EVERY YEAR we’re bombarded with red roses, chocolates and every kind of ephemeral tat. And it’s very much the urbane thing to dismiss it as trite and over commercialised . . .

But, oh, wouldn’t you just weep if you were given one of the rarest, most precious, pure things the earth has to offer — a diamond? But how does that token of love end up dangling from your ears?

In recent years conflict diamonds worth billions of dollars have been traded by warlords and armed groups in countries such as Angola, the Democratic Republic of Congo, Liberia and Sierra Leone, to buy guns that have been turned on civilians. Diamonds didn’t cause those wars, but they added great fuel to the fire in conflicts that would not otherwise have lasted so long or seen so many millions of people die.

Exposure of these issues has been a PR nightmare for the diamond industry. So much so that in 2003 diamond-producing and trading countries established an international certification scheme called the Kimberley Process, and the diamond industry promised to provide conflict-free warranties right up to the point of sale.

Despite these commitments the trade continues. The pressure group Global Witness has discovered that conflict diamonds are still reaching the international market, for example stones being mined now in Ivory Coast, which is in the midst of conflict.

There is something chilling about wearing a sign of love that is the product of other people’s misery. But you don’t have to be a puritan and do without. Amnesty International and Global Witness have produced a “shoppers guide” to conflict diamonds that tells you what you need to know, and what to ask when you go to the jewellers: “Where are your diamonds from? Can I see your policy on conflict diamonds? Can you show me a guarantee that your suppliers are not using conflict diamonds?” If they can’t answer your questions go somewhere else and tell them why.

Worries about consumer confidence made producer countries and the diamond industry promise to clean up this trade. So when you shop for a diamond ask about the “4 Cs” — Cut, Colour, Clarity, Carat — but add a fifth: Conflict. Diamonds may be expensive, but they shouldn’t cost lives.

Kate Allen is UK Director of Amnesty International