Stefanie Marsh
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This is not usually a campaigning sort of section, but news that Britons are now too busy, lazy, tired or thick to peel oranges has forced us to come out in support of the unwieldy dinosaur of the citrus world.
Several reports this week have alerted us to that fact that sales of oranges have plummeted for the third year running because peeling an orange is now considered too time-consuming. And because they drip all over your keyboard, and make your hands sticky, and give off such a powerful scent that someone asks “Who's been eating an orange?” and you end up justifying to a colleague, neighbour or spouse an act that should in ideal circumstances be private.
A survey that we dug up from three years ago also revealed that 7 per cent of children between the ages of 9 and 13 are clueless about how to eat an orange. Their parents are too busy to peel them and too busy to pass on the craft of orange-peeling to the next generation.
As a result, sales of oranges fell by two per cent over the past 12 months - the third year of decline in a row - to 598 million. Over the same period, consumption of easy-to-peel fruit such as satsumas and tangerines rose by 35 per cent and 60 per cent respectively.
“I think the reason for the change is to do with the size and weight of oranges,” says Marius du Plessis, of the fruit importer Mehadrin Tnuport Marketing. "You can pick up an 800g bag of clementines and it is enough to last you a few days, whereas oranges are more bulky.” Other commentators have pointed to the invincible rise in popularity of the banana and that, on average, people in Britain take no longer than 15 minutes for lunch.
In the interest of preserving the orange from further decline, here is our foolproof guide to peeling them.
How to peel an orange quickly yet pretentiously
Equipment: one orange, one sharp knife, one metal tablespoon
1. Have an orange of your choice ready for peeling.
2. Briskly roll it around on a flat surface to loosen the skin and make it easier to peel.
3. Make a small incision into the side of the orange with your sharp knife. Do not pierce the flesh, as you'll get juice everywhere and become a tangerine or blueberry convert.
4. Insert a metal spoon beneath the peel through the gap made by the knife.
5. Slide the spoon around under the peel and remove the peel in several large sections.
6. Eat orange
How to peel an orange in one piece (amaze your dimmer colleagues and young children with this little-known technique)
Equipment: one orange, one relatively sharp thumbnail
1. and 2. As before.
3. Dig your thumb about an inch below the little button where the stalk used to be. When your thumb has penetrated beneath the peel, rotate your thumb in a counterclockwise downward spiral.
4. Don't rush, or you'll botch it.
5. Think of your thumb as a crank-operated potato peeler.
6. Continue until the bottom of the orange then pop the flesh out from the peel.
7. Eat orange.
(Some people like to show off their ability to to peel an orange in one piece by using the peel as a decorative item. You may do so only if it is Christmas time and you are Amish.)
How to peel an orange (traditional)
Equipment: one orange, one sharp knife
1. and 2. As before.
3. Score the orange into quarters with a small sharp knife, just through the skin. Then peel off the quarters. (If you've been to finishing school and want the world to know, prepare for step three by ostentatiously chopping off your orange's “nipple” and “navel” with your knife).
4. Eat orange.
How to quarter an orange
Equipment: one orange, one football match
1. Buy an orange.
2. Cut it in half with a penknife that you haven't had confiscated by security. Then cut it in half again.
3. Wait for half-time.
4. Eat orange
Alternatively, go to a Chinese restaurant. They'll do it for you.
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