To the exhaustive CV of Fabio Capello, the England manager, can be added
another main skill: that of master salesman. For if David Beckham truly was
taken on by AC Milan after recommendations from Capello, this is a man who
will never be short of career opportunities in the high street if it does
not work out for him at the World Cup finals in 2010. “Do you want one off
the peg, sir, or do you want one made up? Were you out with a lady last
night? Ooh, suit you, sir. The ladies like a man in a suit, don’t they sir?
Ooh, suit you, sir. Ooh.”
Capello may believe Beckham is suited to Serie A, but watching Milan labouring
to overcome ten-man Napoli at the San Siro on Sunday night, they looked like
a team who need an ageing wide player about as much as a set of Dolce &
Gabbana blouson and combats need a matching tie and handkerchief.
You know when you see a guy walking down the street and his trousers are two
inches off the top of his shoes, or his jacket is three sizes too big, like
a shoddily pitched tent? Some people wonder about the mentality of the
person who bought that suit. I don’t: I admire the salesman. After all, he
is the brains of the operation, the half of the team that commands respect.
He spotted the guy wearing this ill-fitting garment, standing doubtfully in
front of the mirror on the brink of the right decision, he quickly computed
that this suit is perhaps the only one in stock and the sale hung on his art
of persuasion, and he leapt in and seized the day. “Oh yes, sir, this item
was designed to show a lot of ankle. Very much the style this year.
Obviously, because you are standing still it accentuates it more, but now,
see, when you walk, it barely notices. No, this is absolutely your size. The
jacket? Smaller? I don’t think so. Maybe you are not used to the material.
Very heavy, for winter. It just feels big. Very cold in northern Italy this
time of year, sir. Very cold.”
One imagines Capello pulling a similar number on Carlo Ancelotti, the Milan
coach, once Beckham had informed him that his Galaxy were far, far away from
extending their competitive season beyond October 26 against Dallas. Capello
instantly saw a long, football-less winter stretching out for his favourite
accessory and took action. “Carlo, I’m telling you, this one is right up
your street. A lot of people couldn’t get away with it, Carlo, but not you.
I see you together. I see it happening, I really mean that. What does he do?
What doesn’t he do! He gives it simple, he keeps it tight, he starts wide,
he comes inside, I’m telling you he goes with everything. Pace? Oh pace,
schmace, pace is very last year, Carlo, you know that, very last year.
Nobody’s going with it now. It’s like purple. Theo? Theo who? Oh, him, yes,
but you know me, darling, I’m a creature of habit. I’m not daring like you.
I’m not bold.”
And off Ancelotti walked, with his trouser legs over his ankle bone, his
jacket cuffs dancing around his fingertips and Beckham on a three-month loan
to a team who are screaming out for a quick wide player who can get past his
man.
Milan are top of Serie A, but it is a strange supremacy. It needed Udinese to
slip up at home to Genoa on Sunday for Milan’s match with Napoli to become
one in which the victor would go top. Milan won, but fortuitously, and an
own goal from Germán Denis, the Napoli striker, who headed a corner past
Gennaro Iezzo, his goalkeeper, was all that put space between the teams
three minutes from time. Napoli are strong this season (playing three at the
back, a system that we all know nobody uses any more) under Edoardo Reja,
the journeyman coach who is on his 21st job in 29 years.
Even so, Milan made frightfully hard work of the win and got all the breaks.
In the 44th minute, Napoli had Christian Maggio, the wide right midfield
player, sent off for two bookable offences that probably added up to one,
they lost Marek Hamsik, the influential midfield player, to injury at
half-time and Fabiano Santacroce, their best central defender, to a freak
fall soon after. Milan were given a lucky late penalty for handball, which
was saved, before the pressure and the reduced nature of the Napoli team
showed and Denis headed into his own net. The best player on the field, by a
mile, was Napoli’s second striker, Ezequiel Lavezzi, a hard-running, skilful
23-year-old from Argentina who has unsurprisingly caught the eye of Chelsea,
and the Italian newspapers gave the losers better reviews.
