Should we blindly accept and partake in the customs of Darfur or Sudan?
You undermine your own disingenuous argument by saying our culture should be "worthy of respect" if we want respect

You imply there is some tacit universal understanding of decency, even thought it changes in time and place.

Arnold, Golden, United States

Hook up some minor infraction of propriety with 1968 and you're away as a tight-lipped reactionary columnist keen to twist the very culture you quote: the "Thou hast conquered" riff is based on Swinburne's dismissal of Christian hypocrisy: "O pale Galilean/ The world has grown grey from thy breath."

Martin Walker, Frankfurt, Germany

As someone from a Muslim country, who has seen the way English tourists act, I couldn't agree more with this article. I am all for sexual liberation and sex outside of marriage. But, I can't see why the English can't behave more like the supposedly "ugly" Americans. Perhaps it is a matter of class?

Elif Gurel, Berkeley, USA

1. These vulgar people are in the minority 2. Degenerates will arise when a society has the freedom of choice 3. I would rather the choice than arbitrary social restrictions 4. Get rid of easyjet and ryanair from London and much of the problem will likely be solved (in Europe anyway).

Alexander Besant, Toronto, Canada

The culture of the West is worthy of respect, whatever culturally-ignorant masochists may say. Louts and permissiveness on one hand, oppressive (but modest!) families and insane laws on the other. Take your pick of extremes.

Dear Gerry: Drunken beach sex is beautiful?

Jon, Shenzhen,

As an expatriate of 22 years standing, I object to your smearing of us. We are not holidaymakers. The vast majority of us respect our hosts.
BUT ... well not to be a hypocrite, I've had sex on a beach in a muslim country and in a public park in the UK. But it was well away from the public gaze

Jim Lincoln, Geneva, Switzerland.

I believe that religious teachings are at the crux of this social conundrum. Their distortions of morality have caused millions of people to think that sex is wrong and dirty and unholy. In truth it is one of the most beautiful and natural acts of love that the human species can express!

Gerry Mack, Buffalo, NY, USA

What a lot of tosh, this is one of the sloppiest, contradictory columns I have ever read. If this were true the gaols of Dubai would be full, Britons would be barred from most of Europe and the UK would already be a Shariah state.

stavros, wormington on sea, UK

I dont see many people having sympathy for the couple that were caught, contary to the thrust of this article.

Tim, Yeovil, Englandshire

IT'S JUST A SONG! Even when I first heard it at 17 I realised that it wasn't meant to be taken seriously. Some people find seeing sex in public deeply offensive (can't see the attraction myself). Personally, I find the sight of women veiled head to foot deeply offensive, but I respect that choice

Peter, Birmingham, UK

As an American businessman long resident in Europe, with many close and admirable British friends and associates, I still can't fathom the compulsion of so many young British abroad to excess with total disregard for any laws, culture and their police. Your article is a masterpiece. Bravo!.

James, Marbella, Spain

Most of this national crudity and irresponsibility is because our children have not been 'educated in the round', in the complete sense, since the 1950s due to incessant political interference.

McLabour's past disasterous decade has strangled what decency remained in the education 'system'.

dave, cumbria,

I drive 700 miles each week. I pass through 30, 40, 50, 60 and 70 mph speed limits. If I'm out of MY county, the sun is shinning, the music playing is good, and I'm feeling relaxed, should I ignore them?
It's no different to being abroad. You play by their rules, or you pay the price.

Steven, Sunderland,

Across the world we are known for our lack of manners and morals and our disregard for other cultures. As you say, if you don't agree with the culture of a country perhaps it's best you stay away? Alcohol makes fools of the best of us and humiliating spectacles of the rest.

Olivia Beardmore, Birmingham , UK

Of course when someone is a visitor in another country they should respect the social mores of that country. I find it incredible when visiting historic monuments in some moslem countries i see tourists wearing next to nothing - even just thongs but these do tend to be eastern europeans.

Penny, London,

There is something clearly despicable in the permissiveness and hyper-sexualisation of western culture; the result is broken families, unwanted children, sexual diseases and a state of agitation which drives the young into chaos and crime.

Couldn't have put it better myself

Manny, Redcar, UK

If people in England shall be ignored by the police when having sex in public, so as not to offend or embarass them, then what, please, will the British police do to avoid sex in public offending others? Tell them not to go out anymore on a Saturday night? I can see the mob ruling in the near future

Morgan, Birmingham,

These people were daft - the rules in these countries are clear enough.

