And now, after those sage words on China and Japan, it’s time for this. Or perhaps you are turning to the bottom of the page first and are (understandably) saving the heavier stuff above for later. Either way, we’re here to guide you through your reading experience as seamlessly and engrossingly as possible, while entertaining you along the way, we hope! Much like the BBC. We don’t want to lose you between articles just as the Beeb doesn’t want to lose you between programmes. But we lack the creative juices of the corporation’s continuity department.

For years it has filled the dead time between programmes with dancers and daredevils, drifting balloons, rotating globes and other assorted diversions. BBC One aims to change gear from the seriously funny to the serious without its audience slipping off, dropping off or turning off. The viewers are moved on without realising they have turned a page. Now a new generation of “idents” to provide the padding will feature hippos swimming, children playing and an apartment building.

Yet this emphasis on continuity is misplaced. And not simply because it is time-consuming, or visually vacuous, or cost £1.2 million of licence payers’ money, or comes with a load of explanatory twaddle about circles representing “community and unity”, or requires the involvement of Carlos “Coco” Nogales, Mexico’s leading big-wave “tow-in” surfer.

The point is that continuity misses the point. Life is full of gaps. Every sentence requires punctuation. The pretence of seamlessness is unseemly. Still with us? Good. And now for something completely different.