Where does Beckham fit into all this? He doesn’t. What Milan missed on Sunday
was a wide player who would get beyond the line of defence, who would hug
the flank and stretch the play against ten men. What Ancelotti is getting
when Beckham reports for Milan’s training camp in Dubai on December 29 is
more of the same. He is overrun with players that start wide and come
inside, such as Kaká and Ronaldinho, he has a queue of midfield players who
like to occupy the central ground, three in the team and with several
others, such as Andrea Pirlo or Mathieu Flamini, injured or on the bench.
There is a glaring weakness in the team, though, for what Milan singularly
failed to do, given every advantage, was get in behind Napoli and turn the
defending players back towards their goal. When they finally did it, albeit
from an inswinging corner, they scored.
Beckham’s move works on a variety of levels. One can see what he gets out of
it, certainly what Capello gets out of it, and what Milan take from it as a
business. Even the Los Angeles Galaxy must reap some dividend if Beckham’s
appearances in Serie A maintain his worldwide profile and, therefore, in a
small way, that of Major League Soccer. But the benefit for the starting XI
at Milan? It is hard to say. The serenity Beckham brings to Capello’s
England team in the closing stages of a match is not a rare commodity in the
Italian game. Indeed, of the many plaintive cries from Italian coaches
shielding a slender lead late in the second half, the most infrequently
heard is likely to be: “Oh, if only we had a player who knew how to keep the
ball so we could just wind the clock down! What is it with our obsessive
methodology, our focus on team ethics and regimented tactical plans that we
cannot produce such men?”
Nobody, least of all Beckham, is thrilled to see the record books recast via a
series of cameo roles for England, but while his latest career course at
international level is controversial, Capello’s logic is inescapable.
England’s failure to qualify for this year’s European Championship finals is
directly attributable to the failure to hold on to an advantageous position
in three matches: Croatia away (drawing 0-0 after one hour, a good result
had it stayed that way), Russia away (winning 1-0 with 21 minutes remaining)
and Croatia at home (drawing 2-2 with 13 minutes remaining and, with that
scoreline, through to the finals). Although Beckham did lose possession for
the winning Croatia goal in the fateful 3-2 defeat, he is widely considered
a safe player with the technique to see a game out and it is often in these
circumstances that Capello has called on him. Against poor opposition, such
as Kazakhstan or Andorra, his crosses always make a difference and he
remains a threat from set-plays. For England, he brings a certain quality to
the party, but even if he transports that to Milan, it is scarcely what they
need.
Would Beckham’s prowess with a dead ball have been a threat against Napoli?
Yes, but it was not as if Milan did not have that base covered, considering
the way in which the game was won. Would Beckham’s long passes from deep
have been an advantage? Hardly, considering that Napoli’s defence, which
includes Fabio Cannavaro’s younger brother, Paolo, mopped up everything that
was launched in the direction of Marco Borriello, another one of those
typically Italian strikers who never look like scoring but get a standing
ovation when replaced by a replica with 20 minutes to go. So what is
Beckham’s purpose in a team who are already constrained by their narrowness?
To keep it tight? Every player in Italy can do that.
What Ancelotti needed against Napoli was Theo Walcott, the player who has
helped to transform Capello’s England by giving them the pace and movement
that proved vital in releasing Wayne Rooney. Maybe such a player is arriving
in midwinter, too. If so, what is the point of Beckham, other than to do a
favour for an old ally and briefly plunder the Asian market?
While not decrying Beckham’s ability, even he acknowledges it is Walcott’s
time now. In truth, it will always be Walcott’s time. If not him, then
somebody like him. Somebody younger, faster, with the spark to ignite the
victory before the wise heads come on to shore up the game. That is
Beckham’s worth for England, but there is no vacancy for the role at Milan.
Ancelotti has match-winners such as Kaká, Ronaldinho and Pato, but their
playing styles are similar. He needed something different to break down
Napoli on Sunday. Milan did not possess it; and on December 29, they still
won’t. Beckham may be heading for the fashion capital of Europe but, on this
evidence, he is about as necessary and vital there as a nice set of leather
elbow patches. Suit you, sir? Maybe, but he doesn’t suit them.
