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Rebecca (not her real name) first became anorexic when she was 15. Her condition was diagnosed by a doctor but she was not treated and has had episodes of anorexia ever since. She is now 41, an actress and mother, and regards herself as healthy at 5ft 3in and 7st 3lb. Her lowest weight was 5st 12lb and she has never weighed more than eight stone.
“When I encountered problems as an adult it was really frustrating trying to get treatment,” she says. “I was told that I had depression, but the reason I was depressed was that I wasn’t eating.
At one clinic a doctor told me that no one would want to treat me because I’d had it for so long that I would skew the statistics. The longer you’ve had it, the harder it is to cure and clinics want teenagers they can cure. To be truthful, I don’t want to be in there with a bunch of silly 16-year-olds. I’m a successful woman, I’ve got commitments, family responsibilities.”
In her late thirties Rebecca spent four months with several other older women at a small clinic in California where she says she learnt about the effect of starvation on her organs. “That was the thing that shocked me and turned me around,” she says. “When you’re anorexic you think you’re invincible because you’re able to go on very little food. I’m not sure there are more mature patients now — I think they’ve always been out there saying they didn’t have a problem, and unlike teenagers they don’t have parents who’ll take them to the doctor — but it is being recognised more. In the past I’ve been to my GP about something like a sore throat and I was six stone and losing circulation in my hands because my blood pressure was so low, and I was congratulated for having low blood pressure.
“For me it’s about keeping control when things are going badly. I feel stressed and angry and think, what can I do? I cannot eat, that’s what will calm me down because the message I’ve picked up is if you don’t eat it’s good, if you eat, it’s bad. If I’m feeling down it’s the quickest fix. Miss a meal and I’m good.
At least now I’m aware of the ways in which I sabotage myself.”
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