TONY BLAIR had barely set a foot inside the Chamber yesterday when he heard his first “yo”. It came from the Tory side and the man who claimed to have shouted it was Nicholas “Fatty” Soames.

You could see him, his bejowled face beaming with happiness, boasting to secondary yo-ers around him that he had had the coveted First Yo. Mr Blair made a little grimace.

His statement on the G8 meeting in St Petersburg was dominated, as had been the event, by the fighting in the Middle East.

The mood in the Chamber was serious, if not grim. Mr Blair looked tired and grey. Any mention of his intriguing “Blair and Bush Live and Unplugged” conversation was met by an embarrassed grin.

MPs yo-yoed (I don’t think it was on purpose but they did) between blaming Hezbollah and Israel for making things worse. Mr Blair walked the tightrope with diplomatic ease, though he did attack Iran and Syria for backing Hezbollah.

This was the thing (or as Mr Blair would say privately, “thingy”) that everyone could agree on yesterday: Iran and Syria were bad guys and there was no need to be elliptical about it.

Everyone was disappointed that Mr Blair had reverted to calling Syria’s President Assad by his real name and not, as he did when live, “Honey”.

David Cameron did his best to be statesmanlike but he lacked gravitas. The words are right but there is no feeling behind them.

Yesterday Dave could have taken a lesson from Ming Campbell. It is weird how Ming yo-yos between being hopeless and horrendous.

Yesterday, though, he sparkled but then he was sure of his subject.

“Israel has a moral and legal right to live in peace within defined and secure borders,” he asserted as if he was the moral barometer of the world.

“But that right does not legitimise action which is disproportionate. This amounts to collective punishment in Lebanon and Gaza.”

Mr Blair received more support in his defence of Israel from the Tories than his own MPs. The exception was Sir Peter Tapsell, the biggest panjandrum of them all.

When he was called, I think I saw Mr Blair wince. Perhaps he has a special name for Sir Peter too: it must be something like “Pussycat”.

Sir Peter was in full yowl. He asked whether Mr Blair had explained to Mr Bush that America was to blame for the Middle East crisis. Had the Prime Minister explained to Mr Bush that America is responsible for failing to persuade Israel to return to her legal frontiers in 1967?

“The failure of this has caused an inevitable degree of bitterness which has lead to the creation and sustaining of various guerrilla militias which are increasingly regarded now as part of an Islamic jihad!” Sir Peter half shouted, half spat out the last two words.

For a moment afterwards the Chamber reverberated in silence. Then came a few titters. “Hmmmmm,” said Mr Blair, who looked a bit stunned, as indeed we all were.

But he rallied with his own spirited historical reckoning in which America would be the saviour of the Middle East.

At one point during his defence, a Tory shouted: “Ask Condi!” There is no doubt that Tony Blair’s Live and Unplugged conversation will not be forgotten soon.

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