Magnus Linklater: Holyrood Sketch
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It is a long-standing tradition in detective work that when you are trying to crack a suspect under questioning, you need two interrogators; one to play soft man, one to play hard man. The first appears as a friend, and induces a sense of reassurance. The other closes in for the kill.
Yesterday Alex Salmond faced the combined techniques of a team which gave the old one-two treatment, leaving him distinctly stirred and not a little shaken.
First in, with a line that ran something like: “Listen, chummy, you’ve been a naughty boy, but if you tell us exactly what happened, we’ll see what we can do for you,” was Annabel Goldie, the Tory leader. Now, Ms Goldie is generally held to be a nononsense woman, and Mr Salmond must have felt he was simply going to be given a bit of a dressing down and warned about sharpening up his act.
Gradually, however, it emerged that he was suspected of misdeeds unbecoming to a First Minister, and was being softened up for the kind of treatment more familiar to the CIA than the parliamentary chamber at Holyrood.
Why, Ms Goldie wanted to know, had he met the developers of the multimillion pound Donald Trump golf project in Aberdeen during the critical four-day period leading up to the decision to call in the project, thus circumventing the local council? Was this not contrary to the ministerial code? And could it not be seen as prejudicial to the process?
A bit of squirming now went on. Mr Salmond does not normally squirm, but there was no other word to describe the way he answered. He had already met the objectors to the Trump plan, he said, so as a constituency MSP he was entitled, nay required, to see the other side, too. He had been advised that he was not allowed to say anything about the application. He had followed that“ to the letter. “Can I go now?”, his expression seemed to say.
Not so fast, was the answer. This was not “evenhanded, it was cack-handed,” said Ms Goldie severely. “It was either ignorance or arrogance. Ignorance is not a word with which I associate the First Minister.”
Ouch. It hurt, of course it hurt, but what followed was worse. Nicol Stephen, the Liberal Democrat leader, now stepped into the cell, slammed the door behind him and advanced in menacing style towards the prisoner. Metaphorically whipping the cigarette from between the suspect’s lips, and snatching away the cup of coffee, Mr Stephen asked him: “Were there any Trump representatives in the planner’s office at the time?”
This is the point where, in normal circumstances, you refuse to answer any more questions without your solicitor being present, or alternatively fall back on giving just your name, rank and serial number.
Instead Mr Salmond said: “I wisnae there.” Or rather: “I wasn’t there at the time,” which was not, of course, the question he had been asked. The point, rather, was whether the Trump men had been present when the Executive’s chief planning official was there. Mr Stephen’s eyes narrowed to thin slits of suspicion. This, he snarled, “smells of sleaze.”
In most interrogations, there is that moment when the door slams, the footsteps echo down the corridor, and the prisoner is left, miserably, to wonder what the next session will bring. Will it be the reassuring but vaguely menacing tones of Obergruppenfuehrer Goldie, or the sinister, scarred features of the Gestapo officer Stephen? Time, perhaps, to see whether that escape tunnel is still functioning.

Magnus Linklater's journalistic career spans 40 years, taking him from editor of Londoner's Diary at the Evening Standard to editor of Spectrum and the Colour Magazine at The Sunday Times and editor of The Scotsman. He joined The Times in 1994 and writes a weekly column on Wednesdays. He was chairman of the Scottish Arts Council from 1996 to 2001, and often writes on Scottish issues
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anyone who watched the exchange in the Scottish Parliament... would certainly not recognize the story that you publish here.
Form your own Opinion watch it on You Tube... Salmond Verbally slaps down Stephens like some wayward child.
Hal, Methil,
The problem for the business-as-usual Westminster hacks is that they don't know how to handle a politics outside their narrow reach so they invent half-baked assaults in lieu of real debate. With Unionist defenders of this calibre, it's no wonder Mr Salmond is having a well-deserved honeymoon.
English voters are increasingly looking jealously to a Government led by a viable leader of a party opposing the uninspiring 3 wise monkey politics south of the border.
Timothy J Perkins, Manchester, England
What a load of total tosh..........and not for the first time of late.....from Sir Magnus Linklater (Oops...sorry.......did I let the cat out of the bag there??)...............every Scots least favourite Unionist troll.
For anyone from south of the border who is interested in understanding the big political changes going on apace in Edinburgh....do yourself a favour........ignore this utter bilge and get direct onto the scottish papers on-line editions and forget this snivelling adherent to the Butcher's Apron
Hamish Morrison, Inverness, Scotland
The idea of Nicol Stephen, as 'the bad cop', stepping 'into the cell, slamming the door behind him and advancing in menacing style towards the prisoner' is oh so laughable. That such a lightweight could pose Salmond any kind of distress is as proposterous as this article.
paul, tayport, fife
More Unionist bigotry. When are you lot going to get the message that we dont want to be part of the United Kingdom. Waffling rubbish to your English readers wont change one thing especially our opinion that Westminster is nothing more than the place that the pigs stick their snout in the public trough to gorge themselves with as much of the hard spent earnings of Joe Public.
You have a Labour Government run by a Scottish Mafia who have entrenched themselves into controlling every fabric of public corruption. Gordon Brown is an administrator who cannot administer. He hasnt had an original idea in his career. On the other hand we have the nancy boy who went to mummy and daddies choice of public school. He fluked it by being able to talk under water with a mouth full of marbles, whilst his opposition stuttered along very much the one eyed pirate.
Concentrate on your country for the sake of the few English People you have left living there now. English Clearances is your inheritance
Mike, Edinburgh, Kingdom of Scotland
More dismal nonsense in an attempt to cover up Wendy Alexander's criminal acts.
3 weeks after admitting to breaking the law on live tv she has still not been arrested .
Why not?
As has been proved already there were 2 phone calls.
At the first the Trump rep's were present. For the 2nd when the application was called in, they were absent.
No sleaze. No cover up. No story.
Unlike the Lib Dem who had 2 votes on the one comittee being sacked. Most of his party failed to support him.
Liberal Democrats, neither Lib nor Dem and never have been.
Labour lost the election. Get over it.
PJGent, Edinburgh,
A storm in a teacup and the unionists looking to distract us all from Wendygate. "What's that" I hear you say. A known crime, admitted to, and yet no police action against the perpetrators. And if the First Minister hadn't met with Trump, they'd have been claiming dereliction of duty.
What this article also fails to mention is that the vast majority of the people impacted by this development are behind the Scottish Government. Goldie, Nicol et al are, once again, shooting themselves in the foot.
Colin, Edinburgh,
The cynic might conclude this is an attempt to deflect attention from Wendygate. It's a non-story as the First Minister is obliged to meet his constituents or those who wish to do business within his constituency. Could you report that too please and try to be a little more even-handed?
Matthew, Stirling, Scotland