Are you allowed to use a straw?

doug lominac, chicago, USA Illinois

If this is all society has to worry about, then we're doing pretty good. Why not ask all the punks with knives who are usually busy stabbing everyone if, when at afternoon tea, they hold their cups properly, stir from six o'clock to twelve, or dunk their digestives. I'm sure this is a most pressing issue.

This sounds to me more like an establishment catering to a bunch of young 30 somethings who want-to-be-gentry trying to act the part rather than actually being it. Like leasing an expensive sports car for show while living in a one room flat.

Good manners are a hallmark of proper upbringing and any establishment which truly caters to such individuals has no need of a policy of enforcement other than a dress code. It is conduct which is simply expected and adhered to without conscious thought.

Furthermore, proper etiquette requires a host to refrain from calling attention to a deficiency in the manners of any guest so as not to embarrass or make the guest uncomfortable.

Scott, Durham, NC, USA

Tea fascism - just what we don't need.

Anyway, it is well known that tea is best drunk very strong with plenty of sugar from an enamel mug, accompanied by a doorstep-sized bacon sandwich.

Peter Lewiston, London, England

Blowing on one's tea is pointless. A faster cooling method is to pour it into the saucer, and drinking it from there.

George Purnell, Caistorville, Canada

Well, you know the rules. If you accept them, go there. If you do not, go another place. It is quite easy.

Pakito, Yakarta, Malaysia

Dunking Biscuits is a bit like,
well,
picking your nose, because some people don't mind what you're doing and some do. Personally I don't think dunking biscuits is rude, but again it depends how you do it and when you're doing it. Say I come and sit at the same table as you in a cafe and start slowly dunking a biscuit into a cup of tea/coffee and then slowly sucking then finally biting it and finish with a horrible Gordon Brown like smile that makes you feel all awkward and sick - How would you feel?!
But again, there are much nicer ways to do it.

Felix, age 9, London,

Certainly high tea involves something a little more substantial than tea and biscuits. At the Dorchester I always like the eggs benedict. And as for trying to create the experience of afternoon tea at the Ritz, the Ritz does not serve tea with biscuits, as I recall, but rather with sandwiches and cakes, all of which are non-dunkable. Mr Daly’s prohibition of dunking seems to me to be an affectation of gentility by one who is not a gentleman ( I can hear my own mother now saying “Don’t dunk! It’s common!”). Actually there are some biscuits that really have to be dunked or they are simply too hard – rich tea for example. And personally I find that a very swift dip improves a digestive no end. My Taiwanese wife, however, has never learned the art of the lightening dunk and the results of her experimentation have often been distressing.

Laurence Eyton, Taipei, Taiwan

A silly piece of attention-grabbing in an ovecrowded market, or an even sillier piece of meddlesome, fuss-pot control-freakery. Good manners ought to mean simply showing consideration for others. It's depressing that this chap and others seem to think it also means pettifogging rules that no sane person would care about. No blowing on your tea indeed! And why anyone should get a serious bee in their bonnet about dunking biscuits defeats me.

I'd happily go to a cafe/bar/restaurant that insisted I switch off my mobile, since loud rings etc intrude on everyone around you. I'd rather sit outside in the rain than enter a place that was so up itself that you were barred from blowing on a hot drink or dunking a biscuit if you chose to.

Mark, Worthing, UK

Mr. Daly mentions "high tea at the Ritz". Possibly terminology has changed since I lived in England, but my childhood memories of Yorkshire are of high tea being an early-evening, substantial, 'knife and fork' hot meal. It was, admittedly, usually called simply "tea" and served with great mugs of the heavenly brew (and unlikely to be the sort of meal served at the Ritz). I think that what Mr. Daly is trying to emulate is (or used to be called) "afternoon tea". Either way, I think the aim should be to enjoy the tea experience in all its forms.

Eileen, Portland, US

It's tacky if you don't do it right!

Felix, age 9, London,

I gave up dunking biscuits in tea , it is disgusting ... not because it is bad manners but because it leaves remnants in the bottom of your cup that make finishing your tea almost impossible . Unless of course you like a thick brown sludge at the bottom of your cup .

Benzo, Nr Chelmsford,

Rules are rules so obey them. I do not understand the idea from the US that the spout should face the pourer. The idea of serving is economy and safety of movement. IE time for chat or quiet contemplation of a fine brew. Spout nearside suggests moving pots awkwardly and too much fuss. I have the pot spout to left (right handed) but not if steam prevents seing someone, although this is often desired. What is the US rational for this? As for the idea of watching someone fuss with a wet biscuit or worse see them tilt the head like a performing seal - not on.

Tam Shepherd, Glasgow,

I drink tea by the pint from a pyrex jug.

