Valentine Low
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Sir Clement Freud, who has died nine days short of his 85th birthday, was a man of many achievements. They included becoming a chef, nightclub proprietor, television personality, radio panellist, Liberal MP, amateur jockey and journalist — although for many years he had to endure being known as the doleful character in the dog food commercials. At least it made a change from being known as the grandson of Sigmund Freud.
If his performances promoting Minced Morsels with Henry the bloodhound were an onerous legacy — children who saw him in public would shout out, “Where’s your dog?”, much to his annoyance — they were also lucrative. His terms for the advertisements were that he would write his own script, that he would not mention the product by name and that he would be paid the same as the Prime Minister’s annual salary. Astonishingly, the advertising agency agreed.
In later years he was best known for his appearances on the Radio 4 panel show Just a Minute, where he was the master of the late interruption, and always sounded disappointed if he did not win. “He was very competitive,” said Nicholas Parsons, the programme’s host.
His wit was evident from an early age, as was its sometimes calamitous effect. At a hunt ball in the early Fifties a girl, on discovering that his grandfather was the founder of psychoanalysis, said: “I say, congratulations! May I dance with you?” He pointed out that Sigmund Freud was not keen on dancing, though he was strong on sex, at which point the girl went bright red and beat a retreat.
His love of gambling was used to great effect when he contested the Cambridgeshire seat of the Isle of Ely for the Liberal Party. The bookmakers put him at 33-1, at which point he placed a sizeable bet on himself. “The word went round that the hot money was going on Mr Freud,” said Parsons, who helped him to campaign. “They all began to take him more seriously.”
His lugubrious, grumpy demeanour concealed a mischievous streak. A big international magazine once offered him a generous sum to write about his grandfather. He duly supplied 1,500 words — on his maternal grandfather.
That sense of mischief followed him into the Commons, where in his last term the painful courtship between the Liberals and the Social Democrats resulted in an alliance. A dinner was mooted in celebration and Freud was designated to find a restaurant.
“There was David Owen, and Roy Jenkins, who was no stranger to the sybaritic side of life,” recalled Lord Ashdown of Norton-sub-Hamdon. “Clay [as Freud was known to his friends] chose a vegetarian restaurant in a basement off the Tottenham Court Road. As we went down, the first thing which greeted was a sign which said that the lesbian callisthenics class was cancelled. The look of complete and utter distress on Roy Jenkins’s face, and the look of complete dislike on David Owen’s, was perfect. I know that Clay did it as a joke, and it is something I shall never forget.”
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