Leaders of the Grass Roots Football Live (GRFL) show, which starts at the NEC in Birmingham this morning, believe that Wayne Rooney needs to recognise his status as the ultimate role model to the next generation and start moderating his frustration.

The England player's foul-mouthed reaction to the yellow card that he incurred in the 2-0 victory over the United States on Wednesday, which was caught on live television, has evoked a new wave of condemnation.

Steve Chittenden, events organiser of the GRFL show, believes that the FA's Respect campaign needs to start at the top. “As someone who's a role model to so many of the young people in this country, it's Wayne Rooney's job to be leading the way,” he said. “One or two moments of madness can set these kids back so far. You will see kids out in the park or back at school on Monday re-enacting Rooney's reaction.

“I understand he's a fantastic player who lives on the edge but he's still got a responsibility to teach our young players how to behave. He knows it's all going out live on television. You can say he's a flawed genius who shouldn't be tamed, but what's the point of having a flawed genius sitting banned on the touchlines for your big games?” Chittenden believes that referees are under pressure to avoid dismissing the likes of Rooney. “Football in the main is run by the clubs,” he said. “They'll say it's a multimillion-pound industry and they want their players on the field of play, otherwise it costs them. The TV companies want Rooney on the pitch. But he can't be above the rules of the game.

“You can't blame the referees. They are handicapped, under pressure to turn a blind eye. The first one to red card Rooney will be castigated. But I hate this defence of it being 'a man's game' and industrial language being part of the game. The message should start from the top of the game downwards. It also needs to be supported from the bottom up - the aggressive touchline dad bellowing at the referee is bound to influence his son.”

Darren Laver, the director of coaching at Ball Fusion, one of GRFL's lead attractions as it teaches young players to play alongside dance and music, said: “What we do is not so much coach the technique as coach the person. We talk about self-respect, respecting others. To make a great player, you need to make a great person.”

As for Rooney's excesses, Laver said: “I think it's part of the English mentality. We win through aggression, going over the top from the trenches, battling through. If we could get kids back to enjoying the game as they do on the streets, playing with a smile and expressing themselves, that would enhance their behaviour.

“This boils down to Rooney being allowed to get away with it. It shouldn't be accepted. If Rooney swears at a referee after being cautioned, he should be sent off. That would get the message through.”