Matthew Parris
Download 'Too Hot', an exclusive Specials track from iTunes
I am driven to my wits' end by my fellow humans' feeble grasp of principled reasoning. Take this week's announcement of new government proposals. Anyone caught with drawings (or computer-generated images) of child sexual abuse will face up to three years in prison. This will close what ministers are now calling a “loophole”.
That was not yesterday's argument. When the existing ban on photographic images was enacted, the argument in principle was that real children are exploited and harmed to make these images, which is true. That entire philosophical plank on which the legislation
rested has now been kicked casually away. If you, alone in your room, put pencil to paper and draw - for your eyes only - an obscene doodle involving a child, you will invite a prison term of up to three years. There is real scope for vindictive citizens to ransack desks or bins and call the police.
Maria Eagle, the Justice Minister, said that the move was not intended to curb creativity or freedom of expression but to tackle images that had “no place in society”. Crikey - the intellectual sloppiness! The move does curb creativity and freedom of expression: it curbs both in pursuit of what its proponents consider the greater public good. No censorship in history has ever been advanced on any other ground.
And it establishes a principle: that images with “no place in society” should not be allowed to exist. So what about racist, or sexist, or sadomasochistic, or gratuitously violent, or homophobic, or anti-Islamic, or anti-Christian images produced not for publication but for private gratification? The logical extension of Ms Eagle's principle is almost boundless.
Even as I write I realise the lament will be a lonely one. Some will even think I have a soft spot for child-molesting. I know I am wasting my time.

But, hell, I'll stick to my guns. Another example of careless jurisprudence this week: on Monday a new law came into force requiring fortune-tellers, clairvoyants, astrologers and mediums to stipulate explicitly that their services are for “entertainment only”.
Well, trades descriptions legislation is anciently established; but in the realms of the spirit, prophecy, invisible worlds, ghosts and human souls, it has generally been felt that the whole thing is too cloudy for law. By bringing access to other spiritual dimensions into line with access to (say) a British Airways club class lounge, and by deeming in law - for that is what this measure does - that claims about worlds undreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio, are false, Parliament has taken a serious step in principle, even if the measure itself is trivial and most clairvoyants are only jokers anyway.
What, for instance, about the “faith” community? Perhaps it's there in the legislative small print already. There will have to be an exception in law for “religions”. Whereupon clairvoyants will presumably rename themselves spiritualists. And spiritualists will presumably claim the status of a religion. Whereupon lawmakers will stipulate that a “religion” has to centre around a deity. Whereupon Buddhism will cease to be a “religion”; and...
...Well you see the philosophical marsh into which this new principle leads. Is Parliament aware of any harder evidence for the efficacy of faith-healing than for the reliability of clairvoyance? I'd like to hear it. Otherwise, let the collecting boxes in church display a sign “for entertainment purposes only” and let Catholics buy candles to light “for entertainment purposes only”; and let trips to Lourdes be sold “for entertainment purposes only”. And let the raiment of the priest administering the Sacrament be embroidered likewise.
Imagine the churchyard billboard: the Power of Prayer (for entertainment purposes only).

I am occasionally reminded what a troubling spectacle I may present. On Saturday in Derbyshire I flagged down a car heading for the holiday cottage near our house, and said: “Park at the end; your friends have already arrived.” Seized with a conviction (erroneous) that I recognised this elderly couple, I gushed: “Haven't I seen you somewhere before?” They said nothing, rolled up their window and pulled away rather fast. Odd.
But think it through, Parris. I was tacking old carpet on to a tin roof so honeysuckle will spread over it. I was shoeless and unshaven. There was a cut on my forehead. My favourite old shirt's collar was frayed to ribbons. My principal fly-button had gone.
In my right hand was a Stanley knife, in my left a hammer and a reel of fishing line. From my top pocket the sharp end of an awl stuck out. Poor dears. They must have thought they'd driven into a scene from Deliverance.
