Teaching students how to cook is, as wonderful as the idea may be in someone's mind, more wasted time in the classroom. What the teachers should be teaching is proper nutrition and couple that with proper exercise in physical education classes, then the population would be healthier than it is now.

Also, in schools, we must get back to teaching the basics: reading, writing and arithmetic. Surely these "basic" skills are more important than cooking and will bring you farther in life than learning how to weld. If you want to learn how to do specific trade tasks, do that at a specific trade school or on your own time. The basics of reading, writing and arithmetic, along with history, science, foreign language and art/music/theatre are what should be taught in schools.

Parents, as one of my teachers used to say, "Wake up and smell the coffee!" It's high time parents took responsibility and did their part in raising their child and let teachers get on with their job.

Brent, Rhode Island, USA

Most of what I was taught at school has proved a complete waste of time.Since leaving in 1964,I've never been asked to once to compare and contrast Disraeli with Gladstone,nor to calculate the height of a church spire using geometry,nor have I ever needed to use the practical skills we learnt like dovetail joints or a "t" halving joint. I've never found myself in a room ,with known dimensions,where water is entering at so many gallons per hour,and having to calculate when it will be totally flooded if I am able to use a bucket that holds so many litres.Just what good spending hours learning how to draw a map of the Great Lakes and the polders of Holland did I don't know either.I also consider that time totally wasted,along with the entire time at school.

Mike, Dunstable, England

Sorry Jeremy, wrong. All the things you suggest in this column are the responsibility of the parent. Your mother should teach you how to carve lamb and your farther should teach you how to fix a car. School teaches you enough things to get a job and afford your own kitchen and car.

MW, Hook, England

I've never learnt to weld, but I use my Latin every week and am eternally grateful for it.

Paula Hill, Montreux, Switzerland

Being a dumb (according to Jeremy) Yank, what is Trex????

Richard, Granite Bay, Calif, USA

Damn right once again Jezza. I went to a lovely grammar school in the home counties and the only thing I can remember is the first 15 minutes of each Latin lesson was spent doing the Times crossword as a class!

Russ, Melbourne, Victoria

Aren't these the skills your parents are supposed to teach you? It's time spent with members of the previous generation for who you have respect that leads to well rounded children. It's a school they are teachers, not a care centre. Parents need to take responsibility for some of their children's up bringing.

MM, sydney,

At a Comp school in NW England I learned (over various years):

Maths, physics, chemistry, English lang, Eng lit, French, German, Latin, geography, history, art, music, local studies, technical drawing, woodwork, metalwork, cookery, games, I also benefited from cello lessons from peripatetic music teacher, county choir and orchestra and the Duke of Edinburgh Award Scheme.

Phew. This was all pre-new curriculum and admittedly the school was an ex-Grammar school now repackaged to take allcomers, but still it was still varied learning which was well appreciated. I'd have hated to be pinned down to small focus at an early age, maybe there are some who know at the age of 11 that they wish to weld for their remaining liveable span but I am grateful I could hold off on the yawning inevitability of adult life for a while.

30-something, Leeds,

When he is not out of his depth Clarkson is great. But the word 'specious' was obviously invented to describe what he does and while his comic genius just has to be applauded, I can't understand why people give his wondrously amusing drivel such creedence. After even the most cursory examination of Jeremy's thesis, it seems obvious that our favourite sultan of the simile, would hardly have his present facility for bathos, if he had spent his school-years learning practical skills rather than history, english and philosophy (the comic's crib). More worryingly, for those who fail to spot his obvious worship of Marxism (the brothers), his febrile rantings offer poor advice and guidance to those hoping to emulate this star sceptic's material success and celebrity.
As Jeremy found out at his school and which has subsequently been confirmed by his own success, the more useless the skill the better it is rewarded.
So forget boiler-mending, go for high added-value tosh, like our Jez.

