Alyson Rudd
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The jeers that rang round the Olympic Stadium, in Barcelona, last week were aimed at England stars not simply because they were not playing well. Football fans are tired of how dull players have become. The present crop of England internationals lacks sparkle and controversy. Nobody sticks their tongue out when the National Anthem is played. Steven Gerrard is a fabulous player but he rarely gets the giggles. Paul Robinson has never knowingly attempted the scorpion save. Owen Hargreaves is prepared to live in Germany.
It could have been so different. Jimmy Bullard, the Fulham midfield player, was on the verge of an England call-up when he twisted his leg last September after tangling with Scott Parker, of Newcastle United. Bullard, known as Maggie Thatcher to his teammates, is renowned for his atrocious dress sense and his intense relationship with fish. Since he injured his cruciate ligament he has devoted himself to angling.
Bullard’s knee specialist in America, Dr Richard Steadman, recommended that Bullard uses the treadmill, the bike and swimming exercises to help him recover. Bullard uses the fishing to help himself to cope psychologically. “I get so focused, it’s like an addiction,” he said. “I’ll soon be better at fishing than I am at football.”
But Bullard does not just find a shady spot on the riverbank, lean against his rucksack, munch on a few sandwiches and gaze dreamily into the water. He has sent ripples through the angling community with his competitive spirit and has won two £800 prizes.
Bullard acknowledges that he is making waves. “Maybe a few people get the hump, this footballer taking the money,” he told this month’s edition of FourFourTwo magazine. However, he is not apologetic. “Sod ’em. I’m here to win,” he said.
Some of the more established anglers were not, therefore, too upset when the Fulham player fell in the water on several occasions but they were astonished to see Bullard drop his mobile phone in the lake. “It stayed there for five hours because I carried on fishing, then I scooped it out with the landing net and it still worked. Good phone, that one.”
Bullard is the latest in a long line of footballer angling enthusiasts. Most players prefer golf, cards or squabble over the Play-Station. The quirkier characters, though, choose fishing.
Jack Charlton may have been part of England’s 1966 World Cup-winning side but for many, the abiding image is of a man in a cloth cap clutching a fishing rod. As an apprentice at Newcastle, Paul Gascoigne begged Charlton, the club’s manager at the time, for an angling lesson. Charlton reportedly poured a bottle of Newcastle Brown Ale into the water, the fish went wild and he caught one immediately. It could be argued Gascoigne took the wrong message from that masterclass.
These days, footballers have to careful about their image. Every inch of good publicity generated by players donating their wages to nurses can be ruined by a single murdered trout. “All the fish go back in the lake afterwards,” Bullard said. “I never eat them — I love them. I caress them back in.”
Football fans can embrace not only Bullard’s eccentricities but his refreshing approach to marriage. Not for him the red carpet, the designer sunglasses and the world of WAGs.
“My missus goes bonkers sometimes when I come back stinking of fish,” Bullard said. “She gets the hump when I wake her up at half past 6 in the morning, then bring my maggots in and the car’s muddy. But she’s all right really.”
Envious anglers might want to take a closer look at Bullard’s methods. He uses a new bait — PVA — which comprises pellets that dissolve in water. “The first match I tried it, there were 75 anglers and I won. I couldn’t believe it,” he said.
Taking the bait
Football’s fishermen
— Jack Charlton The former Ireland manager is campaigning to keep gyrodactylus salaris, a deadly parasite, out of rivers
— Paul Gascoigne Spent a week’s wages on fishing tackle in order to impress Charlton, his manager at Newcastle United
— David Seaman The former England goalkeeper likes keeping doves and loves carp fishing
— Lee Bowyer The West Ham United midfield player was filmed by Sky TV having fun at the Mid Kent Fisheries
— Vinnie Jones The former Wimbledon star loves shooting, dogs, horses, cars, making movies and fishing
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Chelsea's Arjen Robben has been spotted pole fishing for carp at Willinghurst Fisheries, near Guildford!
Ted, London, UK