However, that won't change my view that the laws in such countries are vindictive, repressive and brutal. These are NOT democracies, so the laws are made by an autocratic elite - talk of a "host culture" is nonsense.

Nick, France,

We recently took our kids to Mallorca for the summer. (We live in Germany). The behaviour of the Brits was the worst I have ever seen. Loud, rude and in bad taste all the way. It was revolting!

Susan Lutz, Wuerzburg,

Muslim morality (in the UK) views the host culture's appaling morals and tries to shield it's own children from it's impact. This process creates an increasing environment of alienation and mutual dislike with all it's consequences. Where's the solution? Can you compromise on morality?

Don , Singapore,

The incident in question happened in Dubai, but this is not an issue of Muslim values. All decent, civilised societies should find such behaviour indecent.

Ben, Hong Kong,

The 60s generation rejected the past because they had the answer to everything. They were the revolutionaries were going to destroy the old ways, do just as they wished and Change the World.
We changed it alright, and in our arrogance look what a mess we have turned it into.

Jimmy R, Highland, Scotland

I agree with many of the comments saying that not all Brits are as described, but unfortunately, the ones who are give the entire country a bad name and seem to get away with it. It's about time that someone actually said what many of us most considerate Brits are thinking...

Richard, Marlow, UK

Drawbacks of Globalization and perhaps an over bearing, over intrusive Government at home that engenders open defiance out of frustration and a sense of powerlessness. Not much different than the 60's except for the growth in official intrusion.The need for respect never goes away.

Karl Lingenfelder, San Diego, USA

There are bad apples wherever you go in the world. When I have travelled I make a point of avoiding the main resorts frequented by Brits abroad as I have seen too many examples.
I prefer to go out and meet the locals and learn the basic hello, please, thankyou etc. in their language. RESPECT.

Trevor Lacey, Heanor, UK

Jim, Finland – well said. Whilst some may find it exciting to have sex in public, for example, they must accept the consequences of doing so, wherever they are and whatever the cultural implications.

Richard, Marlow, UK

Well written, Minette. The fornicators of Dubai have done their bit to degrade and weaken British / Western soft power and boost Al Qaeda's propaganda into the bargain. Why do some British expatriates not realise they have responsibilities as well as tax-free benefits arising from their status.

Bob, London,

They were fully clothed, in the dark, and only snogging, wake up you pathetic prudes!

sedgwick, london, UK

Once upon a time to travel the world one was proud to be British,ah yes,a polite gentleman was the reaction one got.
Today I am ashamed of the disgraceful behaviour of the British abroad,fortunately I now have two passports.
The only time I use my British one is to avoid long lines at airports.

John W Meadows, Los Altos Hills, California

We should all return to having a strict moral code within our upbringing, if this means victorian values then so be it... I am sometimes ashamed to be British. I live abroad but we do not have sex in public as in Finland we would find our bits frozen off... But seriously Brits need moral guidance...

jim, oulu, finland

I grew up in Dubai and remember it as one of the most liberal of Muslim societies - as long as you didn't wear your bikini to the supermarket, all was fine. Palmer and Acors were rude and arrogant to do what they liked in someone else's country.

K John, London, UK

Yes, I agree Minette. However please do not go overboard on how devout Muslims abhor western licentiousness. A quick trip around the Parkwest area of London where the blonde English prostitutes get most of their business from the very same devout Muslims will give you a dose of reality.

Callan, Liverpool, England

"when in rome do as the romans do"?

Pity so many immigrants to this country refuse to take that advice and fight tooth nail and claw not to.

I think the ire could be equally justifiably directed at most immigrants to this country.

ta da, you just condoned most racism in the UK.

peter, york, uk

The very first time I went abroad to Greece I witnessed a group of Brits at a restaurant drinking themselves silly and then one of the them started to dance on top of the restaurant table, pulling down his trousers. showing off his leopard swimming trunks which he then also removed. Stunning!

Katrina, Berlin, Germany

This line gets slung out there by every metropolitan 'elite' in the media, but I just don't think it's true. The overwhelming majority of Britons abroad are kind, happy, polite and interested. There are vomiting Brits, but they tend to be young and at young, 'party' resorts. Stop the self-loathing.

