the pub and having manners and I'm afraid you're just going to have to cope.

As for women complaining that stockings make us sex objects... well, isn't that the point? Women don't need to wear constricting underwear to make men do what we want, all we need is to offer the possibility of sex.

And I hate to break it to you Jeremy honey, but women know what men do when we're not around. The real secret is what we do when men aren't there - and I'll give you a clue - it's not shopping for stockings.

Suggsygirl, Worthing, West Sussex