Tony Drury, from Acton, West London, asks when he should start calling his girlfriend’s parents by their first names.

We live in a casual age, when many call each other by their first names as soon as they meet. But many of the old school are sensitive about being addressed by their first names. I should stick to Sir, Mrs Girlfriend and Er-Um until they invite you to first-name them. If ever. PH

David Agress, Newport Beach, California: “Only when you start dating girls whose parents are younger than you are. And then, only if you’ve got any strength left.”

Lulu Larkin, Eastbourne: “My advice would be when they invite you to do so. Until then, be your charming, polite and deferential self. You sound perfect son-in-law material.”

Peter Rushforth, Cullingworth, Yorkshire: “Never! It does not show the necessary respect. Etiquette standards are falling, regrettably.”

Malcolm Penny, High Wycombe, Bucks: “Be led by the girl-friend, as you will be through life.”

Catherine Harden, Reigate, Surrey: “When invited. Be patient. My husband waited 25 years.”

— Readers are invited to send their responses to this week’s question by May 10. A selection will be printed in a fortnight.

Is it good manners to close one’s menu to let the waiter know that one is ready?
— Simon Peel, New Zealand

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