Matthew Parris joined The Times as parliamentary sketchwriter in 1988, a role he held until 2001. He had formerly worked for the Foreign Office and been a Conservative MP from 1979-86. He has published many books on travel and politics and an autobiography, Chance Witness, for which he won the 2004 Orwell Prize. His diary appears in The Times on Thursdays, and his Opinion column on Saturdays
Win a luxury weekend to Newcastle and its neighbour Gateshead, find out more here
Risk, resilience and embracing new technology
Industry sectors news at a glance. Interactive heatmap, video and podcast
Discover the power of collective thinking. Submit a solution and be in with a chance to win a Media Hub Home Entertainment System
The inside track on current trends in the charity, not for profit and social enterprise sectors
Everything the Business Traveller needs to know to make a better trip
Make the most of the summer and enter our fabulous photographic competition, you could win a £5000 holiday
Corsica is an island of beauty and contrast, an ideal holiday destination
Enjoy further reading from Travel to Fashion, Business to Sport, discover more
Shortcuts to help you find sections and articles
The clever way to lease a new car is with Car leasing made simple™
2009
per month on 36-month
Personal Contract Hire (PCH)
2008
42850
Car Insurance
£24,250 - £30,346
MI5
London
£60,000
The Environment Agency
Bristol
Up to £90K
Boots
Midlands
OTE £85k
Credit Protection Association
Nationwide Opportunities
Completely London
Luxury Condo's in Manhattan with NYC views
The best new homes in Wimbledon?
Nationwide
Fabulous Cruise And Cruise & Stay Offers Including Virgin Atlantic Flights Prices Start From Only £699pp!
Last Minute Cruise And Cruise & Stay Offers. Med From £499pp, Caribbean From £699pp!
5 star quality at a 3 star price.
8 fabulous Canadian cities ...you won’t find cheaper
Contact our advertising team for advertising and sponsorship in Times Online, The Times and The Sunday Times, or place your advertisement.
Times Online Services: Dating | Jobs | Property Search | Used Cars | Holidays | Births, Marriages, Deaths | Subscriptions | E-paper
News International associated websites: Globrix Property Search | Property Finder | Milkround
Copyright 2009 Times Newspapers Ltd.
This service is provided on Times Newspapers' standard Terms and Conditions. Please read our Privacy Policy.To inquire about a licence to reproduce material from Times Online, The Times or The Sunday Times, click here.This website is published by a member of the News International Group. News International Limited, 1 Virginia St, London E98 1XY, is the holding company for the News International group and is registered in England No 81701. VAT number GB 243 8054 69.
Christine: "Most people don't want to believe as they don't want to bother with living a christian life"
And what about the overwhelming number of Christians who don't seem to want to bother with living a Christian life?
David Jones, Loughborough, UK
To Giles, Manchester,
'Religion is for people who can't accept reality I am afraid.'
i believe it is those who don't believe that are afraid as we know the truth. Most people don't want to believe as they don't want to bother with living a christian life.
Christine, UK, UK
Here in the US "virtual" child pornography was banned in 1996. However, the ban was overturned by a 2002 Supreme Court decision.
Ken C, Kent, USA
"(T)hen we have to do the same for our... scientists. Since their musings are just beliefs about the facts as they see them"
I take umbrage at that remark. Science is not about "belief" but rather about the accumulation of facts. It is not just a "belief" that gravity, electricity, etc. exist.
Rev Al Matulewicz, Whiting, Indiana, United States of America
Matthew if we label faith groups for entertainment purposes only, then we have to do the same for our philosophers and scientists. Since their musings are just beliefs about the facts as they see them, much like any tehologian.
Jason Reid, Plymouth, UK
Dear Matthew, you could have the horns of Beelzebub himself and you would still appear to me an innocent. The couple might have been violently in disagreement with that day's column.
Kevin Straw, Leicester,
You seem to have missed the Criminal Justice & Immigration Bill 2008 which makes it a criminal offence to own "so-called" extreme pornography -- even if the protagonists are consenting and the image is only play-acted.
