As parents, we know our children best. We know what they’re like when they are well, and trust our instincts to tell us when they are ill.

Every child will suffer minor illnesses or accidents at some time, and a few will suffer from chronic or long-term conditions. You’ll be able to manage most minor ailments at home but there will be times when you need to seek professional advice.

The relationship between doctor and parent is an important one. It’s very helpful if you can view it as a partnership, in which you as a parent are actively involved, working as a team in order to make sure your child gets the very best in treatment and care.

There’s plenty you can bring to the partnership in order to make sure you’re getting the best from your child’s doctor in return.

How do I find the right doctor? Do some research before you register your child with a GP. Doctors have different areas of interest and you may prefer a doctor or practice that has an interest in children. Your local surgery should have a practice leaflet with background details of the doctors as well as information on surgery hours, clinics offered and arrangements for out of hours cover, etc. You could also talk to the practice receptionist, a local pharmacist or neighbours to find out who is good with children.

How long will I get? The average appointment with a GP lasts between five and eight minutes. Hospital doctors usually have a bit longer - perhaps around 15 minutes for a follow-up appointment. These times do vary but in essence it doesn’t give you much time to describe your child’s problem, discuss treatment and ask questions.

Doctors prepare to see a child by checking any previous notes and results before calling you in. It‘s just as important for you to prepare, too.

How do I prepare? Before you see your child’s doctor, make a checklist of key facts to get across. When did the problem start? Have the symptoms got worse/better? Have there been any changes in your child’s eating/sleeping patterns or behaviour? Also think about what you want to know from your doctor. Write down what you want to ask.

Consider taking another adult such as a partner, relative or friend with you if you can, especially if it’s an important appointment. Everyone has their own agenda. You’ll be looking for things you want to hear. Or you may place emphasis on one aspect of what your doctor’s saying. If there are two of you there, you’re more likely to get a balanced perspective. You can discuss what you heard afterwards. Also everyone forgets a certain amount of what a doctor says, having another person there can help you remember key facts.

Get there in plenty of time. You may feel there is no point as you will only have to wait, but there is nothing worse than arriving feeling hot, breathless and apologetic

Take things to keep your child amused in case you do need to wait.

What about when I’m in the consulting room? Lots of parents feel anxious or worried, or even frustrated when they first approach a doctor. Even if you’re feeling tense, try to be friendly and ready to listen as well as talk. This will get the relationship off to the best start. Being angry or aggressive, or asking straight off for a particular form of treatment, is likely to make your doctor feel defensive.

When you talk to your doctor, be direct. If you want to know something, ask. Doctors often take their cues from parents as to when and how to give information.

If you seem vague, the doctor may assume you are not ready to hear something.

Ask your doctor to explain any medical jargon. It’s important you leave the surgery with a clear idea of what’s wrong.

During the consultation make brief notes of the key points if you feel this will help you remember them.

At the end of the appointment, it might be helpful to sum up what has been said if your doctor doesn’t do this. It’s a way of checking that you and your child’s doctor have clearly understood what has been said.

How can I find out more about any prescribed medication? If your child’s doctor prescribes medication, make sure you’ve received full instructions on how and when to administer it. Ask about side effects. If you need more information, talk to your pharmacist when you collect the prescription. Many pharmacies can provide a leaflet and full details of the medicine.

What if I’m unhappy with the planned treatment or diagnosis? If you don’t like the treatment your doctor is proposing, there may be alternatives. Don’t be afraid to ask your doctor’s opinion on this. If you have heard of a particular treatment for a condition or ailment, ask. Sometimes, if you’ve heard about a new treatment or medicine through media reports, it could be it’s still in the testing stage and isn’t yet available for use.

If you feel unhappy about the doctor‘s advice or diagnosis, bear in mind you are entitled to ask for a second opinion on the NHS.

What if I’ve forgotten to ask something? Think about whether it can wait until the next appointment. If not, drop your doctor a note or send an email with your question. The doctor will then be able to reply at a convenient time.

In summary You’ll get the best from your child’s doctor if you can work together as a ‘team’ to help your child.