Britain's best-known woman chef is on a hell of a roll. Only a month ago the subtle glass chandeliers at her Mayfair restaurant Murano by Angela Hartnett began sparkling over the first 40 customers. Since the critics came and raved there's been a two-week wait for a table. Next week, York & Albany, a restaurant, bar, deli and townhouse hotel - her second project in partnership with Gordon Ramsay - opens in North London. In between she managed to fit in a 40th birthday party - “I would have cancelled if the reviews had been crap” - a characteristically unpretentious get together of family and friends at her East London home.

Who said cooking is a young man's game? Probably her notoriously alpha-male mentor. Literate, sociable and well adjusted, Hartnett has a degree in modern languages, no formal training, and an honour from the Queen. She says she's not an exception. I'd say she's wrong there.

What's less unusual is that she comes from an Italian catering background; her grandfather and both his brothers ran fish and chips shops and her grandmother was born in Emilia Romagna the gastronomic heartland of northern Italy. Hartnett, the middle child of three, first made pasta at the age of 10. Women are still under-represented at the top level of cooking and there's no easy way to get there, but hers was a route only the toughest men survive. She worked under Ramsay back in the days when he dismissed women as impossible for a week a month, to become one of the elite band of chefs he installs in restaurants of their own.

Through it all she seemed to keep a sense of proportion about the cooking game. She says Marcus Wareing, who was once Ramsay's familiar and has now fallen out with the ubiquitous sweary one, used to laugh at her for slipping into Waterstone's to read during kitchen breaks. She doesn't do slavish, but her loyalty to Ramsay is unswerving.

“He's much more of a manager, motivator and leader. If I hadn't met Gordon I probably wouldn't be at the level I am. I don't think I'd have been as ambitious.” When she was 34 she took over the kitchens of the deeply traditional Connaught hotel, introducing an Italian menu and replacing a Frenchman who'd been there 25 years. She won a Michelin star. She'd like one of those for Murano too.

As a child in Essex there were always olives and spinach and potato torta to snack on. Her close-knit family is bound together by good food. “My mum was up at the weekend and she always brings loads,” Hartnett laughs.

An uncle and cousin live close by the East London house that she shares with her younger sister Anne. She visits her New York-based brother, sister-in-law and their sons as often as she can. “We always ate well, my mum never restricted us, we had sweets and chocolate but because we had good food we never craved rubbish. My nephews are the same, no question; they would never refuse an apple.”

Desert island dining for her is salami and prosciutto, followed by anolini (mini ravioli filled with veal, breadcrumbs and Parmesan) and spinach and ricotta tortelli (more pasta), culminating with roast pork and beef. How healthy is that? “That's your ideal meal, isn't it?” Anyway, she insists, “I don't eat rubbish, I do eat vegetables, there's fruit around. I don't eat loads of red meat, I probably eat more chicken.” Italian food is what she eats and she cooks. At Murano she's serving “a lovely basic risotto with some pesto. You can't get more simple than that. Beats anything”. There's even a meat-free menu, which given her business partner Ramsay's opinion of vegetarians, is as good an indication of her independence and strength of character as any. Her weakness is for savoury tastes. “Bread and cheese, carbs and pasta, all the stuff that's delicious. But you shouldn't eat too much of it, especially late at night.”

Late nights, early mornings, stress and gruelling conditions go with the chef territory. Though working practices, hours and salaries - and tempers - have improved, she says, it doesn't get easier. “As I get older I don't want to be working hideous hours. I'm not going to go back to eight days a week.” After the first few weeks back running a restaurant she says, “it has been tiring but it's amazing how resilient your body can be”.

The ability to delegate is essential

She's at the level where delegating is essential and has trusted head chefs running her restaurants. “I manage people and you have to train them otherwise you'd struggle to get a day off.” No, she hasn't modelled her management style on her mentor's, though she admits she doesn't want to be thought of as a soft touch because she's a woman. “I probably don't appear as aggressive as Gordon because he's a bloke, but I can get hacked off. I've learnt to control my temper but I can still lose it.” Her head chef Diego Cardoso describes her as a mother figure and only tough in service because she has to be.

Hartnett's sister works in human resources. They don't talk about work much at home. And the chef does try to keep her swearing under control. “I don't like it. When women swear it sounds worse than when a bloke swears. I think that's a sexist thing to say, but it's very true.”

It's a boozy world and in the past she's drunk more than she should, “without a doubt”. Advancing years have put a stop to that. “I can't wake up having had anything to drink and feel human the next day.” Does she drink within the guidelines now? What are they, she asks? Well, actually, since you mention it, she does.

Hyped up by a frantic night's work, the temptation is to party hard to wind down afterwards. Nowadays Hartnett heads straight home by bike. “It relaxes you, you cool down and by the time you get home, you're exhausted, have a shower and you're ready for bed.” Walking her dog Alfie at weekends helps keep her fit too. Though she'd like to weigh less - “I'm never going to be a size 8, you hit a certain age and it's harder to shift it” - that's as far as exercise goes.

A chef's schedule doesn't exactly encourage sensible eating habits either. Since Ramsay's team left The Connaught 18 months ago, Hartnett's has had time away from the relentless regime of running a restaurant in which to establish new ones. Breakfast, for example.

Late to bed, early to rise

Where once if it was a choice between an extra 15 minutes in bed and something to eat, she'd move the alarm forward, now she's starting the day with muesli and coffee. Time will tell whether her resolve will outlast the two restaurant openings as she admits she needs more sleep now than she used to. “When I first worked for Gordon I could go to bed at 2am and be up by 6. I can't do it now. Everyone says as you get older you're supposed to enjoy less sleep but I can't, I've gone the other way.” Not enough time spent lying down and too much standing up - that takes its toll. “I wouldn't like to see many men chefs' legs in shorts because I'm sure they're hideous. Mine looked like snakes and ladders and I had an operation for the spider veins.” She's avoided back trouble - maybe it helps being in a minority. “I'm not going to pretend that I want to pick up a big pot when a guy who's 6ft tall and next to me can do it. Why should I break my back? We have to be realistic about what the sexes deliver. I get annoyed if I see a bloke trying to pick something up that's too heavy because it's macho.

She denies she's had to sacrifice friendships or relationships and believes family, health and happiness count more than anything. “If my brother needed help with the kids that would be more important than the restaurant.” What about children of her own? “You never know, I'm only just 40,” Angela Hartnett, MBE. laughs.

Murano by Angela Hartnett, 20 Queen Street, London, W1J 5PR; (020-7592 1222)

York & Albany, 127-129 Parkway, London, NW1 7PS; (020-7388 3344)

Explore Food & Drink

• Gordon Ramsay

• Heston Blumenthal

• Recipes

• Wine

• Real Food

• Drinks

• Anjum Anand

• Eating Out

• Video Recipes

Times Recommends

• Top Ten most searched for recipes
• Chalet Chef 2010: the winning menus
• Gin and pomegranate jellies