The government's argument for that law -- the material has no place in society.
deborah hyde, London, UK
There is absolutely no entertainment to be enjoyed at the Church in Wales. The services at our local are deeply serious, solemn affairs. Even the books appear to date from the 19th Century. Not surprised Bishop Carl hung up his mitre for a job in the proper world. Only eccentric clergy now remain.
Colin , Llandingat Without, Rural Wales
As an enlightened society and champions of freedom we've pretty much had it.
We're not sleepwalking into a police state, we're in it. right up to our elbows and sinking fast.
Thankfully all draconian regimes end up being put to the torch. I can't wait for the day...
Ian, Enfield, Miidlesex
Spot on Matthew. We are already in a dystopian 1984 style country after the Dangerous Picture Act, SOCPA and others.
We need more mainstream attention from the newspapers to draw attention to all the civil liberties this pathetic excuse for a Government is taking from us.
Vive la revolution! ;-)
John Harding, Macclesfield,
Absolutely, authority truely scares me. Matthew wrote previously that we need governments to inspire us. Well maybe we do but surely not our present labour government and I am not convinced that David Camerons Tories will be much better. Perhaps Borris Johnson or even Matthew Parris.
Ross, London, UK
where does one apply to obtain a licence how much do you have to pay do you sit an exam who marks the paper
when did tony blair obtain his do they last foever or need renewing like driving licences whwn you get old one could go on and on with lots ofquestions
jim, edinburgh,
And all these laws will be enforced by target-driven policing with no room for discretion. Thought-crime indeed - truly an Orwellian age. Well put, MP.
Paul, London, UK
We are sleepwalking into a police state and pretty soon the government will declare elections illegal because they interfere with the 'progress' being made by new labour towards our utopian multicultural society. A call for an election will be deemed a crime against society even if voiced in private
D Manton, St. Neots , Cambs
Give it ten years, and our Orwellian Government will be putting people in prison just for thinking about drawings of imaginary children. Give it twenty years, and they'll probably outlaw having children at all, thus destroying any possibility of paedophiles ever existing. God help us all.
Neil S, Glasgow, Scotland
There was a time when philosophers thought democracy was determined by the lack of need for laws in a stable and advanced society.
Just shows you how far downhill we have travelled.
Minnie Ovens, LA, USA
On 'indecent drawings' - well said. The truth is that the anti-paedophile police are grossly overstaffed, so there is constant pressure for new 'offences' to be invented. But beware, Mr Paris - the time is coming when even to express such rational views will be an offence in itself.
Andrew May, Wimbledon, London
I'm glad to side with you in this one. Although I'm more than willing to demand a hanging for someone with photo's of child molestation, a drawn image just can not compare.
No one was harmed creating it, so how can it be wrong?
Dominic, Manchester, England
Andrew_in_Cardif:"Millions of people visit Lourdes each year but the catholic church itself claims only 66 miracles"
The formal investigation was stopped as 66 proven, documented miracles is more than enough, while the process, to be unimpeacheable, is expensive. Miracles are still happening.
Greg Lorriman, Leatherhead, UK
to G J BUNTON your comment show your lack of understanding of things. I am a spiritualist and for me there is no up or down but just forward. So please do not mock people that has a faith if you have none.
knight, aberdeen, uk
So, they're going after clairvoyants, fortune-tellers, astrologers and mediums. Good!
Now add preachers of religion to the list!
Nick, London, UK
So if I were to go into the British Museum, and make a sketch of the notorious ancient greek sex scenes the famous and prominently-displayed Warren Cup, could I be arrested on the way out and banged up for three years?
Mary Barton, Dorchester, UK
Is this the same Maria Eagle who appeared on R4's Today programme despite noy having seen it? Now who is the clairvoyant?
Let's face it; many of those in the lowere cadres of government are just thick aren't they?
Terry Walpole, Queens Park. Brighton.,
The worlds oldest democracy?
Now where would that be?
Surely not the UK.
Tom Halpin, London, UK
"The intent of such measures is not to protect actual children, but to allow adults to congratulate themselves for protecting children."
