They broke my waters and put me on a drip and immediately I was right into a very painful experience. My firstborn appeared at about 11.30, after an epidural and a high-forceps delivery. So much for natural childbirth. As birth experiences go, it was utterly ghastly, including a third-degree tear because they yanked him out.

Lyndsey [Cherie's younger sister] and Tony's sister were now sharing a flat together and when they arrived at the hospital I was still in trauma. There was blood all over the place and Sarah [Tony's sister] said it put her off having babies for ever. Luckily for the future of the planet, the pain is quickly forgotten by the new mother as she is overwhelmed by love for this perfect little person. This was certainly my experience, and from the first blink of those little unfocused eyes, the curl of those tiny fingers, I was hooked, and life would never be the same again. We called this precious creature Euan, after Euan Uglow [the painter] and also a schoolfriend of Tony's who had died far too young.

Tony had been there since the induction began. It would be nice to say that his presence had made all the difference. It would be wrong. He was completely useless. Like practically all stories of new fathers I have heard, he hadn't been expecting it to be quite so gory. My husband has always been good at empathising but when it comes to childbirth, empathy goes only so far. Once Euan was cleaned and wrapped and smelling delicious, however, Tony's pride and delight in his son was such that you'd think he had taken more than a queasy spectator's role. He made up for it later, becoming as adoring and hands-on a dad as anybody could wish for.

The practicalities of the physical ordeal I had just endured took time to percolate through, however, as in the afternoon he told me that I had a visitor. I was about to have my photograph taken, he informed me: The Northern Echo - Sedgefield MP, wife and newborn son being the theme. I was given a rubber ring to sit on so that at least I could force a smile. As the guy went about his business, focusing and clicking, all I could think was, an appearance before the House of Lords is a doddle compared with this. I am never going to do it again. My last thoughts as I went to sleep that night were of my husband: I hate this man.

The truth about Tony and Gordon

Cherie Blair reveals her husband is advising Gordon Brown but says he did not trust him enough to stand down early

• 'The problem with me and Gordon is nothing personal'

• Cherie Blair: motherhood, makeovers and making ends meet – my life in Downing Street

• Cherie Blair: the secrecy and sadness behind a remarkable memoir

Multimedia

• Full coverage: Cherie Blair autobiography

Background

• My complex life in Downing Street

• Secrecy and sadness behind memoir

• Leo: my miracle baby at 45 (and yes, he did have the MMR jab)

• The night I hated Tony

Background

• Miscarriage: ‘I'm afraid the baby's dead, Mrs Blair'

• The Queen and I: relations with the royals

• Cherie Blair's face-off with Campbell over Caplin

• Peter Foster and the ‘scandal' that never was

Related Links

• Miscarriage: ‘I'm afraid the baby's dead, Mrs Blair'

• Tony Blair used Cherie's grief to protect Iraq strategy

• The Queen and I: relations with the royals

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