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The father of the Malawian boy adopted by Madonna has accused the pop star of severing contact between him and his son and says he regrets ever putting the child up for adoption.
Yohane Banda, 33, said the singer had reneged on a promise to allow him to maintain regular contact with his son David, whom he last saw in 2006.
Banda, a peasant farmer, said he had not received any correspondence since the three-year-old was taken to London by Madonna and her husband, the film director Guy Ritchie.
Madonna, 49, began adoption proceedings after meeting the boy at an orphanage in Malawi. At the time it was claimed that the singer had used her celebrity status to fast-track the adoption, an allegation she denies.
The adoption is due to be approved formally by a court in Lilongwe, the Malawian capital, next month. Because the terms of the agreement are secret under Malawian law, it is not clear whether Banda’s intervention will jeopardise the adoption.
Banda, who first expressed his frustration at not being kept informed about his son’s progress a year ago, said the star had failed to address his concerns and he now regretted giving the boy up.
“I feel robbed. I should be able to see my son and say hello,” Banda said. “I don’t know how he is growing, what person he is turning into. This pains me because it looks like he is not my son any more.”
Banda, from Lipunga, a village 100 miles from Lilongwe, claims Madonna promised to keep him updated about his son’s well-being and his progress adapting to life with the celebrity couple and their two children.
“I was promised by Madonna that I would be able to see my son,” he said. “The government people that were coming to see me also assured me that they would facilitate my meetings with my son. I miss him so much because he is my only son, the only gift of life from God – all others have died.
“I told her [Madonna] that although I was giving her my son she should look after him well . . . I told her that she should raise him, educate him and make sure that he does not forget me and Malawi.
“Now I fear that my child will never know his roots and will not know me. He is the only surviving child I have and I regret the whole thing now. It’s so painful sometimes to realise that I have been forgotten.”
Banda claims the star snubbed him during a visit to the country in April last year. Madonna funds six orphanages through her Raising Malawi charity and is setting up one for 4,000 children in a village outside the capital.
“The last time Madonna came to Malawi, I didn’t know she was here and that she visited the orphanage. [If I had known] I would have been given a chance to see my son,” he said.
Banda said the only recent pictures he had seen of David were shown to him by journalists and the orphanage where his son lived before he was adopted. He added that he had not been allowed to keep any of the photographs. Banda said he hoped he would be given the opportunity to see his son again when Madonna, who has been granted temporary custody of the boy, returns to Malawi to conclude the adoption.
“I am praying that I have a chance to see him. All I want is for them to maintain contact as promised, to teach him I am his real father,” he said.
In a documentary premiered in America last week, the singer said that when she first saw David, nobody knew the whereabouts of his father. When she returned to see him three months later, Madonna said he “had pneumonia, malaria and God knows what else”.
The Malawian government has already recommended that the adoption go ahead. A report by an official who visited the singer’s London home last year concluded that the adoption was “in the best interests” of the boy.
Justin Dzonzi, a lawyer and prominent critic of the adoption, said both Madonna and the Malawian government had a moral duty to maintain contact between Banda and his son.
His group, the Human Rights Consultative Committee, is calling for a change in the law to ban adoptions by foreigners.
“If the government and Madonna promised, as is being claimed, to keep the biological father updated on his child, then they have to honour that for the sake of the poor man,” he said.
“By allowing the adoption of his child he clearly surrenders his parental rights to Madonna and her husband but he still deserves some news on his boy.”
Yohane Banda is no relation to Mabvuto Banda, the journalist who wrote this article
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I agree that the father is now seeing the possibility of £££ for himself. He has said in the past he was glad and that Madonna saved his son. Madonna is always criticised for everything, here she did something right that her emotions drew her too. Adoption is adoption.
Lisa, Cardiff, UK
David's father was coerced into giving up his son by government officials. Most "orphanages" worldwide are not for adoption but feeding/care centers. Try informing yourselves of the truth before insulting a poor, illiterate widower who was trying to help his baby survive in desperate circumstances.
Cat McKenzie, New York, USA
The important thing is that the CHILD will have the opportunity to know his roots and considering his new family and the publicity. He will have access to all that information when he grows up. My heart goes out to all adoptees who can't find their first families and know their roots.