Agreed. This proposal, besides invoking Big Brother, is mere laziness: instead of actually capturing paedophiles, they make laws to appear as if they are doing so
Ruby, Glasgow,
Millions of people visit Lourdes each year but the catholic church itself claims only 66 miracles. That's not terribly effective - people have more chance of catching something nasty from other visitors. If religion is not just "for entertainment only" let them prove it - scientifically.
Andrew_in_Cardiff, Cardiff, UK
Spiritualism is already a religion, many of my family are members of the spiritualist church, yes a church, another thing you got wrong in your article, spiritualists do have a deity, you know the one - God, Jesus Christ, spiritualism is a branch of christianity. I am amazed how so few people know.
Holly, Kingston-Upon-Thames, UK
The law risks catching all sorts of material, such as manga/hentai - anything where the character might appear to be under 18. How do you tell a drawing of a 17 year old from an adult?
With the recent criminalisation of "extreme" adult images, will "extreme" adult cartoons be next?
Mark, London,
About time the law caught up with all these religeons.
I propose a sign over each church reading:-
Whilst entrance into this establishment could benefit you in the after-life, it must be pointed out that your final journey may be downward and not guaranteed to be upward.
G J BUNTON, Slough, Berkshire
This is an attack in ideas, not actions, harm done nor even incitement, because none can be shown. The wording of this proposal puts readers of Manga/Anime in great danger of being labelled paedophiles. Another over-broad law, unsupported by credible evidence. What ideas will be next to be banned?
Gareth Roberts, Hulme,
Yet another law for which they have no credible evidence. The thought police march relentlessly on. The evidence is that access to this material actually causes a decrease in crime, but they simply ignore this and yet again wish to ban 'bad thoughts'. No way are they getting my vote again
Steven Dorif, Salford,
Matthew I agree with you, although if religion is "entertainment", give me the cinema, TV, socialising, sport etc etc everytime. Religion is for people who can't accept reality I am afraid.
Giles, Manchester,
What I find most baffling Matthew is whatever made you become a MP ?
Where you never told "There is no situation so dire that MPs cannot make it worse."
As for religion have you never been told "God works in mysterious ways " So There.
Peter Bolt, Redditch, UK
Rowan's comment
" think the point about banning images of child-abuse is to prevent sadists from viewing such images and then going out and abusing real children"
Really????
Then the reverse will be true-
People read or look at nice images and then go out and do good things?
Yeah right.
Dave Clemo, Kettering, UK
Surely most of the 60-odd criminal justice bills this government has passed have been 'for entertainment only', since they seem principally designed to win headlines.
John, Liverpool, uk
Self interest rather than high minded philosophy appears to me to be the main concern of most libertarians. I'd be more respectful of their opinions if you were honest rather than pretending to be interested in the freedoms of others.
Jason White, Paris,
So when our favourite ministers stand up in Parliament & say something like "This new law will result in benefits for the community" are they not fortune telling?
Should they not be required to state "for entertainment only"?
Except, sadly, they are mostly not entertaining - more the opposite.
marton, eglisau, switzerland
I think Paedophile Rape is one of the worst crimes that exists but I don't think prosecuting cartoons is the way forward. It's just the sort of legistation that will end up being a lever into greater intrusion on civil liberties.
NuLab should rename itself as the Orwellian Party
John Begoode, Welwyn Garden City, UK
Excellent point about the drawings.
But labelling religon as for entertainment purposes would not be a bad thing, religon and "faith" get an easy ride as they are generally considered to be above criticism. Religous beliefs should be treated the same way as political affliation, or taste in music
chris, brighton,
No Mr. Parris you are not alone in feeling uneasy about this latest piece of proposed legislation concerning child pornography; like the majority of the population I abhor the the thought of what these people get up to, but this proposal brings to mind words like wedge and thin end.
P.J.Bowes, Whissonsett, England
Many miracles of Lourdes are proven and fully documented. so there will be no need for such labelling. Further Faith is based on direct revelation from God to the genuine seeker, and so the believer has objective knowledge/proof. Rather it is scientists who should stop abusing the word 'proof'.