Destry Jones, Birmingham,

Jeremy,

you are right on this one, but we have a system that is simply wrong , you know it, I know it, everyone does, but no one does anything about it, we have kids coming out of school that do not have a clue to the real world, and unfortunetly when they get employed they have to be re educated ...as for the basics...changing a spark plug...no chance!, basic principles have been lost, we should be ashamed of the way we introduce our children into the real world, and then we wonder and complain why they struggle.!!

scott mitchell, Glasgow, Scotland

I don't know, Jeremy - surely these 'vocational' skills (which used to be the things that mums and dads could just do) are more a matter of initiative and persistence than formal education. Speaking as one who has mastered Latin and does all the welding work on my cars, I would say the latter is much easier to pick up in a couple of afternoons, and the former is a superb grounding for the major European languages that necessarily takes a long time to use. I also use algebra on a daily basis - cookery too of course, though I was lucky enough to be taught the basics at primary school and home.

And I hate to gloat but we had current affairs discussions on a weekly basis too - but then I did go to a Grammar School.....

Adam Neilson, Birmingham,

I thought school was for learning:
how to pull members of the opposite sex,
how to inhale fags without wretching,
the rudimentaries of sexual reproduction from other equally ill informed teenagers,
how to belittle anyone with slightly fewer braincells,
how to be surly & rude towards all those in authority, learn how to waste days and months of life in a state of utter boredom (ideal training for work!).
Had no idea that school was supposed to be educational - what an extraordinary concept.!
So given that the current adult generation know zilch, great idea to teach the next generation something vaguely useful. Might stop them all from being porkers too!

Fiona, Ascot, UK

Spot on Clarkson. I had to do latin and Irish Gaelic at my Northern Irish Grammar school and it was worthless. At uni I could barely grill a sausage and was all at sea when it came to changing a light-bulb. It is about time education had some relevance to the real world and the lack of discussing current affairs is yet another gaping chasm in the system.

Tom Hughes, Baldock, Hertfordshire

Actually, Jeremy, Caesar's table would have been declined, not conjugated!
Ergo, my years of Latin at school were not wasted if I can still tell the difference between a cheerful conjugation and a dismal declension.

Jarek, Houston, Texas

I agree with Jeremy. I am disgusted how much crap the so called education system is feeding to the young generation. Nobody even bothers to ask the youngsters what they want. They start life handicaped to think "correct". They are brainwashed by people who have no idea about real life. It's so easy to deal with idiot, helpless adults. Otherwise who would vote for Hillary, Chavez & Co? Or who would be ashamed to be normal. It is a production of fake, useless,human beings. It's up to us to tell children the truth. Stop being afraid stop ,the nonsense of politically correctness, be yourself and make your children free. Dogma produced by others is not compulsory it's not freedom. You do love your children I hope!

George Dragan, Timisoara, Romania

I like Jeremy Clarkson. However, that said, I now hope the next helicopter Jeremy flies in was designed by someone who can cook a good rhubarb crumble!

Here we have someone that (I assume from the article) was taught all the "wrong" things. He is writing for the Sunday Times, driving Ferraris and Veyrons, has probably amassed an enviable fortune and believes that he would have been better off learning how to weld. Yes, I bet the nation's welders must be thanking their lucky stars right now!

Everyone in the country (of sufficient ability) should have the chance to achieve what Jeremy has (without the necessity to behave like a freak on a reality show). Perhaps, if more people were taught to understand Shakespeare and Socrates then that would be a start. “There is a tide in the affairs of men which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; omitted, all the voyage of their life is spent in shallows and in miseries…or welding!”

Kellett, Nassau,

I live in Wales where all children must learn Welsh, sounds good till you realise that even the majority of our Welsh friends beleive this to be a complete waste of time.The time spent on this could surely be put to better use in several ways.
You may as well teach them Latin or some other ancient language. Its a nonsense just like the ridiculous road signs.

