— I started guerrilla gardening because I live in a tower block without even a windowsill, and all around me were neglected public flowerbeds. At 2am one morning, I started removing the dead shrubs, litter and weeds, replacing them with lavender, cyclamen and cordyline. I was terrified someone would catch me.

— I realised that my little action was part of something much bigger. It’s such a contradiction that we neglect what little land we have.

— I pick up a lot of rubbish. No matter how smart an area is, people still leave litter. They think it disappears when it is chucked into flowerbeds, but they’re just making matters worse, as nobody removes it from there.

— Gardening at night minimises the number of busybodies. When the police saw my car laden with fertiliser, I became a suspected terrorist. Recently, I was nearly arrested because I didn’t have permission, which you can’t get on the grounds of health and safety – nobody wants to take responsibility if you break a leg. It was the most exciting evening ever.

— There’s evidence that gardens lift spirits. Decrepit environments drive people to crime through despair and a belief they can get away with it because nobody cares.

— I would recommend starting with daffodils, tulips or sunflowers. Keep it local and keep the weeds clear. Seed bombing, or throwing a grenade-like object containing seed and soil, is ideal for inaccessible areas.

Why would I want my own garden? I’d have to pay for it.