Sports Calendar

Esther had a kedgeree that was all rice, mounds of the stuff, positive dunes, the sort of quantity you could bag up and drop over Darfur, with not as much fish or egg as you’d like, and a rather dry, choking curry effect. But my Brompton Fish Stew was a stunning bowlful of rich, amber soup containing a couple of white fish, a piece of salmon, two mussels, a pair of clams, and a large crouton covered in not-overpowering aïoli, offering a dreamy, multilayered, Technicolor fish-eating experience. Unusual to find such a clash of highs and lows in the one restaurant, but a venue definitely worth investigating further.

And then it was time for dinner. I’d already had fried eggs on bubble with bacon and sausage, crab on toast and fish stew, so only wanted something light, like a massive steak or something. There’s a new Gaucho on the South Bank in a giant pedestrian development next to City Hall, and seeing as the chain does perfectly decent steaks which I have never yet reviewed, I thought I’d give it a try.

Inside, it looks like a cow has exploded. It’s all white and black with upholstery made from the skin of white and black cattle. It turns out cowhide is pretty damn scratchy, and sitting in a seat covered in it, in a cotton shirt, was punitive, but seemed fitting as a hair-shirt penance for my current gluttony.

As expected, my steak was very decent. I ordered the churrasco (a marinated spiral cut) grilled rare, and it came out very tender indeed, and very tasty. At 300g for the smallest size, though, it is simply too big, and though I managed to cram the last piece down in the end, a girl or fainter-hearted male would be leaving chunks of meat for the bin. In these times of obesity and recession, when human body fat is increasing in inverse proportion to the money in our pockets, I think smaller portion sizes across the restaurant board are crucial.

The calamari ceviche, crab cakes, grilled kingclip and side veg were all harmless, straightforward urban chain food, service was efficient and friendly enough, and the view of Tower Bridge and the river is terrific.

And so then home, and bed, and up in the morning and out again for breakfast, lunch, dinner… gosh, one could almost grow weary of eating out. Almost.

Canteen

55 Baker Street, London W1 (0845 6861122)

Score: 8

Price: £32.34 inc serv

Brompton Bar and Grill

243 Brompton Road, London SW3 (020-7589 8005)

Score: 7

Price: £54 inc serv (no booze)

Gaucho

2 More London Place, London SE1 (020-7407 5222)

Score: 6

Price: £67.85 not inc serv (no booze)

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