Owain Glyndor, Pen Y Bont, Cymru

Great idea. While we're talking, how about adding some basic accounting skills? Knowing how credit cards work and how to balance a cheque book are simple, everyday skills that could help keep the next generation out of debt, yet most kids leave school knowing nothing about how to manage their finances.

Oh God, I'm turning into my father. I keep having to fight the urge to say "bring back National Service!" Although...

Chris H, Bristol, UK

im going back to complete my latin a level and hopefully study classics at oxford or cambridge. Im starting to value 'qualifications' but what qualification you should aim for depends on you as a person. welding is no use to some one wanting to be prime minister but equally latin is pointless for an inner city yooouuth wanting to get 'manual.' Diversity is the key to a fruitful society.

Jeremy, Cheltenham, England

Is Jeremy related to Simon Cowell? They look alike (sort of) and seem to share the same mannerisms, ways of speaking, bluntness etc - are they cousins from the same corner of the north?

Apologies if this has been asked and answered before.

Father Ignatius Brown, London, UK

As the man said, Education is what remains when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Frank Upton, Solihull,

I went to one of the 'best' Grammar Schools in London and from there to University. Result: I can sometimes complete the Times crossword. Other than that, none of it has been of the slightest practical use to me.
Oh, except once. I was attempting said crossword on a bus and got chatted up by a young lady who said she liked 'clever' men. So I got a leg-over. Does that count?

colin, london, england

What about a tiny bit of advice on money management too? I met a couple I'd been at univ. with who had a £10000 credit card bill and £12000 in the bank, who wondered should they use some savings to clear the bill? -But what if we had an emergency? -You have an emergency.

neil, waterford, ireland

When I was a kid back in the 1970s in rual east anglia both boys and girls had a weekly dose of what was called Home Economics....basically cooking.

Aged between 9 & 11 we cooked something once a week in a classroom containing lots of cookers and ovens.

My poor parents had 2 years of eating the various concotions / cakes we created.

No suprise I have always been quite good at cooking as I have a rough idea of what ingredients fit together to make a good and tasty meal.

Although I must admit fish and chips is tempting when the fridge is a bit empty.

Joe

Joe, Sydney, Australia

Was there ever a greater Oxymoron than 'Comprehensive Education"!!

Bruce, London, UK

can you add putting a new tyre on a bicycle and adjusting the gears .. 5 males over 25 in this household and only the one over 50 has a clue!

YR, Ely, UK

Unfortunately I have to agree with Jeremy. School at times felt more like an adolescent battleground than a place of learning and was largely a waste of time. University was far better but ultimately you (and your parents) are responsible for your education.

David Lea-Smith, Edinburgh, U.K.

The school syllabus is based on what Plato thought a gentleman entering Athenian political life might need to now. The same subjects were thought appropriate at public schools where the kids would be expected to enter the civil service, academia or a profession such as law or medicine. State schools offer a feeble copy of the public school education.

As Fr. Brown (above) suggests, a kid who can read proficiently can learn anything they need. This should be the focus but also, as Yorkielass said, Personal Finance. I would suggest most subjects can be taught practically: personal finance (maths), cookery / nutrition, First Aid, medicine (biology), electrics, mechanics (physics and advanced maths).

And it wouldn't hurt to learn how to put up a shelf or build a flatpack cupboard!

BB, London, UK

fabulous once again jezza. i love reading your comments every week.
i am currently 16 and as of this june shall be sitting down in a crowded hall writing down facts about nazi germany, coastal erosion, poetry from across time, the fact that force = mass x acceleration and that the periodic table looks how it does today becuase a scientist decided to make it so 100 odd years ago (not in the same test obviously, that would be weird). but so what? ' so you can get good letters on a piece of paper and be successful in life' bull. if i want to be successful in life those letters will be of no use. being able to look after my finances though, understanding how the government can affect my life, being able to feed my self with healthy, well those are things that will be far more relevant that being able to point out that i know how to solve a simultaneous equation at A* level.