Steve Jacks, London,

If they despise British culture & decadent behaviour so much why do they continue to come here accepting our health & benefits system? I doubt whether they disagree with our legal system which protects the rights of the accused, forbids torture, execution or extradition & provides free legal aid.

peter, worthing,

"If we expect ethnic minorities here to respect the host culture..." Minette, not all ethnic minorities are of a different culture - you can be of Asian or black origin but still subscribe to the same 'British' culture as white British people. Culture is not the same as race.

RP, London,

I agree with Wendy. There are people out there that give the British a bad name but that is no need to label a whole nation as disgraceful. This is the sort of smug drivel that will no doubt be a favourite topic at many a dinner party where the middle classes rush to jump aboard their high horses.

Rachel, Hiroshima, Japan

Of course people should respect & abide by the laws & cultures of their host country.
How contradictory then, to condone the publicly expressed views of many Muslims in Britain who have negative opinions of our culture.
Whether or not British laws and cultures are "worthy of respect" is irrelevant!

James, Leeds,

a contradictory article - if we base a culture's respect-worthiness on the behaviour those living under it, then few cultures in today's world are worthy of respect: the awful abuses that take place in Western Europe and in Asia and Africa etc. mean that respect has little place in many societies.

Marco, Kraków, Poland

Perhaps, if your generation Minette had taught your children some boundaries instead of being to busy with your own career, this might have been avoided.

But luckily we live in a culture that gives us the chance to sort out these indiscretions without being stoned to death...

Allan, Rotterdam, The Netherlands

Simplistic: problem is political & moral.

Thatcher introduced 'me, me' individualism, preached pitiless capitalism, wiped out w-class communities, dumbed-down education.

Result: displaced indigenous pop; social anarchy, unregulated immigration, 'fat cats' & moronic celebrities as role models.

kathleen, cork,

I have travelled the world and rarely experienced bad behaviour by Brits who are on the whole polite and self deprecating.

The real problem in the UK is an outdated class system which leads to double standards. Is'nt it time Marin got the boot for elitist snobbery week in week out.

Stuz Graz, London, England

Speak for yourself.

Steve, MANSFIELD, England

I think this is as much about tradition as religion, religions in the UK say the same thing. it is not traditional to shag on the beaches or in the parks in the UK either. For some misguided reasons we have decided to permit it and not punish it. Police are too cowardly to stand up for public morals

Sam Crispin, Shanghai,

Richard Fowler,

An interesting parallel you have drawn between Nazi Germany & Dubai, I don't really see the connection but then again, earlier this week, the Govt. drew an association between Islamic extremists & paedophiles. Dubai? Nazis? Terrorists? Paedophiles?

It's all the same, isn't it?

Qasim, West Midlands, UK

Peter, This couple behaved disgustingly. The worst thing is that people seem to think that their crime was also not respecting local culture. I am British and I would want them to have the same punishment if they had done this in the UK.

louise, Copenhagen,

"And how many foreign rapists, burglars, fraudsters, pimps, murderers are there in UK prisons?"

Indeed. And when they get out they get benefits, support services etc. so maybe we should deport them, just like Dubai.

Joe, Manchester,

Well said, Andrew Dobell from Hove. That contradiction also caught my eye.

Susan Thornton., Peterborough, England

Whether the law in Dubai is 'repressive' or 'right', it is the law. I bet most of the people complaining about the sentence the two involved received, are the same ones who complain about immigrants to Britain, saying 'If they come to OUR country, they should obey OUR laws!'

Richard Purdom, Durham, England

"Wendy Agnew"

Well said. Typical chattering class prejudice against "ordinary" Brit travellers from Marin. As another poster said, it's evidently alright to behave like a jackass when on an expensive skiing holiday - local sensibilities obviously don't count if you're "posh"

Homer, London,

All living things are the product of sexual behavior. It is unhealthy for society to interfere with what is natural. In fact society’s toleration of sexual behavior is a measure of how civilised and how educated its people are.

Dave Murdoch, Glasgow, Scotland

What people do in private in Muslim countries is regulated, they take away a freedom in the name of religion, they take away affection shown in public, they couple did not have sex.
If theses countries made a law you could only have sex on Friday night they would put cameras in homes and arrest you.

