There are many reasons to wear contact lenses instead of glasses; they don’t fog up, your field of vision is enhanced, they’re convenient for sport, and – if you wear daily disposables – you don’t have to worry about occasionally losing one. That, anyway, is what I tell myself each time I open my bank statement and, courtesy of my lens-enhanced, razor-sharp vision, clock yet another £22 direct-debited to my optician. But, like countless thousands, I’m deluding myself: the primary reason any man chooses contacts over glasses is vanity.

Just why it is that sunglasses can prove an enhancement, while their clear-lensed counterparts for the optically compromised look like an aesthetic handicap? Well, glasses are a crutch worn to mitigate the physical flaw of poor sight, so, however snazzy and designer the frames, they telegraph a message that the wearer is toting not-all-that DNA.

You see the world through your glasses and the world sees you through them, too – if you’re lucky, as Brains from Thunderbirds, or, if not, Alan Whicker. Even Michael Caine, who, as Alfie and Harry Palmer, made NHS specs look like the acme of style, had issues: “Film stars, to me, were always 6ft 4, had perfect teeth and could do handstands on Malibu Beach – and didn’t need glasses.”

So, praise be to Daysoftlenses.com, whose disposables come in at under £10 a month. They’re British-made, as comfortable as the “brands” and have impeccable provenance. I’ve cancelled the direct debit and put off specciness – for another year or two, anyway.

tokenmale@thetimes.co.uk