THE wife of John Edwards, the Democratic presidential candidate, has revealed that she is writing a “dying letter” to her children as she copes with incurable cancer and life on the campaign trail.

Elizabeth Edwards has been writing the letter on her computer since she saw Terms of Endearment, the Oscar-winning 1983 film in which a dying mother leaves advice for her children. She describes her own version as a guide to life: “It’s got all that butting my nose into their lives long after I’m gone stuff.”

Since learning in March that her breast cancer, first diagnosed in 2004, had spread to her bones, she has not stopped campaigning.

Emma Claire, 9, and Jack, 7, are being given school lessons at home and frequently accompany their mother on the road. She told The Wall Street Journal that her job was to “stay alive until the medical research catches up”. So-called stage 4 breast cancer patients have a 20% chance of staying alive for five years.

When Jack asked her recently who would be his children’s grandma, she choked up. Emma Claire tries to do as much as possible with her when they are together. “No, I want mom to do this with me,” she insists. For Edwards, “It’s sweet, but bittersweet. Emma Claire and I know one day I won’t be there”.

To Cate, her 25-year-old daughter, the letter offers everything from fashion tips to advice about balancing work and family, and on religion. “We raised you in the Methodist church to give you a foundation, but ultimately you need to reexamine what choice of church is right for you,” she writes.

In between campaign stops, Edwards, 58, is sorting out her own and her children’s belongings and boxing them for after her death. She once said: “I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you there were times when I feel overwhelmed.”

She firmly believes that campaigning for her husband is a calling worthy of “my precious time”. At times she has been criticised for her decision. “I worry if this is right, but I don’t have any good choices,” she said.

The couple found a new life in politics after their 16-year-old son, Wade, died in a car crash. On the campaign trail, supporters often pray for her but she said: “I had to come to grips with a God who allows Wade to die, who doesn’t intervene.”

She has emerged as a feisty and forthright campaigner, who is widely considered to be her husband’s greatest asset. Last week she caused controversy by claiming that he would do more for women as president than Hillary Clinton because she is trying to “behave like a man” to be commander-in-chief.

The couple will celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary next week. In accordance with tradition, they will dine on ham-burgers at Wendy’s fast food restaurant and will be renewing their vows. “John just can’t face that Elizabeth won’t be around,” said Hargrave McElroy, a family friend. “Elizabeth is getting her ducks in a row . . . and isn’t tiptoeing around death.”

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