As a well known resident who has enjoyed considerable success in football and the film industry, Vinnie Jones is in a better position than most to advise David Beckham before his arrival in Los Angeles tomorrow, although the former England captain may consider his tips to be little more than poisoned darts.

The essence of Jones’s uncompromising message is that Beckham should shun the celebrity spotlight in favour of the training pitch, devoting all of his energies to the “first-division standard” football rather than “Premiership” star-gazing.

The straight-talking Jones may struggle to conceal his contempt for Victoria Beckham, but there is more to his words than the aggression of a retired midfield hard-man. As a veteran of 43 films in seven years, the former Wales captain understands the workings of this city inside out, as well as having a good footballing relationship with Alexi Lalas, the general manager of the Los Angeles Galaxy, as the centre-back pairing of Hollywood United, the celebrity team.

“Beckham has to keep his head down and concentrate on playing football,” Jones said. “If she’s going to drag him to all these do’s, the worm will turn because they won’t have it. They are putting a lot of trust in Lalas and there’s a lot of weight on his shoulders. And I tell you this: say Lalas gets the hump with him and it starts getting out, the whole of California will turn against him.

“Americans back Americans. At the moment, the Americans are saying Beckham’s the best thing since sliced bread, but if he doesn’t do it and he’s off clubbing, that’ll be the end of it. I’d love it if he just came here and you didn’t see him for three months or six months. That’s what he owes the club, the money he’s getting. After every win he can go to a premiere.”

Given the number of A-listers in town, Jones is enjoying relaxing in relative anonymity as he searches for a new house off Sunset Boulevard, but he is concerned that the Beckhams will be drawn into the celebrity circus.

“This is the Premiership if you want to be famous,” Jones said. “This is her [Victoria’s] stage. She’ll pout, she loves it and it’s part of her daily diet. All these retards write about her various hairdos. She’ll change her hair, or he’ll change his hair. She’ll change her dress and he’ll wear her dress.

“His missus loves all that, but what they’ve got to be careful of is saturating themselves. People here do get p***ed off. They could go to three parties every night and they’ll be invited to them because they’re the new kids on the block, but they get dropped very quickly here. It’s a cruel world. We were out here for the Lock, Stock [ and Two Smoking Barrels] premiere and Patrick Swayze turned up. He was on the red carpet and people were, like, ‘Yeah, yeah, go away, has-been.’ He’s a legend, the geezer.”

With the Galaxy having earned an additional £7 million in ticket sales on last season, there is little doubt that the Beckham brand is having a positive effect, but Jones believes that the new fans are drawn to fame rather than football.

“The interest is in Posh and Becks,” he said. “There are people who will be going to the Galaxy who have never been to a football match in their lives. They won’t know what they’re watching because they won’t be watching the game. They’ll be watching him. They won’t care about what sort of strip the LA Galaxy wear because David Beckham is Mick Jagger, he’s Bruce Willis – a mega, mega star.

“Football will never catch on properly [here], it’s an impossibility. How long will the interest last? I think that after half a season, or maybe six months, people will start thinking, ‘Oh, we’ve done that now. Personally, I think he’ll do this year, maybe a bit of the following year, then go, ‘b*****ks to this’ and he’ll pack it in.”

Lalas is unlikely to enjoy reading his teammate’s assessment of the Galaxy, either, with Jones claiming that even at the age of 42 he is good enough to play for them. “I reckon me and Frank Leboeuf [the former Chel-sea defender who also plays for Hollywood United] could still play for the Galaxy, Frank definitely,” Jones said. “It’s very much like first-division football. He’s going to be shut down and he’s going to be a massive target.

“The football will be easy enough, but what’s he going to do? Take a few free kicks. He’s not going to tackle anyone, is he? He’s not going to be playing like he did against Greece [in 2001]. He won’t be able to maintain that level that he needs to be playing for his country and he’ll get frustrated.”

Having recently sold his two homes in London after tiring of the transatlantic commute, Jones gave warning of the potential impact of jet lag on Beckham’s international aspirations. “When you travel east it takes you two to three weeks to get over it,” he said. “Beckham’s got three days. At 4pm you can’t hold your head up. He won’t be able to do it. I know Lalas has said he’ll help him as much as they can, but I think the time difference is going to be his biggest problem if he wants to keep playing for England. You want at least two weeks, otherwise it’ll burn him out.”

Beckham may not like to listen, but he cannot claim that he has not been warned.

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