Rob Micklewright, Bookham, England

I remember being brilliant in art at school and when the careers's man saw this immediately said "what about painting and decorating?". I compromised later when my mum sent me for a job as a printer at the local newspaper. Needless to say we are all the victims of missed opportunities and bad advice so here I am at 59 taling a degree level qualification in Advice and Guidance.

Phil, Richmond, North Yorkshire

Having been through an all boys comprehensive school system in Coventry in the 70s. When we had a car industry. I remember how we used to laugh at the thick kids who had to take “bricklaying “while the us smarter boys took engineering. The result I can read a micrometer, a skill I have found useful. I haven’t used a lathe or shaper much in the intervening years but at least a had the basics. As for the algebra and 90% of the math I struggled over, never used it, but I wish I had learned to lay bricks. I never wanted to be a brick layer. However I do own a house that I have completely renovated exert for paying a bricky to redo the chimney and the repointing and some of the basement block work........A Brit in Canada

A Brit, Hamilton, Canada

Speaking as an ex-pat teaching in Hungary I have to agree 100% with Jeremy, over here they're obsessed with learning mindless stuff from books with no practical work at all.
I was trying to explain to some of my students the other day that I learned woodwork, metalwork and cookery at school. They thought it was stupid until I pointed out how much I'd saved making some new shelf units in my daughters room and the fact my wife loves to sometimes put her feet up and let me destroy the kitchen (I always clean up after myself).
I think the curriculum does need to be addressed and we need more practicality and less BS! I'm now off to put up some shelves in the kitchen and wire the plug for the new telly in there, and I learned it all at school!

Mark, Pécs, Hungary

Lets face it, the Labour government in Britain is so full of sycophants that the only way to ensure your child gets a decent education is to do it yourself. Sure, send them to school, bonding is important to a child, but do not put your kids development in the hands of the idiots who make all the rules. It is foolish to have any faith in these people, very few of them send their children to state schools for the simple reason that they have no faith in the system they themselves control. If you feel a certain aspect of learning is useful, take the time to educate your child in it, you can be sure that if you allow the state to educate they could end up idealogically skewed.

Mark Anderson, Manchester, England

the day has finally arrived when i can say with an open heart ' jeremy clarkson has mad sense '!!!

david c, purbeck,

High school kids in the USA take driver education. It's compulsory for getting a driver's license if you're under the age of 18. They also take various electives like cooking, wood shop, metal shop, auto shop, and sewing, in addition to the mandated core curriculum. Then we have community colleges that teach high school graduates such necessary skills as plumbing, wiring, construction, auto mechanics, and so on. Young people ages 17-20 make up the majority of community college students, although the colleges are nearly free and are open to all citizens and permanent residents.

I'm sorry (but not surprised) that Mr. Clarkson never mastered plane or solid geometry, but trust me when I say that knowledge of that sort is absolutely vital in building automobiles-- as are physics, chemistry, algebra, calculus and trigonometry. All of which are taught in American high schools, and result in airplanes, modern pharmaceuticals, space exploration, modern roads, and high-rise buildings.

MJH, Miami, Florida USA

Schools are good to teach knowleage. Education and values must come from home. If the child live in a troublesome home and never have to opportunity to be a child and is never treated as a child and never learn the principles of civility, then we will get stuck with a heartless, emontionless, rude and ignorante adult don't matter how much knowleage he has. I'll put a chalenge to the readers: Next time you eat with other people, look if the use a spoon to eat solid food and, if they use a fork, look if they use it the proper way. A fork is to be used with the round part down and not up. People that don't value maners are often careless, negligent and disrespectfull. From the moment people believe this things don't matter and that anything goes, then anything goes.