Max, Austin, Tx, USA
I don't know if Madonna made any "promises" or not. However, I don't think David's father had ever been present or concerned about his son's welfare in the past. From reports I've read, I hear that Madonna had difficulty in even locating any of David's family members including the father.
Liza, San Francisco, United States of America
Asking for updates is not asking for much. The father would ride his bike 7 miles once a week to see his son. The child was at the facility because was sick and the little village had no hospital. Besides, what do any of you people know about Malawi adoption laws? The whole thing is disgusting.
Chang, London,
Very interesting indeeed. Considering that barely a year into the adoption of the child, the father was celebrating the beginning of a new marriage... Interesting indeed. He quoted previously as asking opponents to the adoption to stop bickering as the adoption was the best for the child...
Renee, Lilongwe, Malawi
I am not intimately familiar with living conditions of Malawi farms, but it is entirely likely that these families live in near starvation conditions and that may be why the other children died. It may be why someone would dearly love their child, be an excellent parent, and yet send them to America
Jon Klement, St. Charles, MO, USA
Madonna, as one of the 10 richest women in the world, could easily have provided for David Banda and his entire village without even noticing the impact on her bank balance... let us hope the child gets on with his nannies. while "mum" is in the gym, nannies are bringing him up.
Rosy Armitage, Hove, United Kingdom
Hmmm...all other children have died. Don't think he was taking very good care of them. Be thankful that he is in a home where he will receive love and nutrition and education. Allowing him to be adopted and therefore live was showing your love. Now let it be.
Andrea, St. Louis, MO, USA
Living in a foster home ........well he must of really loved his son.
Surprise surprise along come madonna with all her millions and the father suddenly takes a paternal interest.
Not poor father, poor son for being dumped in a foster home but now a lucky son that will want for nothing.
andy murray, reading, uk
The Banda guy gave up his son for adoption - he doesn't get to see him regularly; that's forster care. And the only reason he is being all "fatherly" now is that it is economically viable. Each time he speaks to a journalist even the local ones,I am so sure he gets paid and he is milking it.
Dupe, London,
It is clear that the father to the 'adopted' son was ignorant of the implications of the trap he was putting himself in. When knowledgeable people like the Human Rights Consultative Committee tried to intervene on behalf of the father, many dismissed this as a publicity stance. Sorry to the poor man
Bennett Kankuzi, Blantyre, Malawi
When biological parents give a child up for adoption, they forfeit all rights with regard to that child. Madonna is doing nothing wrong.
tim abbott, London, UK
As an adopted child myself I agree with Madonnas stance. He needs to know one set of parents only otherwise it gets very very confusing !!!!!
Ian Payne, WALSALL,
Yet again the "open-adoption" trick is fallen for. A parent who wants to ensure that his child will know his roots is denied this simple request. Seems the least she could do after being given such a gift. She has twice asked for delayed hearings - in order to promote her latest album. Pitiful.
Kate, Burlington, USA
Isn't the UK signatory to various treaties on the kidnapping of children from their parents?
Can't charges be laid in the UK?
Keith S, Winnipeg, Canada
A boy loses his father and a father loses his son - so that Madonna can have a fashion accessory and be 'like Angelina Jolie' with all the attention it will give her. If Madonna was genuine she could have helped this boy's entire community with a fraction of her wealth without separating anyone.
Paul Williams, London, England
Cmon! Sounds to me like the father wants in on the action himself! Adoption is Adoption, you don't give your kid away and expect "rights" ....sorry, I aint buying.
Madonna adopted a kid - not a kid and his dad.
Stone, Brooksville, USA
the boy's father put him up for adoption for the purpose of an opportunity for a healthy life -- he should thank his lucky stars for the miracle and be at peace. When his son is grown, he can visit his father and show him the man he has become --until then, his father should quiet down.
Mark, Hartford,
Someone ought to have told this Banda dude the meaning of adoption!!
Tayani Banda, LL, MW
Why should he have contact? he gave the child up. if a country has not the means to care for its orphaned children why would you want to stop foreign adoptions by those who can care for them? Or is that the idea let them all die and then cry for help. Here is help take it use it but dont ban it.
Kimberley Arndt-riviera, tucson, usa
I think if you look at the posh life this child is being given, it is hard to show that he would be better off with his father. The child was sick and was living in an orphanage, showing the father could not care for the child. I think the father still has the right to know how his child is doing.
Lisa, Mendo, Mendo