As Malvolio might have discovered in a more contemporary context, some pop lyrics are born great, some achieve greatness through the manner of their delivery, some have greatness thrust upon them by the internet . . . and some get a literary leg-up from Shakespeare.

I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor, by the Arctic Monkeys, falls into the latter two categories. Heavy e-turnout by the Arctics’ net-savvy fanbase is surely the main reason for the song’s current No 1 ranking in a search for the greatest pop lyric of all time. And if you suggested such a thing to a gathering of the faithful they would doubtless quote, in unison, as proof of the song’s pedigree and timelessness, the following stran- gulated couplet: “Oh there int [sic] no love no, Montagues or Capulets / Just banging tunes in DJ sets . . .”

As we report today, this reference to Romeo and Juliet’s warring clans has led to debate on whether Britain’s new “pop sensation” might have accepted some “assistance” with their pre-tentious lyrics. What these wimpish whippersnappers plainly lack is the Cowardian wit of “Monkeys whenever you look do it”. Or the sublime: “Mr Irving Berlin/ Often emphasises sin.”

So, what of the genius of Cole Porter? The inspired melancholic madness of I Get A Kick Out of You captures a doomed infatuation that eclipses all else: “I get no kick from champagne/ Mere alcohol doesn’t thrill me at all.” And if it must be contemporary music, surely none is greater than those words of Nick Cave: “Despair and Deception, Love’s Ugly little twins/ Came a-knocking on my door, I let them in.”