The new pet of choice, it seems, is the wallaby. If you are surprised, you still would not be half as surprised as the British wallaby farmers who are witnessing a leap in growth for the little bounders as domestic pets (see page 9). Their traditional, and modest market, has been zoos and small parks seeking something to divert visitors.

But owners, from the Scottish borders down to Kent, appreciate the fact that the wallaby does not bark, and it crops the lawn. It is a social creature and likes to gather in mobs; which is why you must buy a pair (you must also have an enclosed area with walls at least 6ft high, to stop foxes getting in and wallabies vaulting out; unless, maybe, you need them to hop into the neighbour’s garden to retrieve your ball). In America, which started the trend, wallabies are promenaded on leads. And compared to pedigree dogs, they are not that pricey: £150 will get you a male wallaby. The females start at £600.

The United Kingdom, a nation of animal-lovers, always has room for another pet. The dog is the oldest domestic pet, having lived with Man for 15 millennia, according to the bone-pits. But John Sparrow, the Oxford academic, described the dog as an indefatigable and unsavoury engine of pollution. Wallabies, being herbivores, generate less offensive manure.

Cats have their fans — Ancient Egyptians worshipped them — but many dislike their attitude to birds. A horse is dangerous at both ends and uncomfortable in the middle. Gerbils are dull.

So welcome aboard the English Ark, Wallaby. So long as you do not escape your welcome, as grey squirrels have here, and rabbits in your native land, and become a pest, not a pet.