IN A more ordinary world, Lionel Messi would be pinning up posters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and hanging around bus-stops with a videophone and half a litre of flat Woodpecker cider. This is no normal teenager, however, and the world he inhabits is a brave new one.

If José Mourinho is even half as clever as he would have his bathroom mirror believe, then we must assume his verbal mauling of Messi’s death rolls at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday was a gratuitous smokescreen. The Argentine prodigy had just been a football dominatrix, tying up Asier Del Horno in knots, manacling him to his inadequacies and issuing a savage beating.

Anyone who can remember the sudden loss of gravity suffered by Claude Makelele, Arjen Robben and most of the Champions League-winning FC Porto side in recent times will accept that Messi’s crime was not unusual. And when not lying down, Messi was outstanding, performing the neat trick of hitting the bar while raising it.

It is to the detriment of Mourinho’s supposed sagacity that these epic encounters with Barcelona have been reduced to the level of conspiracy theories, phantom boots up the backside, Uefa hearings and who said what to whom and where. The reality is that Messi’s display evinced the dawn of a new age in world football, one hinted at the previous night when Francesc Fàbregas shoved Zinedine Zidane into the generation gap. Still a graceful player of high intellect, the taunt of time did to Zidane what no opponent had managed in his pomp.

By the end of the World Cup, Zidane will be 34. David Beckham will be 31 and Raúl and Ronaldo both 29 — all very good players, all past their best. Fàbregas has long served notice of his potential, but has struggled to take games by the scruff of the neck in the manner of a peak-time Patrick Vieira. Tuesday night in the Bernabéu may have been his coming of age, although the gentle pace of an off-key Real Madrid side is a world away from the sledgehammer subtlety of the Barclays Premiership. Still, Fàbregas’s time is coming and, like Messi, he is still a teen.

Being small, skilled and Argentine, Messi has been called the new Maradona. That is a well-worn moniker, albeit most incumbents end up more like the present Maradona, bloated with expectations and saddened by “what ifs”. The difference with Messi is the new Maradona tag came from the old Maradona. It is also worth remembering that Messi is 18, while Maradona’s World Cup bow came when he was pushing 22.

In Italy, Gianluca Vialli believes that Valeri Bojinov, 20 last week, is the new Christian Vieri. The Bulgarian may be little-known over here, but he played in Serie A at 15, banged in goals for fun with Fiorentina last season and spent last month being the subject of a possible loan deal involving Inter Milan and Francesco Toldo.

Bruce Buck, the Chelsea chairman, has admitted that Freddy Adu, “the new Pelé”, might be of interest, should he prove as “good as they say”, and it is inevitable that the American will leave DC United for a top European club in the near future. Messi, by contrast, is reportedly under contract until 2014.

As for England, the good news is that on the Arsenal bench in the Bernabéu was a slight figure by the name of Theo Walcott. Aged 16, costing £12 million and awaiting his debut, he has been billed as the “new Thierry Henry”. If that proves to be the case then the old guard really will have had its day. Say hello, wave goodbye.

BOYS TO MEN

LIONEL MESSI, AGED 18: Argentinian star on world stage, creative genius, pint-sized, left-footed and a little devious . . . perhaps Messi really is the next Maradona.

VALERI BOJINOV, 20: The Bulgaria striker became the youngest foreigner to play in Serie A at 15 and left Lecce for Fiorentina for £10 million at 18.

FRANCESC FÀBREGAS, 18: The midfield player is so young he was born when George Graham was managing Arsenal. At 16 became Arsenal’s youngest player and goalscorer.

FREDDY ADU, 16: Will face his native Ghana if selected for World Cup by the United States, who recently made him their youngest ever player. Appeared in that country’s MLS at 14.

THEO WALCOTT, 16: Debut for Southampton this season and sat on Arsenal bench at the Bernabéu in midweek.

BILL EDGAR