Whatever you think of David Cameron allowing cameras in to film him at home with his kids, it is hard to argue that this was not a shrewd political move. Long after debate about using children for political ends has been forgotten, the images will remain in voters' heads.

This was presumably the calculation of his image shapers. Being photographed at the breakfast table with his nippers burnished Tony Blair's family-friendly credentials on the way to Downing Street and now young, stretched dads are a target group for politicians as never before.

Dads are more hands-on than in the past and want to be even more so. At least that's what they tell researchers. So no politician is going to miss a chance to say: “Look, I'm just like you.” David Cameron has rather more supporting staff than most of us to help carve out his work-family balance. But he is undoubtedly not one to use the office as an excuse to shirk family responsibilities. He has spent many a night next to the hospital bed of his son Ivan, who has cerebral palsy, before heading off to Shadow Cabinet meetings.

Gordon Brown is shyer about talking of fatherhood in a personal way. But he knows the value of targeting working dads, even if a pledge that “public services engage both the father and the mother” came a long way down a list of family proposals released by Brown's political son, Ed Balls. Funnily enough, Sarah Brown has co-authored a book celebrating fatherhood to be published later this month.

Studies have found that fathers find the conflict between work and childcare to be a major source of stress and that they feel that this stress is likely to increase as society's expectation of how involved they should be with their children grows.

Against that background, a free information service for dads was launched last week. Information cards are being distributed to expectant fathers through NHS maternity units, the Armed Forces and some antenatal groups. The cards carry tips and direct fathers to www.dad.info - an independent website full of information for fathers, whether they are well worried or the worried well.

The good news about dads is that we are, in general, doing a better job than previously. Or, at least, we are spending more time with our children. Quite dramatically more. The time spent by British fathers' caring for infants and young children has risen by 800 per cent since the mid-1970s: from 15 minutes to 2 hours in an average day. “That's an incredible increase,” says Adrienne Burgess, research manager of the think-tank Fatherhood Institute. Those figures do not refer merely to the time fathers spend in the same house with the children, but to the periods of interaction, whether it is at breakfast, driving them to school, or reading a bedtime story.

Another study has found that in the UK dads carry out an average of 25 per cent of the family's childcare-related activities during the week and one third at weekends. Burgess says that the big driver is the upward trend of mothers working. Around 50 per cent of mothers of children under the age of 1 are now in the labour market. Also, full-time working men yearn to spend more time with their families; 82 per cent say so, compared with 70 per cent feeling that way in 1989.

More paternal involvement in the lives of children can only be a good thing. The sadness, anger and confusion of children whose fathers play an insignificant part in their lives is well documented as well as obvious. The bad news about dads is that more and more couples are splitting up, creating a lot of detached dads. Many non-resident dads continue to do a great job of raising kids. But many others become an increasingly distant presence in their children's lives. If you are a dad, let us assume you are a decent one. If you have bothered to read this far it is a safe bet that you are not called Darth Vader with two estranged sprogs called Luke and Leia. But exactly how dedicated to the gritty reality of the fatherhood project are you really? Perhaps there's a touch of the Homer Simpson about you. Sure, you mean well and adore your family, but your dad skills are, shall we say, chaotic and you are, frankly, lazy, a touch slobbish. Or maybe you have a whiff about you of the remote 1950s dad, the direct descendant of the “seen and not heard” Victorian paterfamilias who lurked, stern and baffled by youth, in Just William's background. Do you crave the tranquillity of your study and find yourself addressing your offspring in exasperated, stentorian tones that echo in your head as if uttered by your own father?

Adrienne Burgess says that there has been “a massive generational shift” in terms of people no longer assuming that the father has to be the breadwinner while the mother does childcare. Between 2002 and 2005 the proportion of new fathers who worked flexibly in some way to spend more time with their families rose from 11 per cent to 31 per cent. Seven dads out of ten say that they would like to be more involved in childcare.

Nevertheless, it is not always easy. The gender pay gap means that often the father's salary is bigger than his partner's, precluding him from staying at home as the main carer. Tom Beardshaw, of dad.info, says that men still need to overcome their own, and others', attitudes to domestic dads. “Not many men are brought up to expect to stay at home with the kids,” he says. And while some companies are embracing part-time and flexible working, there remain barriers. “If you work in an organisation where it is frowned upon, generally men won't touch it because it risks your salary and career, and that risks your family stability, which is not the case with most mums.”

Britain lags behind many European countries when it comes to legislation to encourage part-time and flexible working for both parents. One area where the political parties have been making noises is paternity leave. Labour and the Tories are jousting over schemes that would allow fathers to take lengthy paternity leave either alongside, or instead of, the mother. However, it is unclear how many dads would be attracted by paternity pay that matched the £112 statutory sum paid to mothers.