Peter, Hastings, UK

A great great article and the author should be congratulated for having written this. Brilliant and to the point ! whether some will like it or not - it is the truth.

Well done.

Rez, Heald Green, UK

And how many foreign rapists, burglars, fraudsters, pimps, murderers are there in UK prisons?

Richard, London, England

When in Rome..... or is that too difficult for this binge addicted me, me, me, generation to comprehend. this pair have been treated with kid gloves. A miserable example for this country and it's liberal values. Incidently John F, gay rights may be a fine thing , but sexual excess in public is not

Vic, London, England

I agree. I have left the UK to live in another country & have no intention of returning as I recognise the lovely country but not the people living there and how they live. I see Brits abroad and their behaviour is often a disgrace. It would help if UK courts took away convicted persons passports.

Graham, PEGIA, CYPRUS

Most of us do not behave in such a way. And what is it to do with muslims that are living here? If English people behave like that abroad - they should be arrested, punished and deported. It does not sit well to be told about "Brits abroad" lumping us all in the same basket - VERY RACIST!!

Wendy Agnew, Botley, Hampshire

This is nothing to do with freedom, everything to do with self discipline, sense of proportion, morals and respect for other people. All sadly lacking in our society today and mainly because they are not taught or imposed by parents.Society needs to demand a little more, freedom should be fine tuned

mike gee, bournemouth, uk

"Britains are just the Americans of Europe" - I think not. I am a Brit in New York and the indecency standards here are much stricter. For example, there is absolutely no swearing on TV allowed. In this regard, Britain has lost the plot.
By the way, agree 100% with the article.

Nigel, New York,

Ultimately the concept of freedom has come to mean having the right to please yourself at all times regardless of the feelings of anyone else. It is a purely personal version of freedom and it seems to have become synonymous with selfishness.

Ben, Hopatcong, USA

"When in Rome do as the Romans do" but "If we expect ethnic minorities here to respect the host culture, we should make sure it is worthy of respect." Either we have the right to be critical or the responsibility to adapt but you can't have it both ways.

Andrew Dobell, Hove, England

having sex on the beach means u deserve 3 months in europe? yes they where stupid if they know thats what they would get, but it says a hell of a lot more about a country that would actually put u in jail for it.

and danielle, americans came from britain not the other way round. why attack the US

will, grimsby, uk

But Minette, didn't you tell us a while back about your skiing holiday and how you and other holidaymakers were knocking back the apres ski and dancing on the tables with wild abandon? Bet the locals don't routinely do that.

Sue, Felpham,

I too have no sympathy and I notice the quote " If you don’t like the law or the culture of another country, you should stay away. " Let's have a think about that in reverse!!

John C, ripon,

Is there some good reason why the Brits have to lower their standards at home? Perhaps if expections were higher, they would be respected and behave abroad - a senior officer and 21 pages of rubbish. The police should be hauling them to jail and handing out tickets - increase revenue instantly.

rosie, Tucson, USA

It is not surprising that people behave excessively when they see the example of the snout in the trough and adulterous politicins who purport to lead us. We are as we are because thirty years of permissiveness has allowed us to be that way. No example of good behaviour is shown from any source.

John Bull, Wolverhampton,

"when in rome do as the romans "

when in nazi germany do as the nazis ? i think not.

stand up for liberty. don't betray it out of some misplaced respect for whatever dictatorship you happen to be living in !

richard fowler, shanghai, china

You say --- If you don’t like the law or the culture of another country, you should stay away. If you go there anyway, you should keep your views to yourself and when in Rome behave as the Romans.

But why when I hear this in Britain it is a racist term?

Pete, Vancouver, Canada

This is not just a Muslim hangup. Let's face it - none of us want to take our family to a public beach and see a couple of 30-somethings (yes, they are old enough to know better) having a special moment. Pallid and doughy - ugggh!

Angela, Epping, Australia

Don't forget that this permissiveness which you decry has given us tolerance for gay rights - a measure of progress completely unimaginable in any majority-Muslim country.

John F, London,

Minette

Thank you for this excellent article. I agree with all you say. Even the word freedom is now abused in how we manifest it in our actions. We have the audacity to criticise other cultures who come to our country ignorant of our law and tradition, while we go and disrespect theirs.
Thanks.

Neville Moniz, Reading, UK

Britons are just the Americans of Europe. Sad, really.

Danielle, ascot,