Greg Lorriman, Leatherhead, UK
The intent of such measures is not to protect actual children, but to allow adults to congratulate themselves for protecting children.
Eric Richard, Tulsa, Oklahoma, USA
No, Matthew, you are not alone. The criminalization of those who look at images where no crime was committed in the generation of those images, and the creepy phrase 'which have no place in society' are thoughtcrime pure and simple. It's frightening.
Ralph, Pevensey Bay, UK
I saw a fortune teller the other day who told me the labour government was finished, my bookie tells me the same. Both provide entertainment and hopefully both are telling the truth.
Simon Marshland, Bath, UK
Only God has power. God created the heavens & the earth. Even the Pope has no power. The Pope is equal to every other person before God. All christians are saints. Canonised saints have no power. It is God who heals & performs miracles.
Helen , SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA
Thank you very much for making me think! I hadn't thought through alternative vs. trad faith.
Not all alternatives are quacks. Some give invaluable support and advice. Isn't it rather patronising to assume that people are "wasting" money on them? How much money is wasted on shrinks?
Ruth, Johannesburg,
And of course politicians, and political parties, will need disclaimers too!
Bill, Yeovil, UK
"Even as I write I realise the lament will be a lonely one."
I hope not lonely. The battle for freedom of thought, expression and speech has been won at too dear a cost for it to be let slip away. The people who seek to ban drawings must have thought about them first.
Walter le Rouge, Milton KEYNES,
The recent case of a 16 year old boy and a placard suggesting the scientologists are a cult (what, goodness me, a cult ?) gives an insight into how our mindless forces of law and order interpret edicts from their masters.
John Jobling, Melrose,
But surely Clairvoyants and Tarot readers and Crystal Ball predictors are free to operate and predict what they like, just as organised religions are, by taking a collection. Certainly they can continue to predict and claim special powers, it is not a problem if they take no money.
Keith, Rayleigh, England
Unfortunately positive images, such as those showing women in control of their own sexuality, have also been, at times, deemed 'images which have no place in society'.
More censorship on this board - wanted to say more but 'have no characters left' - what chance of reasoned debate with >50words?
Ned Ludd, Norwich,
Whilst the motive for banning child pornography sketches may be very sound, the proposed legislation does reflect New Labour's insatiable demand to control it's citizens - and yes why not widen this to include racism, sectarianism, sexism, un-acceptable political views and much much more.
Wullie, Luss, Scotland
Bang on Matthew. Religion is unproven mumbo jumbo made up by people because they can't face the reality of their existence (i.e. we are animals, we die, the end). So why should the law apply to spiritualists and not religion.
Andrew, Cambridge,
The big difference is religions don't explicitly charge for a service.
Adam, Sheffield,
I couldnt agree more with Matthew. But the rot set in earlier.
We had the law on pseudo child porn. This already bypassed protecting children. The recent law on extreme adult pornography already applied verbiage of having no place in our society.
George Orwell must be turning in his grave.
Franco, Carlisle,
The present government delights in any measure that it can find to impinge upon personal freedom. If they can't tax it they just make it illegal. It will shortly become a crime to 'think' that the government should be replaced and you can be locked up for 42 days, without trial, for thinking it.
David Leslie, Perth, Scotland
Parris - evocatively self-aware as ever. At least he doesn't need a notebook to catch himself out.
Marvin, London,
Would the prohibition on articfical images extend to dramatisation? Would any film or TV programme dealing with borderline underage sex become criminalised. Skins, Inbetweeners anyone?
And why stop there? Surely the same logic would dictate that literature should also be banned. Bye bye Nabokov
Simon, London,
Re enjoying the suffering of others: one of the delights that true believers could look forward to in heaven was the sight of sinners suffering in hell. Perhaps religion will fall into the scope of this law as well.