Alfonso Parelli, London, UK

This is just a gimmick isn't it?? It is definitely good to use 'good manners' at all times, but this just takes the biscuit!!

christine, London, UK

Oh the humanity!!!

Tim Boddy, London,

I have read this article with a sense of admiration. Ufortunately there are still persons who think that drinking a cup of tea is like drinking a Coca Cola., but this mostly happens not in the UK but in countries with less civilisation. For me the five o'clock tea is a must, if around that time I happen to be out I rush to return home to have a proper tea, properly prepared. Frequently I have my tea alone as my wife is not keen about it ( this is certainly a handicap but after due consideration of the pro and contra I decided not to divorce ) , but stll I take it served same if I wear at the Ritz. Obviosly I don't use tea-bags. The point for which I have to apologize is that I have to dunk biscuits because same as another reader I had cancer at the throat and cannot swallow dry things. I hope Mr. Daly wll forgive me should I one day have the fortune to sit for a good cup of tea at his place.

Roberto Castellano, Salsomaggiore, Italy

Have you SEEN the interior of his place? Full of cheap kitsch and geegaws, the sort of tat you buy at car boot sales.

And he objects to my dunking my biscuit?

He'll last a few months - if that.

Allan, Cwoling,

I fully agree with Mr. Daly, drinking tea is not like drinking CocaCola, certain rules have to be strictly followed. I now live on the hills near Parma but I haven't forgotten the proper rules. Even if I am on my own at tea time ( my wife is not keen about tea but after due consideration about the pro and contra I have decided not to divorce in spite of this) I take it following all the rules with one exception. I have the same problem as Linda Page having been affected by cancer at the throat and I cannot swallow anything too dry. This is force majeur and I am sure Mr. Daly would therefore accept me in his place which I would love to see.

Roberto Castellano, Salsomaggiore, Italy

I have had cancer and as a result cannot eat a biscuit without dunking it due to having a dry mouth and difficulty swallowing. I think Mr Daly is a miserable killjoy. Disability apart, dunking biscuits is one of life's pleasures. Learn to let go and live a little, Mr Daly. Life is too short not to.

Linda Page, Grantham, England

Life. Look it up. Then get one.

Chris, Slough,

'The customer is always right' is a rule that this Mr. Daly would be well advised to bear in mind. If he continues to impose arbitrary rules on his customers, they will soon cease to patronise his shop. Rather than say, 'Let's go to Daly's, it's so refined', we will say, Let's not go there, the proprietor is an overbearing pig'.
If I were told by him to leave, for breaking one of his rules, I would be likely to say, ' You have a choice - if I must leave now, I won't pay your bill.' Since when have these petty and snobbish rules ever been observed, whether or not under duress?

John Small, Harrow , Middlesex., England, UK

Good god I truely hate agreeing with Americans, but I just have to because Adrian from Fremont is absolutely 100% correct. I am all in favour of manners. If a tea room wants people to keep the noise down, fine, dress reasonably repectably, lovely. However I feel that the whole business of etiquette has nothing at all to do with manners and everything to do with creating a list of silly rules to make yourself seem important.

I play cricket and as such know a great deal about immensly complicated little understand arbitrary rules and regulations. I do not however laugh at or single out those not lucky enough to understand them as I do. To do such a thing is, well, it's just not cricket!

Dave, worthing, uk

I am planning to go to UK the coming spring, and this tea house seems to be an interesting place, worth visiting.

However, metal cans as shown on the picture are not proper vessels for serving tea. But I can take that and the horrid plastic tray to see if I can stand the exam. If so, I will ask for a nice diploma of proper tea tea drinking.

Peter, Örebro, Sweden

Well done David Daly an out of the box thinker with vision. Any thing that brings back some traditional British Class, Manners, etiquette, respect and passion for a good cuppa is fine with me.

I applaud what this gentleman is creating.

Stuart Robinson, ottawa, ontario canada

The proper, old-fashioned English view of manners is that the guest, or in this case the customer, is always correct and should never be made to feel uncomfortable. There is a story of how, at a tea with a Prince, a country man in attendence poured his tea into his saucer to cool it. Other people there laughed at him, making him feel ill at ease. In response, the Prince poured his own tea into his saucer, thereby putting his guest at ease and showing impeccable manners.

Emily, London, UK

Sukey take it off again, they've all gone away....

Hotspur, NY NY , US

Place looks more At Home with the Steptoes than tea at the Ritz.

Sam Beau, UK,

"Mr Daly would agree with all of that, but there is a divergence of opinion over the position of the little finger. He disapproves of raising it while the cup is brought to the lips, but the American view is that it is acceptable to continue a tradition born of the need for balance in the days before tea cups had handles."

