Sir Bobby Robson, that northern rock of ages, took a bow as St James’ Park applauded the unveiling of a statue in his hon-our and his 75th birthday. Some features on football’s landscape are constant. Manchester United’s ability to torment Newcastle seems as unextinguishable as Sir Bobby. In the build-up Kevin Keegan had, unwisely, been persuaded to reminisce about his famous 5-0 victory 11 seasons ago but that result stands as a gross exception when it comes to meetings between these sides. In history, no team has put the ball more often in Newcastle’s net nor won against them more times than Manchester United. And, in the present day, certain things seem guaranteed. When the black and white shirts are before them, Wayne Rooney will play a blinder and Ronaldo will fill his golden boots.

Another prekickoff entertainment was a ball-juggling show by two “football freestylers”, but it was Rooney who staged the real exhibition. He scored twice and played three positions, striker, midfielder, winger, each of them consummately. It is not always the case, but sometimes there are games when you understand why comparisons made early in his career between Rooney and the multi-faceted Duncan Edwards may prove prophetic. Ronaldo was an effortless virtuoso. Without nearing full intensity, the Portuguese piled two lovely goals upon the hat-trick he scored against Newcastle at Old Trafford as United, reinstalled as bookmakers’ favourites for the title, closed on Arsenal at the top. Their supporters crowed “Kevin Keegan: What’s the difference you have made?” at anguished locals forced to endure another disappointing instalment of their messiah’s second coming as manager.

“I’m 110% committed to this club and you can’t get more committed than that,” was the Keeganism Keegan uttered afterwards as he had to respond, for the first time since his return six games ago, to questions about whether he might quit.

It was hard to know what was the greater factor, Manchester United being good or Newcastle being so utterly bad. Keegan admitted his team now faces a relegation fight but proclaimed himself “optimistic”, saying he had been consoled by the effort shown by his side. Yet he conceded: “We’re an honest group of players who care, but just being honest and caring is not enough in the Premier League.”

Even when, at a corner, Amdy Faye thumped home from close range to bring the score back to 3-1, it proved no more than an interlude amid the punishment. Manchester United were merely changing which hand held the whip, and the beating resumed.

Almost immediately, Rooney was curling home the pick of the goals from 20 yards out and in stoppage time Louis Saha made it 5-1 in a manner that showed Manchester United’s quality and Newcastle’s vulnerability. Keegan’s players were actually attacking their opponents’ box when the counter-attack was begun by Carlos Tevez. Saha drove down the middle, holding off challenges, and then Rooney retained possession inside Newcastle’s area before returning the ball to Saha, who sidefooted in.

Yet Newcastle had begun well, with Nicky Butt and Alan Smith providing feisty impetus and Damien Duff and James Milner getting down the flanks. Their crosses regularly failed to elude visiting defenders, however, who, focused and competitive, took their cue from Rio Ferdinand. Briefly, it seemed Manchester United might be undone by a tendency to overadorn.

Sir Alex Ferguson kept the opposition guessing, asking Nani and Ronaldo to swap flanks. Habib Beye, taking a physical approach, had quietened Nani but found Ronaldo more challenging and, sprung by Nemanja Vidic, Ronaldo spurted to the touchline before checking back past Beye and crossing sweetly. Rooney, left by a daydreaming Charles N’Zogbia, volleyed home. Newcastle tried responding but United were defending too well for a comeback, even at 1-0, to be a realistic possibility and Ferguson ordered another rotation, with Rooney and Ronaldo swapping places, and soon it was 2-0. The accuracy and angles of Michael Carrick’s passing were a joy and, with a gorgeous ball that sliced between Beye and Taylor, he released Ronaldo, who executed the finish perfectly. Two-nil at half-time and it should have been 3-0. Moments before Ronaldo’s strike, Nani had danced round N’Zogbia and bent a cross to the back post, where Tevez headed wide with the unguarded goal beseeching.

Shay Given had played despite a groin injury and Newcastle’s medical staff concluded all that bending down to pluck the ball from the net could not be good for him. Steve Harper came on and did not have to wait long to suffer. Duff twisted away from Ferdinand, but Edwin van der Sar saved with his knees and it was Newcastle’s last stab at redemption.

Home fans laughed when Ronaldo slipped while chesting down Tevez’s pass, only to see their defence suffer one of its habitual outbreaks of comedy. Instead of clearing, Faye tried a risky pass, Darren Fletcher intercepted and sent Ronaldo through again. At speed, Ronaldo nutmegged Taylor then picked his nimble way round Harper before scoring from an angle. Twenty-nine goals for the season: Ferguson withdrew him, perhaps thinking No 30 should be saved for Old Trafford.

Kev’s woes

- Kevin Keegan’s six games in charge have ended in two draws and four defeats

- They have scored three and conceded 16 goals

- Newcastle haven’t won in the league since beating Fulham 2-1 on December 15 - that’s 11 league matches without a win

- Their longest run without a win is 14 games in 1999

- When Keegan took over they were 11th with 26 points from 22 games; before yesterday they were 13th with 28 points from 26