I wouldn’t make a great manager, which is why I haven’t tried, but it’s not as though I have nothing to contribute. I could definitely help strikers. I don’t think it is that difficult to work out how to score goals but, looking around, I am not sure how many of them really think about it or how much they care.

Take Jermain Defoe. He’s got a lot going for him — he’s sharp, quick, scores great goals. But some help with his movement could get him another ten a season.

I would go through the timing of runs and the need to gamble. I watch most strikers and they react, like defenders, to where the ball is going. You’ve got to guess, to go even if nine times out of ten the ball never reaches you.

That’s damn hard work and I’m not sure people ever gave me much credit. They’d say: “Oh, right place, right time”, but what they didn’t realise is that you’d been making that run all day, making sure you were in the right place all the time, gambling so that you were half a yard ahead of the defender. It’s not rocket science, but only a few seem to understand.

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I’ve never taken a coaching session but I’ll go through it with my 12-year-old son, who’s at the Chelsea academy, a striker just like me — he even runs the same, fingers spread. You don’t need to go on to the training pitch to learn this simple lesson and if an individual called or wrote, I’d be more than happy to help out.

I don’t think many strikers get good coaching because many managers don’t understand it, having not been great strikers themselves. There have been forwards — Kenny Dalglish, Mark Hughes — but how many out-and-out goalscorers? Maybe it is because we are individuals within a team sport.

Strikers don’t make great managers — discuss. We’re a selfish bunch by nature and maybe that’s the problem. To be bluntly honest, I would be reasonably happy if we lost a game 3-1 if I’d scored. That’s quite an admission. I had a chat with Alan Shearer and he said much the same.

It’s very selfish but goals are how everyone judges you. They’re what your career adds up to. And particularly goals in meaningful games, which is why, during pre-season, I’d tell the centre halves: “Don’t kick me and I’ll make you look good.” It’s probably not the thought process of a budding manager.

I’ve had offers. Doug Ellis made contact about Aston Villa many years ago. Leicester City, my home-town club, came on the phone a couple of times. But I have never been tempted in the slightest and less now than ever. I’d rather have my ears pinned back — or give up eating crisps — than take the England job, even if you offered it to me tomorrow.

I’d be fine at encouraging players, the ones who need an arm round the shoulder — and most are like that. But I’m placid by nature and would struggle with the ones who need a kick up the backside.

That little bit of fear is more essential than ever with players being so wealthy and able to agitate for moves. The best managers — Sir Alex Ferguson, Martin O’Neill — keep the players on their toes at all times.

Maybe the job would have brought out a tougher streak in me, but I wouldn’t be willing to sacrifice every waking hour. While I love the game, it’s never been my whole life.

No, I’ve no desire to ruin a contented existence. There are a few very successful managers at the big clubs, but the rest are working like dogs just to keep their heads above water. Even the best of them have endless hassles. Just look at Rafael Benítez and his battle for more control at Liverpool. Who would the fans trust to choose new signings — a Champions League-winning manager or Rick Parry, the club’s chief executive? It’s a no-brainer, but all sorts of politics seem to be at play at Anfield.

Then there’s Hughes. He’s an old friend and a fine manager, but you have to wonder if the Arab owners at Manchester City will give him sufficient time.

It’s not for me. I was lucky I found something else in the game that I love. I wanted to go into broadcasting from my mid-twenties, so much so that the England players nicknamed me Junior Des. I accept it is a cushy number compared with the strains of management, but those of us on the sofa appreciate the difficulties of the job, which is why it’s very rare for any of us to say a manager should be sacked.

Next week: Lineker on whether the sheikhs are good for English football

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My Premier League Dream Team

David Seaman is Peter Schmeichel’s only serious rival but it’s impossible to overlook the big Dane. Not only was he a superb goalkeeper and defensive organiser, was also a ferocious competitor.

At full back, Denis Irwin gets in on either side. Alan Hansen used to say he was the best left and right back in the country. Ashley Cole is brilliant, particularly when he’s not constrained, as he was at times under José Mourinho at Chelsea.

Rio Ferdinand is the first centre back on my teamsheet, a classy defender who has found the concentration and consistency to be ranked among the very best in the world. You can make cases for Gary Pallister, John Terry, Steve Bruce, Marcel Desailly and others, but what a combination with Rio and Tony Adams, an old adversary who would give you his all.

I used to tell the referee in the tunnel before the match: “Watch out for him in the first ten minutes or he’ll wallop me.” Tony rarely let me down.