Norman, Anstruther, UK
Dear Mr Cameron, please will you promise us that you won't meddle in peoples private lives, as the current government does, when you come to power with your party. We the people, on the whole, can be trusted. There will always be 'bad eggs' but we can use what we already have to sort them out surely
Rumbold, High Wycombe, England
Rowan from Oxford thinks there is a 'sound philosophical basis for this legislation'
So why aren't war movies banned? What about thrillers and murder detective movies?
And, aren't the Army wanting to go into schools- just so they can encourage children to go out and kill real people?
steven, london,
"Many, if not all, spiritualists do believe in God or a divine source at the very least. Have you not heard of the Christian Spiritualists?"
Thats as may be be Helen, but so what? Are you implying that these spiritualists are somehow legitimate whereas non Christian ones aren't? Truly pathetic.
John Dale, Sunderland,
Isn't it illegal already to claim to tell the future? I'm surprised fortune tellers (sorry, "clairvoyants") have been getting away with it up to now!
Graham Rounce, London, UK
Yet another excellent piece Matthew. Its gratifying to know that there's always one corner of the media where we can go for some common sense.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Won't you please consider returning to politics as an independant secular liberal.
Mark Allen, Nottingham,
It is shocking to think what some folk might be drawing at home. Thankfully, the governement may have ringfenced 50 trillion to extend the CCTV system to combat this problem.
What a pity that this goverment isn't 'for entertainment only'.
steven, london,
Rowan, the sound philosophical basis for banning images of suffering which you refer to could presumably but used to ban most of the output of holywood, a vast number of books and even a great deal of religious art. Once thought crime is on the statute books there's no obvious place to stop.
Exiled Tommy, Paris, France
nothing better than poacher turned gamekeeper in knowing where to look and discover govt. foolishness.
keep the boot in,even if it has fishing line for laces
john haydon rowe, javea,
The plank of logic in the argument for "child pornography" legislation hasn't just been kicked away - it has been missing from the beginning, when the crime was defined as possession of "indecent" images, rather than by any injury done to a child. That leads to its prosecution as thoughtcrime.
Guy Herbert, London, England
If Clairvoyants and fortune tellers have to carry "for entertainment only" warnings - shouldn't politicians ?
John N, Warminster, UK
I'm sure I'm not the first to think of this, but wouldn't this trade descriptions got-to-be-proved business also apply to political ideologies? Will we now be presented with Mr Speaker solemnly announcing at the start of PMQ that the proceedings are "for entertainment only"? Oh, hang on . . .
Alex Swanson, Milton Keynes, UK
Tom from Dublin said ",,,I've seen a lot of people spend a lot of money over the years on such things..."
Would making it an offence to practise clairvoyance or other wierd stuff actually stop people wasting money. Laws can't change this kind of stuff, they'll still waste money on entertainment.
Jon, Todmorden,
The Bible ' for entertainment only' - they will need to do a rather large recall of them, won't they?
Bill Bird, Wallasey, England
Keep fighting the good fight, Matthew. The government cannot be allowed to continue to slip in further illiberal legislation without being held to account
George Rowan, Liverpool, UK
I can see your point (about clairvoyants versus faith-healers, etc). But it's a start. I've seen a lot of people spend a lot of money over the years on such things, sometimes money they could ill-afford to spend on "non-essentials"
Tom, Dublin, Ireland
Many, if not all, spiritualists do believe in God or a divine source at the very least. Have you not heard of the Christian Spiritualists? I am tired of people talking about such things from the standpoint of almost entire ignorance. And, indeed, law-making from a similar one.
Helen, Oxford, UK
Qualifications for 'alternative' esoteric practices?
Most established religions have long compelled followers to accept very unlikely dogma, and to reject all other beliefs and practices as 'heretical'.
The whole lot should carry health warnings.
Peter J Hinton-Green, Johannesburg, South Africa
I think the point about banning images of child-abuse is to prevent sadists from viewing such images and then going out and abusing real children. I
t is wrong to enjoy the idea of suffering, whether that suffering is real or not, and there is a sound philosophical basis for this legislation.
Rowan, Oxford,