Fabio C, London, UK

When I was at school I wanted to do Technical Drawing and Metalwork. No they said, you are an academic! so you will do Maths Further Maths and Physics. The timetable did not allow it. After becoming an Electronic Design Engineer, and due to a variety of reasons I now teach Computing. In my spare time I love to go to the Metalwork Lab and 'play' with a lathe and bash metal. All of which is self taught, but it took a while. I wish I had been shown how to do it properly, especially when I have two daughters cars which need maintaining. Metal Bashing IS useful, especially when it comes to maintaining yachts.
Matrices and Sines are also useful, I have had to use them many times in my industrial career.
BUT keyboarding skills are essential. At the age of 50+ I still use the two finger poke method of typing, and I use it every day!
I wish I had been taught the skills before learning the wrong way to do it.

Bob G, Truro, Cornwall

Comprehensive education has been one of the biggest failings of society over the last century. We are producing generations of young people who feel life has nothing to offer them because they have been pulled through nationally imposed curriculum's by their ears by successive governments and target obsessed schools. We need to put the focus back on a more holistic approach where skills such as cooking, mechanics, plastering and joinery are given equal status to maths or physics. The governments obsession with University is filling the country with graduates holding useless qualifications. Education should be about helping every child to flourish not some international chase for targets.

Bruce Mcaaw, Grantham,

Now now...lets be fair...girls are for cooking...boys for welding

tom, Cork, Republic of Ireland

Agree entirely. Another excellent dose of common sense.

Vote Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister!

Katherine Birkett, Boston, Lincolnshire,

When will you be Prime Minster Mr Clarkson , your right about most things!

Joanna Barker, Manchester, Lancs

So why aren't you a wielder of pipes instead of words? You might want to thank ol' Jules, out of the barbarian mist of ingratitude, I mean. Redde Caesari quae sunt Caesaris and all that sort of brilliant stuff.

eugene, heidelberg, germany

Kids should be encouraged to do practical lessons (along with the theory). When I was at Upper School, I did Design & Realisation - a mixture of woodwork and metalwork, with a bit of brazing and forge work. I loved it so much, I went into engineering, first as a turner and miller and now in recent years as a Design Engineer after gaining my engineering degree. So from my own personal experience practical work gives you a very good foundation!!!

Nathan Ollett, Bury St Edmunds, England

Many is the time I've wished that I had taken Auto Shop instead of Latin in High School. Rousseau was right when he said that very child should be taught how to earn a living with his hands before we contaminate his mind with books. That way, no matter how many spit-balls life throws at him, he has a way to earn his dailty bread. Such is not always the case with philosophy or even physics.

peter, miami, fl

TOUCH TYPING. Can't think of anything that would be more useful to kids, who are going to spend thousands of hours during their lives twiddling at keyboards - yet, we don't teach it !

Stephen, Huddersfield,

Spot on, as ever except for this bit

"I look back now at those wasted hours in maths lessons, learning about algebra and matrices and sines and I think, what was the point?"

I use algebra and sines (and the others, and Pythagarus (though I can't spell it) and various other maths stuff) reasonably regularly as do thousands of other engineers throughout the world.

Keep it up though.

James, St Annes, UK

Couldn't agree more.

One of the big mistakes of the 20th/21st century is the rise of academia. Sure, a rounded education is a must in today's society but the emphasis on bits of paper and the imperative of a tertiary qualification is insane.

I have long held the belief that jobs thought to be the sole preserve of the graduate (such as the bulk of IT jobs) would be far better served with the candidates taking a City and Guilds apprenticeship rather than a three/four year degree that imparts knowledge to the student that you then have to spend the next 24 months telling them to forget! Far better to get these people out working and learning on the job with the support of the employer and a good technical college. First, they get paid and do not end up in debt and second more resources could be put into those that would benefit from a university placement such as the medical fraternity.

Education is important but more so if it is appropriate.

