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The day before the opening Test of the 1994-95 Ashes series, Mark Taylor, the Australia captain, was asked a simple question: “How many Englishmen would get into the Australian team?” His answer was equally straightforward: “None,” he said, although he conceded that Darren Gough's ebullience and general good humour would make him a decent twelfth man.
Before the 2005 series, Ricky Ponting, in a rare show of Australian humility, admitted that Andrew Flintoff might just sneak into the Australia XI, and Flintoff and Kevin Pietersen would have been certainties in any composite team before the 2006-07 whitewash. For the most part, though, the past two decades have been about individual mismatches. Which spinner would you rather have faced in 2002-03: Shane Warne or Richard Dawson?
Matching up the relative merits of the individuals in each team is just about the roughest calculation of where the balance of power lies. But why spend hours crafting a decent column when you can get away with this?
It takes no account of what might be called a team's “corporate” spirit, of captaincy or of luck. Will Pietersen trip up (over his ego, perhaps) as Glenn McGrath did before the Edgbaston Test in 2005, and so deprive England of their best player? Nevertheless, if a team are outgunned, man to man, in every department, they have little chance of success.
I've looked at the teams that each may like to send out on to the park (for example, I've assumed that Shane Watson will be fit). How do the Ashes class of '09 stack up?
Andrew Strauss v Phillip Hughes
The consensus is that self-interested counties have stymied the national team by allowing Hughes a stint in England before the Ashes. I don't go along with that. Strauss has had time to have a good look at the left-hander's unorthodox technique, while Hughes's brilliance in the early part of the season has raised expectations to an almost unmatchable level. But he will find England's attack a far tougher proposition than second division bowlers.
It may be that he is another genius from the Outback, the next in a long lineage that has included Don Bradman, Stan McCabe, Doug Walters and Michael Slater, but we cannot yet be sure. He may carry all before him or fall flat on his face. Strauss, meanwhile, is proven, dependable and tough, and in the past 12 months has been in the form of his life. On whom would you put your hard-earned? Verdict: Strauss
Alastair Cook v Simon Katich
Cook, fine young player that he is, has not yet taken his game to the next level. He is much tougher than his choirboy looks suggest, but is always battling his technique, which has more holes than a Swiss cheese. Australia will look to starve him of bread and butter leg-side runs and the short ball, and make him drive through the off side - a tactic that rendered him shot-less at times during the most recent Ashes series.
Katich was vulnerable to the swinging ball during the 2005 series and has a modest record against England. Since 2005, though, he has risen to the challenge by carrying all before him in Australian domestic cricket and forcing the selectors' hand when many thought his time had gone. If England get sucked into bowling too straight as he shuffles across his stumps, he could have a profitable time. Verdict: Katich
Ricky Ponting v Ravi Bopara
The champion and the challenger. These players are at opposite ends of the career spectrum, Ponting having achieved everything in the game, Bopara setting out to do just that. Bopara looked a potential champion against West Indies, but how much of a test was that? Questions remain: he was dropped on numerous occasions and Warne has clearly seen something in his temperament that would have got the great spinner twitching his fingers and loosening his vocal cords.
Ponting, meanwhile, looks as hungry as ever, even if he is getting to the stage in life where other things - principally family - may start to take the edge off his game. Verdict: Ponting
Kevin Pietersen v Michael Clarke
I expect Pietersen to rise to the occasion and cement his position as one of the great batsmen of the moment. Like all captains, Ponting hates the feeling of not being in control of events in the field and Pietersen is the player who can change the course of a game in a session. Clarke, though, has questions to answer: he has never been that successful in England, either for Hampshire as an overseas player or in the 2005 series, and technically he has looked suspect against the moving ball. Verdict: Pietersen
Paul Collingwood v Michael Hussey
Collingwood always seems as though he has something to prove and his great strength over the years has been the way he has responded to that pressure. But he has had an anonymous season and his performances in the World Twenty20 did little for his reputation or confidence. Hussey, after a magnificent start to his career, had been finding things tougher, but demonstrated his class with an unbeaten century against England Lions at Worcester yesterday. Collingwood may be tougher; Hussey, on song, is the better player. Verdict: Hussey
Andrew Flintoff v Shane Watson
Do we need to go on? Verdict: Flintoff
Matt Prior v Brad Haddin
Tough one. Prior is probably the better batsman - he could get in England's team as a batsman alone - although Haddin, while no Adam Gilchrist, is not a slouch with the stick. And 'keeping? Haddin is no Ian Healy either, but he is tidier than Prior. Prior has improved and kept well in the West Indies series, but there is always a fumble around the corner that will attract the critics' attention. Verdict: draw
Stuart Broad v Mitchell Johnson
Two outstanding young cricketers. Johnson has come of age in the past 12 months, leading Australia's attack with menace and skill and becoming a dangerous batsman down the order. He will be the bowler who causes Pietersen, and England's other batsmen, most problems.
Broad has considerable talent of his own, having increased his pace this year, but he doesn't yet have Johnson's explosiveness or ability to turn a game with ball or bat. Verdict: Johnson
James Anderson v Brett Lee
The girls may have a battle on their hands deciding who they would prefer on their arm, but, right now, each captain would rather Anderson was taking the new ball. Lee has the reputation, greater pedigree and more Test wickets (310 to Anderson's 128), but while his career graph is past its peak and declining, Anderson's is on the rise. Lee has never really enjoyed bowling in England (average 45.44 as against 30.81 overall), where his low trajectory means a lack of bounce, nor has he been at his best against England (average 40.61).
Anderson is at the peak of his powers, able to swing the ball both ways at good pace and strong enough to bowl fast all day and stay fit throughout the series. Verdict: Anderson
Graeme Swann v Nathan Hauritz
Hauritz may not play if Australia decide to put all their eggs in the pace-bowling basket and their uncertainty over whether to play their one specialist spinner or leave the slow bowling to part-timers such as Clarke, Katich and Marcus North tells you all you need to know about Hauritz. There are no bad Australia cricketers, but it is hard to see Hauritz giving England's batsmen sleepless nights.
Swann continues to surprise with his clever variations of flight and spin and with his evident relish for the heat of battle. Hauritz spends more time bemoaning his bad luck at following Warne. Boo hoo. Verdict: Swann
Ryan Sidebottom v Peter Siddle
Will it be Sidebottom or Graham Onions or Stephen Harmison? Will it be Siddle or Stuart Clark? Sidebottom-Siddle is the battle of the hot-headed redheads. Siddle is a relative unknown here but is better than his obscurity might suggest. Wholehearted in the best traditions of Australian fast bowling, whose last ball of the day will be as heavy as his first and whose tongue is sure to be given plenty of use, he has a good record in his brief career to date.
Sidebottom has a temper, too, although it is not always best utilised. He has the advantage of his left-arm angle and swing, but carries question marks about his fitness and ability to bowl quickly for prolonged periods. Verdict: draw
A composite team, then, includes five Englishmen, four Australians and two hybrids - Haddin/Prior, Sidebottom/Siddle - the last being a truly terrifying thought. For the first time in more than two decades, England shade it on pure ability. The heart, and the head, say England - just.
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