I don't get this at all...when I drink from a vessel without a handle, I don't have any difficulty balancing it. One just has to grip it firmly around the outside. In fact holding the cup by a handle on one side strikes me as being considerably more problematic in terms of balance.

Ed W, London,

Very comforting the tradition of tea is alive and well in Britain.

I was in England a few months ago, first time in 10 years and was taken aback by so many Starbucks.

We are plagued in modern society by disposable, on the go characterless, coffee/tea cafes - thank you for taking the time to acknowledge David Daly's endeavors, allegiances and visions.

He is maintaining and adding to an art form that is not rewarded in monetary means nor acceptance by all but by the people that get this civility, nourishment and grace we dig you David.

jodi holiday, new york, ny

What petty snobbery..

T Reynolds, Cardiff, Wales

That place will go bust very quickly, because people simply don't like to be told what they can and can't do when it comes to services they're paying for.

Simon Taylor, boston, UK

It's about time proper standards were returned to The Tea Shop. . My mother would have had a fit if she had seen me dunking anything into her tea cups. Good for you Mr Daly. If I am ever in Brighton I will make your tea room the first stop.

Joanne Elkington, Letchworth Garden City, UK

When I had the pleasure of living in Surrey about 10 years ago, I made sure I took the opportunity to have morning tea at the Ritz. It was a lovely experience, all I could wish for, except... I was shocked to discover the tea in the pot was teabags! Twinings maybe, but still not REAL tea. In all the time I was there, even at the Royal Garden Party I was privileged to attend, we were served teabag tea. At least we Colonials can still make a decent cuppa with real tea!

Carmel, Adelaide, Australia

On my desert island, tea would be the one thing I would need as my luxury, so I applaud Mr Daly's enthusiasm for it. However, assuming his teashop has separate tables, I really can't see why dunking your biscuit should upset anybody. I don't think I could relax over my cuppa with him watching me like a hawk for any transgression of his rules.

Barry, Wallington, UK

The Ritz would never serve tea on the tray David is holding in your photograph. Blue with white spots!

Dawn, Nottingham,

True bad manners involves making your guests feel uncomfortable. Asking them to leave because they do not appreciate or follow all of your rules is not classy, it is rude

Adrian, Fremont, CA

Yes but what about the plastic tray!? I mean come on ...if you want everyone to abide by the rules dont serve tea from a plastic tray its tacky!

Amanda, Hebden Bridge, West Yorkshire

Do not hold the cup with your pinky pointing out.

Michael Strelitz, London,

Well done David Daly an out of the box thinker with vision. Any thing that brings back some traditional British Class, Manners, etiquette, respect and passion for a good cuppa is fine with me.

I applaud what this gentleman is creating.

Stuart Robinson, ottawa, ontario canada

Having spent my early years in Boston, with ,my Boston Brahmin Grandmother every Saturday afternoon drinking tea at the Ritz, It was the most pleasureable time of my youth.

The article stresses everything my Grandmother taught me, how nice there is still a Tea Tradition around. Bravo!!

People acutally dunked their biscuts at tea? Impossible! The mind boggles!

Howard Lewis, Beverly Hills , California

how to get a free cup of tea: order tea and biscuits, drink 90% of the tea, eat 90% of the biscuits and dunk the last bit in the tea. If you then get ejected from the tea rooms, refuse to pay...

ewan, sherborne,

If he is wishing to emulate the Ritz, why in the picture that has been printed in this article is tea being served from what i assume to be silver teapots on a blue plastic tray - does spoil the effect somewhat!

Trudy, Cornwall, UK

Being an American who's lived in England for six months now, I enjoy nice tea rooms and places here MUCH MORE than I EVER did in the US. It IS more relaxed here, and makes for a MUCH MORE ENJOYABLE experience.

Brooke, sheffield, UK

This sounds great! It's about basic courtesy and manners - if you can't relax without being a mobile-addicted slob, stick to Starbucks. Do they also ban MP3's being played at full blast by head-bobbing, blank-faced droolers? Please say yes!

Annie, london,

Sounds like some Monty Python creation...would love to know if there's a penalty for asking to have milk with your Earl Grey!

Whilst I'm not a regular customer of the Ritz or Cafe Royal, the few top-notch establishments that I have been to seem to be alot more laid-back. Places like the Savoy or Raymond Blanc's restaurant in Oxfordshire seem to encourage you to relax and feel comfortable...what's the point in blowing a week's wages in one day if you can't be yourself and enjoy it?

John Robinson, Thetford, UK

I love tea ceremony any all i collects porcelain teapots and cups...i ussually brew all sort of tea in them...only for my green pu erh i use my yixing pots from www.teacuppa.com

Mary, GB,

Interesting..

Sue, GB,