Bill, Kerry, Ireland

Actually, they do teach current affairs in schools under the heading 'Citizenship'. Which is a fantastically useful subject if taught properly, but if approached by teachers as yet another requirement of the National Curriculum that they don't want to deliver and presented as such, it is a waste. I know from friends of my own age (24) who have just gone into teaching that enthusiasm is the most important characteristic of a teacher. Without that, any subject will be dull and/ or useless. Perhaps a new approach to teaching is required; present it as a job for life, and teachers will get bored and stagnate in later years and pass this on to their pupils. View it, as my friends do, as a job for maybe 10 years max, and people can leave before their enthusiasm runs dry

Sophie, Liverpool,

the only real answer is to home educate - and just let your children play and learn whatever interests them.

My six year old (who learnt to read before she was 3 simply because we read to her a lot) is currently fascinated with King Arthur and the age of Chivalry (great for helping her learn how to behave - and kill dragons), Astronomy (proper science not superstitious astrology twaddle), Animal Husbandry (she's really getting into genetics for the cross-breeding), Self Sufficiency (enjoys reading the book of the same name and planning her small holding).

Not sure where it will end but in the process she is learning to write and draw and gets plenty of fresh air and exercise - she has never watched "Kids TV" (because its crap) and only watches the occasional selective video (classic Disney and Beatrix Potter are favourites). Who needs school - this is so much more fun - you get to be with your children and can juggle work if you are careful.

Father Ignatius Brown, London, UK

I am amazed to hear that cooking classes aren't mandatory. Where I'm from (Canada) we have a class in our first year of high school that consists of four parts: Woodshop, Metal Shop, Sewing, and Home Ec (Mainly cooking). I learned how to use an iron as well as a bandsaw. I wouldn't do it now, but if I had to, I've already got a leg up on people who haven't learned those skills.

Perhaps this is the kind of class your children need?

Jen B, Surrey, BC, Canada,

Isn't this what the average secondary modern taught kids in the 1960's? I'm sure the girls learned the basics of keeping a home - which is why it was called Home Economics and not just cookery!.

Likewise lads were taught basic bricklaying...and even animal husbandry!

You'd have to teach everything to both sexes...but why couldn't it work again? And yes to teaching General Knowledge/ Knowledge of the World..... and what about making 'Managing Your Finances' a crucial part of education too?

Jezza is right.... again!

Yorkielass, York,

Andy in France makes a very good point: the French view of history as presented by teachers (and text books) is more than slightly skewed. I once had to sit there with a straight face while some bumpkin informed me solemnly that we Brits do not celebrate November 11 because we had no troops fighting in the First World War. And don't get me started on the factual inaccuracies that, as Andy says, you spend hours having to correct so your kids don't turn out like that brainless idiot, spouting total rubbish with utter conviction.

Chris Quirke, Epernon, France

I agree, I much prefered the university of real life, work, travel and making mistakes. It scares me to think of all the things they tried to teach me at public school which were of no help in later life.

Big mal, Sydney, Australia

Yes Jeremy .. i totally agree about the current affairs teaching idea ... but you need to be veeeery careful who does the teaching ! .. here in France most teachers in the state system are just a jot short of being communists ... whenever public workers go on strike or on the rare occasion a French government tries to improve the system you can count on the teachers to be the first onto the streets ..... I am forever having to give my kids the other side of the story that employers are not satanic leeches sucking the blood of the downtrodden masses etc etc .... are you really sure you want your kids being tought curent affairs by people with pony tails and ear rings

andy, Lardieres, france

I've argued for car mechanics for years, Jeremy. And why not teach kids to drive? Come to think of it, I can remember joining the police force back in 1963. They taught Civil Defence in those days, because the Russions were going to invade tomorrow. I can remember seeing a film of an atomic bomb followed by a lesson on how to extinguish a fire with a stirrup pump. Somehow, I never quite made the connection.

Roy, Trowbridge, Wiltshire

Oh for heaven's sake Jeremy, who told you that school was about learning anything? It's actually a babysitting service for people who need to go to work.

Judy , Liverpool, england