Vote for your Favourite Beauty Products
You may have read this story in one of your papers and sighed a little and perhaps wished ill-fortune on the petty, mean-minded, self-important bureaucrats who run our local councils, and particularly Hinckley and Bosworth borough council. Or you might have thought the story so absurd that the journalist made it up.
Today I can reveal the other side to the story, the council’s side. And the great thing is that it makes the council look even more fatuous than it did last Thursday when Tierney contacted his local newspaper to complain about the fine.
The council now alleges that Tierney did not deposit just two letters in the litter bin, but a whole sack of “domestic rubbish”. Tierney denies the imputation: “They’re just trying to save face. They’ve been made to look stupid, so they come up with this. Why didn’t they say that on Thursday?”
Quite; but more to the point, how did they know that this black bag full of “domestic rubbish” had been deposited by Tierney — unless, that is, they pay someone to rifle through the garbage with the sole purpose of persecuting rubbish-placement transgressors? Well, of course, on cross-examination it transpires that this is exactly what they spend your council tax on. Rubbish placement transgressor inspectors.
“If we find a black bin bag in a litter bin, we will sift through the rubbish and attempt to identify who put it there,” a council employee told me, with great patience, as if this were a perfectly reasonable thing to do. “A refuse disposal man will identify a black bag and then report it to his supervisor and a decision will be made to examine the contents of the bag and, upon identifying the miscreant, issue a fixed penalty notice.” You couldn’t make this up and, luckily, I didn’t have to.
There are other eternally vigilant people employed by Hinckley and Bosworth borough council whose job it is to persecute the residents who pay their wages. These are called neighbourhood wardens — “the eyes and ears of the local community”, according to the council spokeswoman.
It was one of these individuals who espied Tierney putting some litter in a bin and quickly filed a report. So they have people paid to walk the streets and make sure you don’t put letters in a litter bin and other people employed to sift through your rubbish and fine you if you do. Possibly people like you and I, possibly weird people whom you would not wish to sit next to at dinner.
The average council tax charge in Hinckley and Bosworth is £1,242.97 a year. Council tax charges have risen by about 100% nationally over the past decade. This is a small price for such extraordinary vigilance, such devotion to the cause. Quite what the cause is remains a mystery.
We are all of us subjected to a daily procession of small-scale miseries, visited upon us by a plethora of self-important statutory authorities. We cry when presented with our outrageous council tax bills and then cry louder when presented with the fruits of such expenditure; the bone-jarring humps in the road, the one-way systems, the salaries of Puerto Rican gay and lesbian community outreach workers, the obligation to separate our household waste into three neat piles, the penalties for transgressing a whole new bunch of rules and the severe warnings as to what will happen to you if, out of frustration, you verbally abuse or lamp some dull-witted, sententious council employee who is towing your car away because you exceeded the time allowed on the parking meter by 32 seconds, the police investigating somebody because he once said he doesn’t much like homosexuals, or Muslims, or Muslim homosexuals.
Recently a chap called Simon Thompson was fined £80 for having displayed a wearily raised middle finger to an inanimate object — a speed camera. You’re nicked, Mr Thompson, matey, under the Public Order Act. So not only must you never transgress the rules, you must not insult the technology employed to enforce the rules either.
Part of this may be down to a an over-abundance of elected institutions which, shorn of real decision-making powers, begin to throw their weight around over the most minuscule issues. They lose sight of the point that local people pay them to dispose of their trash, full stop — and start worrying about different kinds of rubbish and kinds of bins and employ strange people to police the whole thing.
Tierney has no intention of paying his £50 fine, I’m delighted to say. One hopes the whole thing ends up in the European Court of Human Rights, with evidence provided by those neighbourhood wardens and the council people paid to sift through the rubbish. The more absurd these officials appear — and the greater the publicity given to their spite — the more likely are the rest of us to rise up in arms against them. Good luck, Mr Tierney.
Rod Liddle left his post as editor of the BBC's Today programme in 2002, after a row about impartiality in an article he wrote for The Guardian. He was formerly a speechwriter for the Labour Party. As well as writing for The Sunday Times, he contributes to The Spectator and Country Life and presents current affairs documentaries on television
Industry sectors news at a glance. Interactive heatmap, video and podcast
Get ready for the winter sports season, with our resort guides and snow reports
We are backing British business, what is the confidence of the nation and what businesses are succeeding?
In this special section we explore a different way to enjoy Las Vegas
An island of beauty and contrast, this unspoilt Mediterranean isle is the perfect holiday destination
Enjoy further reading from Travel to Fashion, Business to Sport, discover more
2010
£110,950
Oakham
2010
£109,390
Derby
The best policy at the
best price
Be Wiser Insurance
2009
£24,995
Circa £4k pa
Sentinel
Basingstoke, London
C.200K PA+PERF. RELATED PAY
Wandsworth Borough Council
London
Competitive
MERC Partners
Ireland
£32,000 - £35,000 per annum
Cheltenham Festivals
Cheltenham
Enjoy an exquisite location at the foot of Diamond Head in a traditional Hawaiian beach house lifestyle.
£6,593,400 GBP
Award-winning riverside development, SW11.
Luxury apartments for sale from £350,000.
Find out more about our luxurious apartments and houses for sale in the heart of Sussex.
-30% off key ready properties in Cyprus with guaranteed fast and easy finance. Prices from 89,000 Euros!
Includes flights, private transfers and 9 nights’ accommodation with FREE breakfast and room upgrade in KL
For the best Mediterranean, Caribbean & Last Minute cruise deals visit IgluCruise now.
Cruise from only £59 per night!
£200 discount per couple on all packages for completed stays between 7th April-20th June 2010.
Chef, maid & babysitter easily arranged. Book with the specialists.
Contact our advertising team for advertising and sponsorship in Times Online, The Times and The Sunday Times, or place your advertisement.
Times Online Services: Dating | Jobs | Property Search | Used Cars | Holidays | Births, Marriages, Deaths | Subscriptions | E-paper
News International associated websites: Milkround
Copyright 2010 Times Newspapers Ltd.
This service is provided on Times Newspapers' standard Terms and Conditions. Please read our Privacy Policy.To inquire about a licence to reproduce material from Times Online, The Times or The Sunday Times, click here.This website is published by a member of the News International Group. News International Limited, 1 Virginia St, London E98 1XY, is the holding company for the News International group and is registered in England No 81701. VAT number GB 243 8054 69.