Murad Ahmed
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She was dropped as the “Voice of the Tube” after she made fun of her own announcements on the internet and was said to have criticised London Underground. But Emma Clarke, who can still be heard telling millions of commuters to “mind the gap”, is now the voice of sat-nav.
Ms Clarke will be heard voicing directions on a new satellite navigation system for mobile phones.
Last month, Tube bosses said that they would not provide the voiceover artist with any more work. A Transport for London (TfL) spokesman said: “London Underground is sorry to have to announce that further contracts for Ms Clarke are experiencing severe delays.”
The press annoucement was how Ms Clarke heard that her eight-year relationship had reached its end.
But it seems that she will be having the last laugh. Offers for her services have poured in. She said: “I took my girl to school on the Monday morning not expecting to be on the 10 o’clock news that night. Professionally, it has been fantastic as it’s opened many doors for me.”
Her new employer is the maker of CoPilot, the satellite navigation software, but she has also had offers of work with American comedians and rap stars and the opportunity from a publisher to write a novel. Ms Clarke said: “Even a bloke in the Caribbean called me asking if I would do his answer phone message for him.”
Despite the furore surrounding her Tube spoof announcements, Ms Clarke has created new sat-nav related spoofs and has put the recordings on her website - this time with the agreement of her new employers. In one she says: “I said left, not right, you numptie.” In another: “Just look at this loonie, he won’t get there any quicker.”
In one of her Tube announcements she said: “Here we are, crammed again into a sweaty Tube carriage. . . if you are female, smile at the bloke next to you and make his day. He’s probably not had sex for months.”
Michael Kornhauser, managing director of ALK Technologies, which developed the sat-nav software, said: “When we heard about Emma’s availability we immediately got in touch. Our research indicates that the most important criterion for a sat-nav voice is clarity of pronunciation, and as every London commuter will know ‘the voice of the Tube’ is exactly that.”
TfL insisted that the joke was not lost on it, saying it was the criticism of the Tube system, which Ms Clarke had apparently called “dreadful”, rather than the spoof announcements, that sealed her fate. Ms Clarke insisted that she was misquoted and did not criticise the network.
TfL has said that Ms Clarke’s announcements are “fit for purpose” and will continue be heard on the network for the foreseeable future.
Ms Clarke received hundreds of messages of support. On the social networking website, Facebook, hundreds more had joined a group dedicated to reinstating her as the voice of the Tube.
Only joking
Sat-nav spoofs
— I bet Santa drives a Rover. He looks like one of those people that would
— Oi, Schumacher, where’s the fire?
— Pick a lane, any lane. Are you feeling lucky?
— Stop picking your nose, I can see you, you know
— The pedal on the right makes you go faster
The original Tube spoofs
— Would the passenger . . . pretending to read a paper but who is actually staring at that woman’s chest please stop. You’re not fooling anyone, you filthy pervert
— Passengers are asked not to drop litter on the train. Please use the tramps provided
— Passengers are reminded that a smile is a friendship signal, not a sign of weakness
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