Matthew Parris
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Recording (for broadcast next Tuesday) a programme in my Great Lives series for BBC radio, my guest was David Lammy. Mr Lammy, who is black, is a government minister. He had chosen the American stand-up, Richard Pryor, who also was black. Lammy and I spent a lively half-hour discussing Pryor's (in some ways) troubled life, and listening to a few clips of brilliant comedy from an entertainer of whom I had known nothing. At times our conversation centred on the almost unbelievable racial prejudice, social and official, that dogged Pryor throughout his career.
We're talking about the 1960s and 1970s here, and it was shocking to be reminded how late the idea of racial equality came to America. My guest and I (I fear) may have lapsed into self-righteousness as we talked about those bad old days and primitive attitudes. How different (we implied) from modern times in our own dear country. Mr Lammy was a pleasant, fluent and thoughtful guest.
After the recording I saw the minister to the rather posh car booked for him, waiting outside. The minister shook my hand, got into the back seat, and shut the door. I waved. The (white) driver nodded politely to his passenger, then wound down his window.
“Where's he going?” he said to me.

Beijing: G8 with Lycra
Why, I cannot say, but I just can't get interested in these Olympics. Nor am I hearing others talking much about them. There's plenty in the media, of course, particularly about the politics, China, human rights, drug tests, smog, etc; but about the games themselves, the contestants, the big contests - very little in the street, pub or bus.
Partly this must be because British hopes are meagre this time; but if I'm not wrong there's something deeper: I sense a withdrawing tide of public interest in the whole institution, and in the events as events. The Olympics are choking themselves: choking themselves with puffed-upness and officialdom; choking themselves with money, with ceremony and committee, and with grandstanding and the trappings of state. Choking themselves with pride.
C.Northcote Parkinson once wrote that the beginnings of the decline of any great corporation may be tracked through receipts for the purchase of plate glass and marble. Something similar is happening to the Olympics. They are getting like any other international summit: like meetings of the UN Security Council, or a gathering of the G8: events that receive acres of media coverage and the benefit of much official and journalistic wisdom - but which are alienated from mass culture.
If anything can revive the Olympic heartbeat, as opposed to the pomp and circumstance, London can. But it may be too late. We shall see.

Reverse logic
Why can't people reverse any more? August brings tens of thousands of townies on to the narrow country lanes of Derbyshire, and it's hell out there between the hedgerows. But why should there be a problem? When two cars meet, one must reverse to the nearest passing place. As to who yields, the occasional dispute may occur; the less soluble difficulty is that so many modern drivers are simply incapable of reversing at all. They weave all over the place, usually into the ditch.
These people shouldn't be on the road. How did they get past their driving examination? Because there is no test of long-distance reversing. Trainee drivers must show they can reverse around one corner, execute a three-point turn, and parallel-park: all urban challenges. A test fit for rural purposes would involve reversing a hundred yards along a narrow, winding course marked out by traffic cones.
Nobody unable to do this should be allowed into the Derbyshire Peak District. I want border controls.

Rodent repelled
My squirrel problem is over. I've been road-testing the Squirrel Buster Plus, a fiendishly clever bird feeder which relies on the weight of anything heavier than a few birds to pull shut its seed ports. The pesky squirrels can see fat birds pecking from its perches, but when the rodent clambers up, the portcullis comes down. Ha! No doubt Derbyshire squirrels are now huddled in burrows, poring over diagrams, plotting a response. Logic and physics say they must fail.
So in a spirit of holiday generosity, departing for Colombia, I withdraw that menu for roast squirrel I published earlier. It may not be necessary. On my return I shall be seeking your advice on how to poison rats without threatening other wildlife. There has been an awkward incident with a cherished dachshund.
Matthew Parris joined The Times as parliamentary sketchwriter in 1988, a role he held until 2001. He had formerly worked for the Foreign Office and been a Conservative MP from 1979-86. He has published many books on travel and politics and an autobiography, Chance Witness, for which he won the 2004 Orwell Prize. His diary appears in The Times on Thursdays, and his Opinion column on Saturdays
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I don't see that as racist at all he could just as easily have been being polite.
Rob, London,
People can't reverse because they're taught to do it in a ridiculous way in lessons. The proper way is - seatbelt off, one hand on the wheel only, turn right round and SEE WHERE YOU'RE GOING. Watched my son trying to reverse round a corner with both hands shuffling the wheel in amazement.
monica, guildford,
could you please give the exact quote from C Northcote Parkinson - it seems particularly apt with RBS announcing their results tomorrow having fairly recently moved to an extremely smart HQ outside Edinburgh.
Kirsten Kooy, Edinburgh,
Alas dear Mathew the squirrels do not need to do anything. Depending on the rainfall in your area the springs operating the system will rust and eventually fail.
I hope you have replacements to hand
Brian, Helensburgh, UK
The London Olympics will not "revive the Olympic heartbeat". They will probably do a good job of laying bare the moral bankruptcy of the Olympics, given the oppressive legal measures introduced to ensure no-one but official sponsors is allowed to even allude to the event.
John H, Orpington,
Ye-es - so how patronised would you have felt, if in an analogous story about an interview with a gay person you had read 'Mr Parris was a pleasant, fluent and thoughtful guest'?
Konrad Brodzinski, London,
Taxi drivers bigoted ignorant know nothings? Well I never.
Stuart, Manchester, England
The driver knew that a government minister would have at least one chauffer driven car of his own and therefore assumed that your guest was a foreign dignatory.
Arthur Scroteworthy, Leeds, England
Surely the driver recognised that he had a government minister in the back of his car, and so realised that he would have absolutely no idea where he was going.
Simon, Brussels,
matthew you may recall I door stepped you in old bond street some weeks ago.whilst I knew who you were (?)my workers could only comment that I was in conversation with a man in possesion of a squirrel buster plus.I understood at once.
kevin daley, hatfield, herts