Richard Wilson
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One is “dreamy picturesque and steeped in nostalgia”, another is “rousing, in the country-dance tradition”. The lyrics are all tartan-hued, fond reminiscences that might be accompanied by shortbread, such as “far to the north, lies the land of the free, where they live by the farming, and fishing the sea”.
Even Edward Cairney, 55, who has written the 13 songs in his quest to promote a new national anthem for Scotland, admits he doesn't know how the public will react to his endeavours. “In six months' time, they may think we need to do something about this,” he says hopefully.
There is something typically Scottish about Cairney and his efforts to find an alternative to Flower of Scotland and Scotland the Brave, the two songs slurred at Scottish sporting events.
A composer and writer from Arbroath, Cairney launched a website last week - Scottishanthem.co.uk - for people to vote for their favourite among his 13 compositions, or suggest another song. “It's early days,” he sighs. Yet he is following a well-worn path: that of the single-minded Scottish enthusiast. It seems apt that he is a devotee of William McGonagall, the much-derided Dundonian poet.
“He's an inspiration to me,” Cairney says. “If you can imagine going into the boxing ring with Mike Tyson and he knocks you down every 10 seconds, but you keep on getting back up and you last the 12 rounds, that's McGonagall. He had this unbelievable self-belief. I like his poetry because it's unpretentious.”
Cairney was the vice-chairman of the McGonagall Society six years ago, during the centenary of the poet's death, arranging a festival celebrating his work and writing a musical that he hopes to stage at the Edinburgh Fringe. He does not consider McGonagall's work as a direct influence, but admits the writer of such memorable compositions as The Tay Bridge Disaster will have had a bearing on his own creations.
“I have worked with McGonagall's rhyming structures, when I wrote the songs for the musical, and everything rubs off on you,” he says. “Writing is an unconscious thing, you never know when you're rhyming or not, you just do it by feel, by instinct. You mostly wake up in the morning with the thing written in your head.”
In his search for a Scottish equivalent to The Star-Spangled Banner, Cairney is not alone. Pete Wishart, the former member of the band Runrig, who is now the SNP MP for Perth and North Perthshire, believes an X Factor-style programme should be established to choose a new anthem for Scotland. He admires Cairney's ambition, even though he would like to see some contemporary songs involved.
“He's had a reasonable stab at it, they're quite musical,” says Wishart of the composer's anthems. “They still hark back to old melodies. I'd like to hear something different, we're a new nation, and we don't have to always look back. It doesn't have to be an anthem based on history - it could be talking about where we want to go.”
Other musicians are more dismissive of Cairney. Alan Beck of Caldon, the Scottish tenors group who have frequently sung Flower of Scotland at Hampden, said: “We've got some great songs already, some tremendous traditional tunes. Musically, his songs aren't really up to it.”
Of his own work, Cairney began his search after writing new lyrics to the tune he often carries around in his head, Scots Wha Hae. Then an American woman, who had heard his version, sent an e-mail asking why there were not more anthems to choose from, which prompted a creative burst of energy that delivered another 12 songs.
Now, he favours Scotland Bold and Free - “a very short anthem and to the point” - and Land of the Noble Nation, written to the tune of Highland Cathedral. He has also sent press releases to America in the hope of stimulating a debate among the ex-pat community.
“What's up to date today is out of date tomorrow,” says Cairney. “An anthem always has to be a compromise. You can never push the boat out too far with it. The way I've done it is to look backwards but also forwards at the same time.
“I really feel passionately that if Scotland wants to put itself forward as a proper country, it has to have one anthem that is universally accepted.”
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Calm yourself, Greg Dunn. What's so offensive about the National Anthem (the union was created by a Scottish monarch, incidentally), and are you joking when you say it is played to deathly silence? The English love our National Anthem, and blast it out. Okay, it's not as good as the French or USA anthems, and the Welsh have a good one, but ours is pretty good for yelling. I don't know why it gets such a bad press. Flower of Scotland is quite good, provided they use the original, modal version of the tune. Obviously it's offensive to the English, though.
Will Duffay, London,
At least either Scottish National Anthem is a thousand times preferable to the dull dirge, offensive to all Scots, that is played to a deathly silence when England play. Oh yes I forgot that the English have no national anthem at all maybe that is why they have to keep using the UK version? How about one for them first?
Greg Dunn, Edinburgh , Scotland
I can't believe what I've just read....I live in France, and during the 6 Nations Rugby Tournament, "The Flower of Scotland" is always introduced in hallowed tones by the commentators as the most beautiful of all the anthems - I wholeheartedly agree. Has the country gone mad???? Don't tell me you seriously want to change it????
Joëlle, Paris, France
How about 'Donald, where's ya troosers' by Andy Stewart?
mnairb, Hove, U.K.
No, no, no , no, no. It has to be 500 miles by the Proclaimers and I'm not joking either. Without any proper words the chorus is perfect. It means even the most drunken Scot can join in.
Da-de-da-da.....
Philip Martin, Balquhidder, Perthshire
It's got to be "Hoots Mon" by Lord Rockingham's XI.
(I'm not even joking. It's exuberant and mischievous like the Scots, subverts the pomposity of most anthems, and imagine the terror of opposing teams at Hampden as 55,000 suddenly explode into voice bellowing "THERE'S A MOOSE! LOOSE! ABOOT THIS HOOSE!")
Rev. Stuart Campbell, Bath,
There is only one contender for a Scottish anthem, Hamish Henderson's Freedom Come A' Ye.
Tam Campbell, Glasgow,