He is one of Britain’s most celebrated artists whose customers include Madonna, David Bowie and Mick Jagger but Peter Howson is haunted by a “murderous rage” that has brought him close to the point of killing several people.

The former official war artist in Bosnia, who suffers from Asperger Syndrome, said he has become so depressed that he has contemplated murder followed by suicide. He claims he has become so enraged that he has been on the point of strangling people before pulling back from the urge.

“I’ve got a rage in me that I could murder someone,” he said. “I can feel it in myself. I’ve almost done it a few times.”

The 50-year-old, who has battled drink and drug addictions, believes his ferocious temper is a symptom of Asperger syndrome, a form of autism. “Because of my Asperger syndrome I could have ended up murdering someone. I’m capable of it, I know that. When I was drinking I went into very dark places. If you think life is meaningless you think, well, why not go down with a bang.”

Howson said he came close to killing someone in Albania in 1999 when he was carrying out humanitarian work during the Kosovo conflict.

A car he was travelling in was surrounded by police officers who held him at gunpoint. Howson said he physically attacked and threatened to kill a local man, whom he suspected of giving false information to the police which led to the car being stopped.

On another occasion he became involved in a fight with a man whom he had seen violently attacking a woman.

Several of his best-known works depict violent characters and he said he believed violent men may be drawn to them.

Although Howson insists he is still capable of murder, he has learned to channel his anger after receiving psychiatric counselling. He was treated at Castle Craig clinic in Peebles in 2000 for alcohol and cocaine addiction. He also converted to Christianity.

“I used to be very badly bullied at school and when I was a bouncer in a nightclub for a quite a few years I changed in a false sense then, and became a bully myself,” he said.

“I liked fighting and got into gang fights and I got my nose broken three times. I remember punching someone so hard once that almost all of their teeth fell out.

“I can hold myself back now, but the anger will always be there.”

Carol Povey, head of adult services at the National Autistic Society, applauded Howson for speaking out about the effects of his condition.

“The nature of Asperger syndrome is such that people find it really hard to make sense of the world,” she said.

“They can become very fearful, frustrated and confused and that can manifest itself in anger, although it is not common. To express it in terms of a murderous rage the way Peter Howson has is very unusual but every individual is different. The important thing is raising awareness of the condition.”

Last week it emerged that five Howson pictures owned by a convicted criminal are to be auctioned off as part of a £29,100 proceeds of crime order. It was the second time this year that a Scottish court had seized works by the artist. Howson said he had never knowingly sold his art to criminals.

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