Frank Lock, of Ipswich, wants to know what to wear to a wedding when he has been given no dress code.

Elegant Alcibiades! Traditional gent’s wear for a posh wedding is morning dress: black morning coat and striped trousers or, sometimes, black and white checked trousers. A black top hat is common and yellow chamois gloves are correct. Shoes should be black patent leather or calf Oxford, and a plain coloured doeskin weskit, a white shirt with stiff collar. But vestimentary “rules” have relaxed, for the better. A gent can wear a lounge suit to a wedding, but he should make an effort with a pretty waistcoat and tie. He should dress up and put on a bit of style to honour his friends’ great leap into the dark. PH

David Agress, Newport Beach, California: “As Bertie Wooster would advise — it is most important, however the proceedings go, and whatever your personal feelings may be — that you ‘wear the mask’.”

Elizabeth Ambler, Exeter: “Whatever you wear will be enhanced tenfold by a joyous heart and happy smile.”

Tim Mickleburgh, Grimsby: “In the absence of instructions, wear a dark suit and tie.”

Readers are invited to send their responses to this week’s question by December 6. A selection will be printed in a fortnight.

I seem to have offended a friend. I have no idea how. What can I do?

William Howard, Cambridge

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