When it comes to more flexible and imaginative approaches to organising our family lives, says Burgess, of the Fatherhood Institute, “policies haven't kept up with the discourse”.

This will almost certainly have to change as women's participation in the labour market grows. By one estimate one UK worker in five will be a mother with a dependent child by 2010. Also, with more women than men entering higher education, and thus likely to move into higher-paid jobs, the opportunity - the necessity - for men to become stay-at-home dads will soar.

Stand by, perhaps, for the father of all social revolutions.

TAKE OUR FATHER QUIZ

1. Your wife is in the labour ward about to give birth. Are you:

a There by her side, mopping her brow, offering encouraging words and taking the abuse while readying yourself to cut the umbilical cord.
b Pacing around outside finishing the first packet of cigarettes of your life and swilling from a can of beer.
c Nursing a large Scotch in your study while waiting for your mother-in-law to phone with an update on the situation at the hospital.
d At an executive awayday on the Death Star.

2. You go to see your boss to discuss paternity leave. He says that he took only a day off for both his children. Do you:

a Tell him firmly that you plan to take the full two weeks as stated in your contract.
b Seek a compromise whereby you will take one week now and the second when it's less busy and end up getting diddled out of the second week because it's never a good time to take it.
c Try to contain your secret delight that you can use the boss's pressure to escape the nursery, tell him that you will follow his example and inform your wife that it's for the best because you'll only get in the way of the 24-hour nursing team.
d Leave paternity issues for your children to unravel much later.

3. You are in sole charge of the baby when you detect a full nappy, a real stinker. Do you:

a Change the nappy immediately and never mention it.
b Change the nappy, but not until you hear your partner's key in the door so that she will catch you at it and give you Brownie points.
c Ring to see when she is going to be back and only change the nappy if she is going to be more than ten minutes.
d Open the windows and go into a different room for as long as it takes for your partner to come to the rescue. Claim that you've got a blocked nose and couldn't smell anything.

4. You and your partner earn the same. She suggests that you go part-time to spend more time with the children while she works full-time. Do you:

a Agree wholeheartedly and start drawing up a weekly timetable for the baby.
b Agree tentatively and then abandon the plan after you lose the children three times in the first week.
c Disagree wholeheartedly. You've never let her have a job.
d Agree enthusiastically and then bring the children over to the dark side when she works late one night.

5. Your daughter is third Christmas tree from the left in the school play. You tell your boss that you will be late in the next day. He is completely baffled by this alien concept and sends you an e-mail two minutes later requesting your presence at a meeting during the play. Do you:

a Go to the play, sit in the front row filming the whole thing and then come into work and never mention the idiot's e-mail.
b Go to the play, but arrive late, missing your child's bit. Turn up at work and when the boss asks you where you've been explain that you assumed he hadn't meant to send you the meeting e-mail given that you'd just spoken about the play. Feel like you have cocked up a bit all round.
c Head in early for the meeting, telling your child that there will be plenty of other plays and that this is not just an important meeting for Daddy, but a vital life lesson for her about the need for work to take precedence over play.
d Suggest to your daughter that she should try harder to get a speaking role next time.

6. The potential title decider is on TV but you've watched a lot of footie recently and your partner wants some time to herself. Do you:

a Drive her to the spa and take the kids to the park.
b Half watch the game while the kids run wild and break a bed jumping on it.
c Watch the game in your den while nanny (on overtime) looks after the kids.
d Drop the kids off with neighbours on the lava planet Mustafar and watch the game in the Mos Eisley cantina or watch the game on Tatooine.

7. Your child is turning into a promising chess player. Do you:

a Let him win a game to boost his confidence and nurture his interest.
b Try to let him win but then spoil it by telling your partner, within his earshot, that that's what you did.
c Continue to thrash him soundly and when he sheds tears of frustration tell him: “Pull yourself together. You'll never learn to win until you learn to lose.”
d As soon as the lad makes a strong attacking move, eye him suspiciously, rasp “Mmm...the force is strong in this one” and before he looks up, whip out your light sabre and deliver a pre-emptive strike to the upper body.

8. The old girl down the road frogmarches your children to the door and complains that they have been scrumping for apples. Do you:

a Apologise profusely and then take the children inside and quietly explain that it is wrong to steal, while wondering to yourself if tree climbing should be included in the policy paper on outdoor play.
b Make a show of apologising but then explain to the kids how to get a better price from flogging the fruit to their classmates.
c Give them six of the best.
d Send them into exile on the prison colony Despayre.

Answers:

Mostly As: I know you, you're that David Cameron bloke off the telly.
Mostly Bs: You mean well and try hard (sometimes) but you're a bit of a Homer in the home. D'oh!
Mostly Cs: The 1950s ended almost half a century ago. Get over it.
Mostly Ds: You're a bit of a Dark Lord of the Sith, aren't you?