Sorry, Matthew, it's been done!

In the aftermath of Chernobyll, a very fair number of aged scientists did volunteer for the literally-suicidal task of cleaning up the radioactive mess; their offer was not accepted but it was made. And there was a movement in the 1930s, 'Live Dangerously', that argued that we live our lives the wrong way round, that it's we hoaries who should do the risky - exciting, fun - things while the kids preserve themselves for the reponsibilities of marriage and kids; some of its oldies did work and die in bomb disposal.

Noel Falconer, COUIZA, France

It is typical of Parris that he should forget the practical ifficulties created by using geriatrics to carry out such hazardous tasks - who will ever forget his failed attempt to impress Mrs Thatcher by proving it was possible to live on state hand-outs. You need to be fit and strong to carry out all of the dangerous tasks listed by him, even the youthful Parris himself would be tested.

dennis mahoney, camborne, uk

Well, it is my generation that must take most of the blame for the mess. Justice it is, but I always hope for mercy.

Children have no chance to change anything. There is too much bleating about Ageism. The victims are everywhere. Down with divide aand conquer.

Michael, STOCKPORT, ENGLAND

I think that there is merit in Matthew Parris's argument when it comes to recruitment into the armed forces. There must be many front line jobs in which technological expertise is more valuable than the ability to yomp across rugged terrain carrying heavy equipment. Many people in their 50s are still fit and active and could serve effectively in some positions. Warfare has changed since the first half of the 20th century. Why doesn't the Army increase the age up to which recruits will be accepted?

Cliff Pooley, Cheltenham,

Oh Yes!! Having outlived (at 55) every other male member of my family that I ever knew about, I'm just waiting for the hammer to fall.

It would give me something to do, and shorten the queue at my local hospital.

Keith Hamshire, Hayle, Cornwall

Nice one! But I would also include 'lifers' - remember the film "The Dirty Dozen"?
Give them the job of testing the smaller parachutes........

phil, Preston,

Yes ! Anything that keeps them out of Tesco's on Saturdays !

Roland Smith, Amersham, UK

Not all of us oldies have the kind of disposal income that Matthew doubtless has. I don't begrudge him his riches. He's worked hard for them, no doubt, and has had to suffer the slings and arrows that most of us don't have to battle with. If I had more money to spend I'd be booking my cruise, my trip to see those new leopards in Borneo, journeys to the Great Wall of China, the palaces at St Petersburg and preparing for dozens, if not hundreds, of other fascinating experiences. But I can't. I'm skint, like, I suspect, quite a few people are. So I rely on the internet to at least bring me those fabulous experiences secondhand. It's better than nothing.

Mike, Spalding, Police State

Matthew's article put me in mind of a short film I saw some years back (I think by Frederick Forsyth). An elderly couple were being bullied and exhorted by some criminal type. It went on for a bit and one's loathing of the criminal was matched by the exasperation of the elderly man making no attempt to stand up for himself and his invalid wife. After yet another payment had been made one saw the criminal cycling (I think) off with a biscuit tin full of money only for him to disappear in the distance in an explosion. The last shot showed the elderly man looking through the war-time awards for bravery he'd received for....................... bomb disposal!

John C, Helston,

Suely all of this was covered in the Mikado around a century ago by Gilbert and Sullivan in the song...........
I have a litle list of of society offenders who never would be missed.
-
Nowadays it should include former politicians who like to wind-up everyone else.
-

Michael Blatchford, Bath, UK

I think Matthew has a point, and it may not be as callous as Jason Addy suggests.

It boils to "the most for the most", to coin a phrase. Presumably, Jason advocates sending in the youngest, fittest and healthiest?

Ronnie, shrewsbury,

I have often said the elderly should embark upon these high risk activities, not only does it allow them the andrenalin rush that's missing from their Stena stairlift but the fatalities associated with such high risk endeavours would ease financial pressures on the NHS as well as giving highly interesting epitaphs on grave stones around the country!

Matt Coates, Guildford, UK

We're going to miss your column Matthew, but wish you well in your new career - honestly!

Painton Cowen, London,

I believe in growing older disgracefully myself! There are too many negative perceptions around ageing which then affects the way we look at our life which , in turn, affects the way we actually age. The best way to live our life, at whatever age, is to accept it with grace and ENJOY it!

Elaine Sihera, Maidenhead, United Kingdom

Mr Parris,
I have just read your flippant suggestion about employing older people to work with asbestos. I apprecaite that you were only making a wider point and not really considering such a callous calculation of the marginal value of human life.

However, archived asbestos company files show that decades ago, the asbestos industry held the view that those older men who already had asbestos disease shouldn't be told about it. Let them carry on 'til they drop.

The good old days before the 'nanny state' eh?

Jason Addy, Rochdale,

While this piece is obviously satire (it is isn't it?) I can't help thinking that the long-term unemployed would suit these dangerous tasks better. A chance to do something interesting, helping others, an opportunity to put something back into society rather than be a burden on it and of course if they die during the deed, we save thousands a year in benefit.

Derek Leach, Bredhurst, England

Because Quality of Life != Length of Life? Dying from cancer, or asbestos poisoning is going to be just as painful at 70 as it is at 30.

Jack Thursby, Sheffield, UK

Another paradox is that the government wants us to change our lifestyles to live longer, while at the same time ensuring that we spend those extra years in poverty. Logically, it should be encouraging us to live fast, die young, so that it can pay decent pensions to the survivors.

andrew levens, cirencester,

Risk Age Profiling. Great idea, but I fear it could be stymied by Age Discrimination Legislation which will need some cases requiring Intervention to validate its place on the statute books and costs of any attendant supervisory commission.

Maybe a suitable code will emerges for Senior Recruitment.
‘Suit applicant of any age, medication breaks and Zimmer provided,’ perhaps.

dr venables preller, Warminster, UK

It's a biological fact that "oldies" lose their sense of fear. Not that they in some way do a mental calculation of how long they have yet to live.

I propose Matthew Parris for the post of chief guinea pig in the testing of government "initiatives": there's hardly any more dangerous job than testing Tony and Gordon's quarter-baked ideas.

Tom Farrier, Weybridge, UK

This is a brilliant wheeze. Let Mr Parrish sign up for this scheme immediately, his enthusiasm will be an example to his peers. It is a universally accepted fact that if you don't die, you get old, so he has a good chance of helping future generations.

m. wilde, kingston,

Since almost everyone wants a title, why not introduce legislation to give all British citizens the right to call themselves Lord or Lady this-or-that, after all, the matter of honour is missing from the appointment now. But as titles go, why is it assumed the members of a new upper house would be called senators - surely a newer name could be devised rather than copying other legislative bodies.

David Cunard, Los Angeles, USA